Wouldn't it be so cool if they couldn't get anyone to do it?

[apeygirl]

As we all know, 50 Shades is my second most nurtured pet hate (Scientology's first, obviously), so I can't help but react with glee when it gets dissed. Emma Watson gave viciously British side-eye to the very idea that she would be in such a film.

Comments

[lacylaces]

How is she even deciding who should be in this movie? I mean what is she basing her choices on?

Emma Watson would make a terrible Ana, she couldn't possibly be insipid and annoying enough.

I agree she is overrating the awesomeness of these two characters? Is she trying to find a lesser known actors to play Christian?

According to US Weekly, the author, E L James doesn’t want to cast Ian Somerhalder who desperately wants it. Wow! Her loss. She might actually get some butts in the chairs to see this if he were cast. He's very popular. He is super hot, plays mean, mysterious, and tortured very sexily. I think he would bring much needed depth to the character, he totally did with Damon

[apeygirl]

God, her loud subconscious! I'm just E.L. James never looked up the word before writing it. She has given me many giggles with her ignorance.

I remember reading the first four chapters and then shaking my head, wondering why the hell this thing was so popular. I still haven't finished reading it. I even tried for the sake of writing a crack parody and found it too exhausting to get through.

You're a braver woman than I if you can get through this trilogy. In the end, I just trolled tumblr's busting on it for LULZ. Be sure to post anything you find particularly hilarious... or creepy. I've already heard about him leering about his fetus daughter enjoying their pregnant sex.

"I think she likes sex already."

[lacylaces]

One of my bffs from college begged me to read them so she could have someone to talk to about them.

I have to confess that in spite of Ana and EL James' writing, I found myself sucked into the first book. I think it's because I was listening to the audio and I loved the narrator. She makes it very entertaining.

It came across to me like a wanna be Harlequin Presents and old school romance with the billionaire and the naive virgin, which made me nostalgic.

I chose audio because actually reading her writing would have been more pain than I could bear. I'm on hold for now because I'm checking it out from the library, and surprisingly, they are still in high demand. But I will pass on anything else I discover.

What, the what!?? They're both crazy talking about their future child like that. Is that in book 3?

[apeygirl]

I think so. I was following a tumblr that likes to put up the worst quotes from all and another that likes to correct her bad grammar and a few others before I got exhausted. I think this book has inspired more hateblogs than any other in history.... maybe even Twilight

[black_panda_ops]

1. the GIFs make this post

[apeygirl]

"I have no idea if either of these speaks passible english, but I don't think that is really a prerequisite given the material."

BWAH-HAH-HAH!!!!!

Honestly, I would LOVE if the movie decided that this wasn't a romance and was really depicting a narcissistic billionaire taking advantage of an innocent, nubile mental patient.

I do think the casting of the girl might not matter, though. I mean, KStew was a cipher and Twilight still raked it in. With self-insert fantasy stories, it's best to cast a woman as bland as possible so the audience can easily self-insert.

(see The Oatmeal's astute analysis here: http://theoatmeal.com/story/twilight)

But Christian Grey is going to have to be very appealing to get away with the abusive shit and still have females (and select males) sighing over him. Obviously, I'd like Christian Bale to get it and play him as Patrick Bateman...

[purple_moon123]

lol!!
I'm shocked, shocked that more actors and actresses aren't clamoring for this epic part of cinematic history.

[apeygirl]

I know!!! This is the porn that made porn legit and shit! But it's still porn. No one can forget that.

While I'm here, I must mourn briefly that this POS gets the distinction of women admitting we have a porn (it's called erotica and romance novels). I wouldn't mind so much if a well-written work with a good plot had become so viral. But this shit? Really, World?

Am still waiting for this awful book to get the thrashing it so richly deserves.

[purple_moon123]

Everyone likes porn but jfc!!! This is just so bad. I haven't read it but I did a few snips here and there because everyone was ranting about how epically bad this was and that's all it took for me to go: "Are you FUCKING kidding me!!!" I still don't get how people liked this shit!!

[apeygirl]

I know. And this isn't even just about the Twilight fic thing. There's another fic turned smutty book that got really popular and, though I haven't read it, I hear no complaints about the writing. If that one had made its way into the cultural zeitgeist, then I probably wouldn't care much. But this shit? Makes me lose hope for our gender.

[frelling_tralk]

LOL Haven't read them myself, but yeah I don't get the author's problem with Ian Somerhalder. I am embarrassed for him and how desperately he wants the part (why), but in all fairness it does seem like the kind of role that he would be very good at, so there's no reason to be opposed to him if he's that thirsty for the role. As you say, it's not like A-List stars with decent careers are going to be lighing up to appear in a soft-core porn trilogy...

[apeygirl]

That's the gist of it. The fact that it's a trilogy at all is even a stretch as I hear it was heavily padded to drag it out to three books. Honestly, romance novels in general don't always make for successful movies. They end up on Lifetime or Hallmark staring C-list actors or worse... I think Leann Rhimes did a Nora Roberts movie once. The only reason this book is getting mainstream attention is because it essentially went viral, much like its mama, Twilight. History is not going to remember this as a great work and almost everyone knows it's Twilight fanfic.

How hard is it going to be for Stewart and Pattinson to ever be taken seriously after Twilight? They are going to have to work their way up again, really. This one might even have a worse effect.

[purple_moon123]

She should count her lucky stars that somebody wants to do this.

[apeygirl]