So the visit is off for now. But that isn't what worries me. It's her, she's in a bad way, and it scares me. Deep down I know she'll get through this. But the operation, and then walking again. She shouldn't have had to come visit, it should have been me going there. I keep thinking that if I had done things differently in life, been more ( Read more... )

It always feels wrong to crawl into bed without her. I hate sleeping, knowing that she isn't there, that she won't be when I wake up. I would give anything at all, to be with her, even if only for one night, one peaceful sleep together. If only I could be as entertaining as the others are around her. I hope she is sleeping well.

I don't know how my love can ever enjoy my company. We don't have as much to talk about as some of her old friends do. Suppose it doesn't help when I don't always speak what is on my mind, I can't find nothing to talk about other times. I can't babble nonsense like most. Yet she still wants to be with me as much as ever. It just eludes me, how I, ( Read more... )

The nightmares are back..

Each of us is a puppet,
some of us just have
more strings that the other.

Alright, I would like to know who this anon poster is. The one that keeps posting poems and other things that I continue to delete. And I don't mean Pate.

I guess eq has lost it's appeal. And I went to all those hours of spell casting to upgrade Hiryu for nothing. I spent last night just walking around, talking to people and such. I am not sure whether or not I want to stay. I seen a picture of a couple I know on the game, seeing his wife, a friend of mine just made it all the worse. I suppose she is ( Read more... )

Age is half spiritual

Today was the last straw. I do not believe I have ever been this angry. But I now have a new perspective and see things far clearer than I previously ever had. I am beginning to understand the purpose and the reason behind my exile to siberia.

I promised myself I would not stay up this late again.
I wonder if I can make it into work in a few hours.
It was a valiant try.
Why do you always make everyone worry?
Sleep love, forever sleep.