God damn I am so fucking restless. I NEED this RETA meeting to pull through for me and get me a job. I am starting to feel that stagnation feeling hardcore again and I FUCKING HATE IT. Really, school just made it easy for me to ignore my situation. It isn't new anymore though and now I can't ignore my poverty. PRA SICK OF THIS LIFESTYLE. I've ( Read more... )

Usually I look forward to Christmas. I actually used to look forward to all holidays. Even though my family is kinda fruxed up, I liked seeing them just to shoot the shit. Now though, it seems as everyone gets older they get more crotchety and angry. There is like three feuds in progress on my dad's side of the family so we don't get together ( Read more... )

I'm not talking about hot. There are plenty of "porn hot" type chicks. Ya know, the dirty lookin kind of chicks. Naw, I'm talking straight up beautiful. They are really far and few between, but every once and a while you see a really truly beautiful porn star and you think, "how is it that this chick's opinion of herself is so utterly low?"

So I went to my "tour" of US Cold Storage today. Last week, I cold called the place asking if they had any internship/job shadowing positions available there. The chief engineer guy that I talked to said they didn't so I asked him if they could at least give me a tour of the facilities. He said sure and gave me his direct phone number and told ( Read more... )

Man this whole day had me down big time. I couldn't stop thinking about how I'm not going to see Haruka. Usually I don't miss her. At least not intensely where it gets stuck on my mind but man, it was just overwhelming me today. Several layers of emotion. You can't always get what you want, but sometimes man, shit just piles on and it doesn't ( Read more... )

Was gonna go see Haruka for her birthday over thanksgiving. My grandparent's car insurance changed though. Since I am a secondary driver I can't drive the car out of state. Can't afford to fly because of the extra cost of actually getting to and from the airport to Delaware. BIG POOR BIG HATE IT BABY LUIGI NUMBER NOT ONE.

Pra cold called this place today askin if they have any internship or job shadowing positions open. They didn't. I was pra sweating my balls off. Hate cold calling. HATE IT. The guy did give me his direct phone number though so I can schedule a tour of their facilities next week. He also told me about this RETA group that is specifically for ( Read more... )

So I have a standing desk now. Sometimes I just stand in front of my computer for hours while stumbling. I feel less guilty about it though because im standing instead of sitting. Sometimes when I'm listening to music, I dance in place. So?

My livejournal switched to Japanese and I don't remember making that change.

So all the info I hear on my sister is second hand but the story just gets more fucked up as I learn more. First of all, she moved to Florida. I didn't think it was too weird that she didn't tell me this but apparently she didn't tell most people. Including my other sister. The deadbeat guy she is with is supposed to be managing some store that ( Read more... )

So one of my farm friends told me about some house they drove by asking for someone to chop wood for them. My friend gave them my number. They called me and I went over and saw how much wood they had (thats what she said). I could tell that this guy was kinda a hardass asshole type. He was worried that I was gonna come there with an axe and ( Read more... )