(Untitled)

[birdwotcher]

Funny how things go from brilliant to shite so quickly. Does it happen this way for most, or am I just especially lucky?

I'm beginning to miss the days where I threw myself into my work and stayed there. Having a so-called 'social life' isn't at all what it's cracked up to be. Perhaps a holiday isn't completely out of order.

I'm a teensy bit

Comments

Private to Tonks

[fire_n_freckles]

How are you still sloshed? Didn't get enough the other night? We could barely stand! Do we need another outting to fix you?

Er, mind you, I can hardly help with the sex bits. Just the drinking yourself under the table bit.

Ginny

Private to Ginny

[birdwotcher]

I drank more. And one can never have enough alcohol, I've decided. And I'm afraid I'm far past being fixed.

No worries, Ginny. You're a very pretty girl, but I'm afraid I just don't swing that way.

* T

Private to Tonks

[fire_n_freckles]

Don't say that, Tonks. You're not even properly broken.

If you should ever change your mind, I'm there for you. Even if you're not strictly my type.

Ginny

Private to Ginny

[birdwotcher]

'Properly broken' is all relative, I suppose. It depends what sort of break we're talking about.

Thanks, love, I appreciate it.

* T

Private to Nymphadora

[la_morte_bella]

Soliciting yourself already? I can hardly say I'm surprised.

[PRIVATE TO BELLATRIX]

[birdwotcher]

If I expected to be paid, it'd be solicitation. However, that takes all of the fun out of it. Not that I'd expect you to know.

Private to Nymphadora

[la_morte_bella]

Solicitation doesn't require the exchange of money.

Private to Aunt Trixie

[birdwotcher]

Perhaps.

I do believe you were right all along about the Muggle issue, Aunt Trixie. They're worthless. They're either gay, taken, or lousy bastards.

You wouldn't happen to know any men who wouldn't mind dating a blood traitor, would you?

Private to 'Dora

[m4moony]

I understand you're upset. But, don't do this, 'Dora. I don't want to see you hurt yourself over this.

-- RJL

Private to Remus

[birdwotcher]

It's Tonks. Don't do what? Enjoy myself with a perfect stranger? I didn't realise there was anyone left who wasn't a perfect stranger with whom to enjoy myself.

I'm fine, you have no reason to worry. Casual sex is something I'm very good at.

* T

Private to 'Dora

[m4moony]

No. Don't throw yourself at any willing body just to prove you still 'have it', that you couldn't really have 'turned me gay'. I'm not an idiot. I know precisely what the point is of your not-so-subtle and very public comments. You were worried that anyone who knew I was with Severus would think 'wasn't he with that little Auror'?

Well, how many do you think are reading your words and thinking "Why the emphasis on shagging a straight man? Didn't she used to be with that werewolf? Could he be gay?" That's not solely your dirty laundry you're hanging out to dry.

I still care about you, 'Dora. Maybe not in a manner you might have hoped at one time, but I do care and I don't want to see you hurting yourself like this. Casual sex is not going to make things any better.

-- RJL

Private to Remus

[birdwotcher]

I know I still have it. I don't have to prove that to anyone. I have the distinct advantage of looking like any man's dream--except for yours, of course. And I am very good in the bedroom (not that you'd know, but I suppose now you do). I don't need anyone telling me those things

Private to Author

[silhouetteatrox]

Hahahahaha. I don't remember everyone here being so consistently funny! Things seemed to have changed for the better since my last stay.

I wish I knew your name, Miss "T," so I might more personally congratulate you on your stance. This is the most refreshing thing I've read in ages.

Here's hoping you don't feel too apologetic once you've sobered up.

[PRIVATE TO COMMENTER]

[birdwotcher]

Tonks. And I'm glad you found it amusing. I do try.

I don't feel apologetic at all. One never should for honesty.

Private to Tonks

[silhouetteatrox]

I was being sincere before, lest you forget that I'm not one of the plethora of loved (or not?) ones that undoubtedly jumped down your throat at this little proposition. It was, again, refreshing in its honesty.

Aren't you wonderful, then? A brave woman in a careful, careful world. I quite agree, on the honesty front.

Oh, and while we're at it: I'm Ciarán.

Private to Ciaran

[birdwotcher]

Oh, I did take it to be sincerity. No reason not to, really. And I'm happy you found it refreshing. As I said, I do try.

I'd hardly call myself brave for being honest. But I am glad we agree when it comes to honesty.

Wotcher, Ciarán. It's a pleasure to 'meet' you. You wouldn't happen to be interested in the offered drinks and potential shag, would you?

Private to Ms Nymphadora Tonks

[subtle_simmer]

((ooc: According to hp_briglish and others, the abbreviation 'Ms' is very much an Americanism, and only used in Britain when one is trying to be derogatory and imply the woman wearing the title is either a slag or a lesbian. *wink*))

Oh, bravo, Ms Tonks. You have now officially surpassed the bar for both idiocy and cruelty in one very brief soliloquy. I am nearly without words to express my awe-struck incredulity.

Nearly.

You are, of course, free to offer yourself in any fashion you wish to any ruffian who cares to answer your delightfully phrased and wholly public advertisement, and suffer all related consequence of bodily injury, disease, and defamation of character which might result. Though, after a display such as this, really, what sort of character must you be assumed to possess?

You are NOT at liberty to wound Remus with your savage little digs any more than you already have done. Your cruelty, here, is truly unsurpassed. Your Auntie Bellatrix would be proud. Bravo. I applaud you

Private to Mr Severus Shirtlifter

[birdwotcher]

[ooc: ooh, evil, he is!]I do try

Private to Madame Nymphadora Slag

[subtle_simmer]

Very true. It would appear that Remus and I are among the few men who have not trod that well-beaten path. I am quite glad of the distinction.

Here you are quite incorrect, proving your own idiocy yet again. Pray tell - how did you manage to become an Auror? If we both discount that Remus possesses something you clearly do not - a forgiving spirit and a gentleness of emotion which makes him think well of even the most undeserving - your ability to hurt him extends to something far more literal.

Does it not occur to you that your Auntie Bellatrix is quite at-liberty? Do not imagine that she is ignorant to your relationship with Remus. Only Remus or Charlie Weasley could be assumed to be implied by your clumsy public innuendo.

Have you forgotten that Fenrir Greyback has never known the long-arm of the law?

Obviously you have no thought for Remus, for either his emotional nor physical well-being. Fortunately, he does not need any such consideration from you, as he has MEDrawing attention to Remus in this fashion immediately

Private to Professor Bender

[birdwotcher]

Do you honestly think I could have written something like that and not been well-aware that I was opening myself up to being called a slag? Merlin, Snape, you're even more of an idiot than I thought if you thought that sorts of immature name-name calling was going to hurt my feelings.

Well, Snape, let's think. Remus and I haven't been together for a year. Before that, we were together for three, and no one knew that we hadn't been shagging, so for all intents and purposes, as far as anyone else is concerned, we were. Since then, it's been a year. I've been with other men who weren't Remus. Most recently, I was seen dancing with Bill, a well-known married man, and you, a well-known recluse with long hair who enjoys his privacy. So if anyone were thought to be gay, you have much, much more of a possibility of being that person than Remus ever does