Comments | adam_epp: Another short story

adam_epp

Another short story

Jan 27, 2009 23:51

Hmm, I shouldn't have written this. I should have been writing an essay. I don't understand this inspiration that seems only to strike when other matters are so much more pressing than fanfiction.

I'm still waiting for any inspiration to write essays to strike whenever I read any poetry. I suspect I may need to wait a long time for that.

Title: ( Read more... )

Comments 7

vesperh January 28 2009, 14:04:43 UTC

Oh, poor Hisana. I don't even like her, but she's a lot more sympathetic as a wandering, unhappy spirit.

This is a really, really nice piece, Adam. The language is evocative, the images are well-chosen, you show off some understanding of physics, and the connection between Rukia and her dead sister is interesting.

This is very pretty and I really like it:
She once sat on that futon. Long ago, she shared her first kiss there. Now she cannot feel the futon, but at one time, she sat there, anxious and excited, confused and content, loving and loved.

Great job!

adam_epp January 30 2009, 21:37:23 UTC

Thank you, I'm glad you like it. I do try to improve my writing in any way I can. I'm always happy to hear from you.

sequora January 30 2009, 00:52:57 UTC

Ohhh, how sad for Hisana. But you do bring up a good point that I forgot concerning Bleach. After the soul dies, where do they go? Every, what was it, 75 years (?) they re-incarnate right? Maybe I have that wrong. Either way, this story just brings back memories from SS arc (I miss this arc) and that horrible first movie where they talked about souls being lost and stuck between SS and the living ( ... )

adam_epp January 30 2009, 21:40:56 UTC

Hmm, I was under the impression that souls re-incarnate immediately after they die (I "forgot" that when I wrote this). But I like the idea of Hisana being a ghost, seeing as how she died before seeing her sister. She seems the sort to have ghostly regret.

Thanks for another comment!

(The comment has been removed)

adam_epp January 30 2009, 21:47:55 UTC

Ohh, you're right. I wouldn't have picked up on that trend if you hadn't pointed it out.

Wow, and thanks for the praise. I'm happy to have touched a chord with you. I'm not so sure about my writing style as I'm still developing it, but thanks.

(By the way, I haven't replied to your PM's yet since I'm still waiting for your package to arrive. I haven't forgotten about you, no worries).

laurie_bunter February 10 2009, 16:01:24 UTC

Sorry for the late comment. *hides head in shame*

Anyway, I re-read it again. I think I told you it reminded me of Einstein's Dreams, the bits about time. And that's not necessarily a bad thing, because I love Einstein's Dreams.

I'm still not sure about Hisana being a ghost, but then it's probably Kubo's fault for not showing how the other side of the reincarnation process works. Because he hasn't killed off a Shinigami yet -- grr! -- we have yet to see how souls in Soul Society end up in babies. Maybe when someone dies in SS some of them do linger on as pluses. Perhaps its the strength of this fic... you get to flesh this out. I wonder if Kubo's ideas will mirror this scenario...

You mention the moonflowers. XD Is this before, or after, Spartydragon made her comic? The sentence "Moonflowers! They make excellent tea" just jumped back out of my mind from nowhere.

Her death pruned the joy away from the cherry blossoms. What a beautiful, bittersweet thought. Hmmm.

Is okay adam_epp February 10 2009, 22:06:04 UTC

I'm not really trying to sell Hisana as a ghost. I went with the image of her being one since I found it appealing. Not sure how well it worked, but I wrote the story with another interpretation in mind, with Hisana's ghost as a metaphor for memories of Hisana that linger inside her friends, family, and the various places she had been to and objects she had touched ( ... )