A bitchin' cover for a bitchin' fic !

[ask_captainjack]

Have you ever been to the WHSmith at the airport? I mean, deliberately

Comments

[ask_captainjack]

You're aroused by ME, right?

Not the unicorns.

[horcrionebay]

Well. I mean. They do have really big horns. That are shiny. They have really big, shiny horns. You know what I'm saying?

[silmerin]

THAT SPARKLE THERE IS A THING OF BEAUTY.

I LOL'd IRL, sir.

[ask_captainjack]

Three unicorns died so you could LOL, buddy.

I AGREE. IT WAS WORTH IT!

[silmerin]

BUT THEY DIED WITH GREAT SPARKLE.

On . . . the tips of their . . . horns. ::cough::

[ask_captainjack]

My fan fiction and fan fiction cover only honours them. It's better than those gorgeous sparkly bastards deserved. HA HA HA!

[gwen_e_cooper]

Love it, Boe.

Every book cover gives out a message to the observer. Yours says "I'm reading the most awesome work of literature ever!"

I'll re-read it when I'm finished with this.

[ask_captainjack]

I KNOW HOW IT ENDS.

They fuck in a gazebo and he falls off a bench and hits his head. His sight returns!

[ask_aboutcoffee]

I thought that was the ending of Jane Eyre.

[gwen_e_cooper]

No, in that, Rochester and Jane fall off the balcony when having sex and he gets his sight back.

Great. Derivative, too. I might as well just read those damned Dan Brown books Owen left in the morgue.

[ask_aboutcoffee]

It's....it's very bold, sir.

The unicorns are certainly heraldic.

Your arse looks great in that shot.

I'll. Erm. I'll contact Waterstone's. TO WARN THEM.

[ask_captainjack]

Good. I don't want a repeat of last time.

I ordered them to look up my fan fictions in their database and they just stood there like morons.

I gave them the "HAM!" voice I use when I need to buy croissanwich fixings. AND YET NOTHING.

[ask_aboutcoffee]

You can't use the ham voice in bookshops. You have to use the "NEWSPAPER!" voice in bookshops.

[ask_captainjack]

I like how it makes Theresa sit up and waggle his ears.

YES BOY

NEWSPAPERS!

[smirnoffmule]

Jack, your eyebrows are fucking epic. They deserve their own spin-off series.

[ask_captainjack]

Oh shit yeah, good call. They deserve at least a five-episode special!

[smirnoffmule]

As long as they don't get like blown up or anything D:

[teaboyfan]

Great idea! Then you could jerk your fans around for years wondering when it would appear, and start lots of horrible rumors about what might happen to your awesome eyebrows. Or has this already happened in some parallel universe?