Um... help?

[ask_arealdoctor]

Sorry to interrupt, but if anyone's around could you possibly come down to the morgue? That noise you're hearing is all the LOCKED drawers slamming open and there are dead people crawling out and I'm trying to push them all back in and pile things against the doors but I'm running out of chairs and boxes and HOW MANY DEAD PEOPLE ARE DOWN HERE

Comments

[ask_captainjack]

We didn't have a Myfanwy when Alex was in charge.

He was strict. In a sexy way. Funny story, he wouldn't let us have a goldfish.

I know, can you believe it?

So, I was on him every day, "Alex, for fuck's sake can't we have a

SHIT IANTO DUCK!

[ask_captainjack]

GET OFF MY PLANE!

[ask_aboutcoffee]

TIE

TIE ON FIRE

[ask_captainjack]

STOP

DROP

ROLL TOWARDS ME

[ask_aboutcoffee]

OW these zombie bits are sharp.

Damn, I really liked that tie.

[ask_arealdoctor]

Good drill, Jack! Did you learn that in the War?

[ask_captainjack]

Yes! We were always on fire for some reason or other!

[ask_captainjack]

I've pulled the fire extinguisher from the wall!

HOLD STILL AND I'LL USE THE END TO BEAT THE FLAMES OUT

[ask_arealdoctor]

If we make a Molotov out of one of the formaldehyde bottles, we can run to the door, throw it, and lock them all in the morgue!

We'd lose the lot, but... what do you think, Jack?

[ask_captainjack]

YOU HAD ME AT MOLOTOV, sweetheart.

[ask_arealdoctor]

RIGHT. Back everyone up toward the door! I'm going for the bottles!

*BLAM*

Don't forget Max!

[ask_captainjack]

I'VE GOT THERESA UNDER MY ARM

HE'S STRUGGLING

HE PROBABLY WANTS TO SHOOT SOMETHING

NO BOY! YOUR PAWS ARE TOO FAT FOR THE TRIGGER.

[ask_aboutcoffee]

MAX!

COME!

Ew, put that down, you don't know where it's been.

FIRE WHEN READY, MARTHA!

[ask_arealdoctor]

RIGHT!

COME ON, GWEN!

IS EVERYONE OUT?

THREE

TWO

ONE

*BOOM*

[ask_aboutcoffee]

Wow.

That's definitely going in this year's top-ten explosions reel.

[ask_captainjack]

I MEAN, GET OFF MY BUTLER!