Comments | ask_captainjack: Pantsless Coed

ask_captainjack

Pantsless Coed

May 10, 2009 16:18

Dear Captain Jack,

I have a problem with my pants. Not in them (sadly), but with them. For some reason, they continue to fall apart. When I put them on the zipper will break and prove useless. I can't go walking around with my zipper down or my pants falling off.

I've gone through possible reasons why this is happening. The pants aren't old and ( Read more... )

body-image, hovercars

Leave a comment

Back to all threads

SPEAKING OF COT ask_captainjack May 10 2009, 21:21:37 UTC

Shannon says you kids can all tag along with Ianto and me to the awards ceremony. I thought you might have to sit in the back but she says you can sit with us!

GWEN GET YOURSELF A SLUTTY DRESS!

Re: SPEAKING OF COT gwen_e_cooper May 10 2009, 21:29:19 UTC

What colour is appropriate for the COT thing?

And why slutty? That's a bit sexist, isn't it?

Plus, aren't the winners already chosen by the time we turn up at the ceremony?

Re: SPEAKING OF COT ask_captainjack May 10 2009, 21:32:29 UTC

It's not sexist. I'm going slutty too. Wait until you see how taut my thighs look in my tight trousers.

Sure the winners will be already be chosen. ALL THE BETTER to be there when Ianto gets his giant silver trophy cup. We can drink champagne from it like Secretariat!

Re: SPEAKING OF COT gwen_e_cooper May 10 2009, 21:34:30 UTC

I LOVE TROPHIES!

He'll get a loving cup for this?

Crap. I should have done the Weekly Support Logs on my blog. Never mind. Too much effort.

Re: SPEAKING OF COT ask_captainjack May 10 2009, 21:37:14 UTC

It's better when Ianto makes the effort. That's less effort for us. We're busy running Torchwood things after all.

That's why we have to be supportive of Ianto's award and thump him on the back: "GOOD JOB KID!"

Re: SPEAKING OF COT gwen_e_cooper May 10 2009, 21:39:59 UTC

Oh, believe me, Jack, I'm very supportive of Ianto doing all the work as usual.

The J Lo is nice and slutty (but: cleavage freckle, so... no? Maybe?)

Then there's the other... oh. They're all J Lo dresses, actually. Well then.

Re: SPEAKING OF COT ask_captainjack May 10 2009, 21:41:18 UTC

WOW. Well, you look hot in green. You also look hot in gold.

I guess it comes down to what matches best with what I'm wearing. I'll let you know when Ianto tells me what I'm wearing.

Re: SPEAKING OF COT ask_aboutcoffee May 10 2009, 21:46:46 UTC

I can tell you what you're not wearing, and that's the The Duke belt buckle.

Re: SPEAKING OF COT ask_captainjack May 10 2009, 21:47:50 UTC

What if my belt and shoes are brown? He matches a brown belt! What if then, Ianto?

Re: SPEAKING OF COT ask_aboutcoffee May 10 2009, 21:54:44 UTC

You know what to do in that case. You borrow mine.

( ... )

Re: SPEAKING OF COT ask_captainjack May 10 2009, 21:56:41 UTC

You know I love that buckle. I'm always sticking my pinkie in to twist the little wheels.

Re: SPEAKING OF COT ask_aboutcoffee May 10 2009, 21:47:19 UTC

The gold has the advantage of being double-sparkly.

Re: SPEAKING OF COT gwen_e_cooper May 10 2009, 22:53:43 UTC

AND the advantage of cleavage in the front and back!

My Welsh pride would be on full display! (The dragon tattoo, not the arse cleavage.)

Re: SPEAKING OF COT ask_captainjack May 10 2009, 22:54:46 UTC

DAMN GIRL!

Re: SPEAKING OF COT ask_aboutcoffee May 10 2009, 23:35:50 UTC

You have to show the tattoo, because I can't!

Re: SPEAKING OF COT ask_aboutcoffee May 10 2009, 21:44:24 UTC

I'm planning on wearing a slutty vintage morning suit, if it's any help.

Back to all threads