alrighty.

i...REALLY hate myself. i dont know why i cant do anything right. or anything for that matter.i dont know why im even here. im useless. completely fucking useless...

UGH

...fuck.

i really fucking hate myself.

So. i've met this girl Lucille. asked her out, took me WAYYYY too long to do that ( Read more... )

have you ever fealt like there is absolutely nothing you can do to make life easy.

its pretty amazing what comes out when i think no one is paying attention ( Read more... )

alot of shit has happened man. maybe im stupid. maybe im doomed to make self destructive decisions. i dont know. i know that i would give almost anything to be okay. to be normal, to feel like i belong ( Read more... )

i hate this. i hate it all. my job, my life. the way things are going with my mom and steven. my life (friends, family, school, work, even play) is just falling apart in a blur of booze, marijuana and videogames. i hate everyone. and i really cant stand being around myself. i would leave if it werent for the fact that i am stuck with me. ( Read more... )

in retrospect, everything is shitty. and its a really good thing that i never got a chance to have a relationship with stephanie. i know how i am and so does she, i would just end up fucking things up. i mean, i've got the best record, 3/3. i'm batting a million and screwing everyone up along the way. steph and i have too much of a friendship ( Read more... )

For a very long time the question has been whether or not im crazy. I've wanted to know why im crazy and how can i fix it? what is REALLY wrong with me? why can't i be happy? why cant i relax? Every fucking question leads to WHY? why am i crazy? why am i not happy? why can't i be happy? here's another question, why have i spent my whole life ( Read more... )

im so sick and tired of trying to be a good person only to have to eat every word or kind gesture. sure, i fuck up once in a while, but who doesnt? is being human such a crime that i should be condemned to a life of loneliness? fuck it. i'll just have to be EMO.

happy fucking new years.