Part CCCIII - His hair could not conceal his growing excitement!

[babb_chronicles]

(link)
What the Bloody hell Malfoy? - She is mad. ouh shit I’m died.
*
Ouh God Malfoy spill it out?!! - That really started to piss me off - IwantUtoBeMyVacationSecretFriend- He was red as bee
*At least after war my family well mostly my father have changed he wants me to “bright up” family name, shish Like I care about it everyone hates me anyway

Comments

[valis2]

“My lord I know Granger better than all of you but together. She is one hell of a stubborn witch. We will have to kiss up to her, and trick her. Give her a nice room, big bed, colourful room. All of us be nice to her, and then she might get caught off guard. But then the person who will do her will have to be closet with her. The person you chose should be smart, funny, completive, young and handsome. Who do you suggest?”

Oh yes, all Hermione needs is to see a room put together by Interior Designer Draco with some nice colors, and she'll be all over him. "Oooh, Draco, I love what you did with the pillows! Simply brilliant! STICK ME WITH YOUR WANG RIGHT NOW!"

I love how the Dark Lord gives Draco a year for this plan to work. Just like all his other plans that mysteriously revolve around the school year.

[cheryl_bites]

Oh yes, all Hermione needs is to see a room put together by Interior Designer Draco with some nice colors, and she'll be all over him. "Oooh, Draco, I love what you did with the pillows! Simply brilliant! STICK ME WITH YOUR WANG RIGHT NOW!"

Perhaps she's been watching too much Queer Eye? It might have seemed feasible.

[valis2]

Or perhaps she's just a huge fan of Trading Spaces. Imagine what she'd do with Malfoy Manor...

[valenstyne]

This batch is too funny!

and magic death big mosnter and magic got RONN OUT OF DEAD DROWN TRAIN OCEAN!
I…I can't stop laughing. This must be a troll. Even HP fanbrats aren't that dumb.

A/n I most likely spelt that wrong, well don’t blame me blame this guy in my class Akeem for distracting me during class.
Dammit, Akeem, you should have KEPT distracting her until she stopped writing!

Suddenly I felt faint. Pain coursed through my body. Pain, pain and more pain.
I ran outside and stood still and plunged the small knife into my skin and felt the familiar pleasure flow through my body. I deserved this, the pain was my savior. It reminded me of the pain I conflicted on others, the pain that had pierced my soul.
So…pain, then? You shouldn't be so vague, dear.

“Get pretty or I’ll tell dad!” Were Dudley’s last words before he disappeared up the stairs.
Wait, that's almost in character.

He is acting weird, no seriously he is weird he looks at me like I was some kind of cotton eye candy.Cotton eye candy. I'm going to start saying that, now

[cheryl_bites]

ouh shit I’m died.

Oh, not again! This is going to be one of those days.

- IwantUtoBeMyVacationSecretFriend-

Did anyone else think this was his chat room handle?

I took my PC and went to Astronomy tower, that’s the only place I can reach Web, in here,

Spot the number of mistakes in this sentence. (Actually, is that how wireless internet works? It gets you better reception for your dongle? If so, I take that part back. The rest is still wrong.)

it was a long time a year ago of potter got missin and deaded.
(but peopl not kno a dead but is missin but he did it deadd)
and a sadly ron got up on a train to rode hogwerts.
him do no freinds now becuz hermine is a loser drop out hogwersts.
he take a breathes of sad and sleep.

This looks like a blues song to me. I don't know why.

What they did not know, because they had not been paying attention in Snape’s potion class, that gillyweed was an afrodiasiac.Assuming that's meant to be "aphrodisiac" and not a tribute to an ancient song by Powder... who else can see the flaw in this plan? "

[of_polyhymnia]

Harry moved closer and licked the warm, red liquid off of Draco’s two blushing pilgrims.

Please, please tell me "pilgrims" is a spell checker correction for an awful mangling of "palms".

It's actually (I know, I can't believe it either) a Shakespeare reference.

Romeo:If I profane with my unworthiest hand
This holy shrine, the gentle fine is this:
My lips, two blushing pilgrims, ready stand
To smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss.

[cheryl_bites]

Good god!! They must be studying it at school. Well, needless to say, I thought it meant testicles. *Hides*

[stage_zip]

You were right in your presumption. Can you honestly say it's not too much to ask to actually believe that this person used a Shakespearean reference. Comfort yourself with the thought that it didn't really work anyway.

[walterthewizard]

I laughed like mad for a while, than I took my PC and went to Astronomy tower, that’s the only place I can reach Web, in here, I have to put this one in Youtube…

YouTube: Let's see them Obliviate ALL of us!

Quite simply: Harry’s cow popped out of the barn door and mooed dangerously. And then, quite simply, Draco began milking the cow.

Points for an inventive euphemism.

'Collins, what do you think you are doing?' slimed snape.

The verb actually suits Snape perfectly. Too bad JKR never used it.

He knew that Sirius would want to live, prank and fuck as many girls as he could - all in all to have fun. Thinking it of this way, Harry vowed to himself that this would what he would do.

Damn right! Way to go, Harry!

[xfortytwo]

He is acting weird, no seriously he is weird he looks at me like I was some kind of cotton eye candy.

Makes me think of Cotton Eye Joe.

eta: spelling fail, bah.

[cheryl_bites]

OH GOD NO YOU REMINDED ME OF IT AS WELL! MY GOD, STOP!! *Cuts off ears*

[beardedtroll]

I prefer this version. It's more ... cosmopolitan.

[messiah_noire]

Bill Bailey FTW. xD