most all of the entries here are getting "friend protected" - if you wanna read, just drop me a comment here or add me to your friends' list and i'll add you. there's no real critera for being added, so don't feel shy if you just stumbled by.

i wish everything was different.

i am so so tired.

---Current ( Read more... )

it's hard, when you've known for so so long that you just aren't right. but you can't name it, or fully describe it. and the whole world thinks you are just dumb as fuck, or crazy. but you know - deep in your soul - that there is something wrong with you. and it isn't just "depression" (or at least not the way that everyone thinks of it) or ( Read more... )

i'm so tired of my blog. i'm making it look just like my lj. design bores me. i feel like i'm plowing through code and i'm hating it. i don't know what happened, i used to love it ( Read more... )

Mel told me I had to bring back my livejournal. And in my world, Mel gets what Mel wants. heehee ( Read more... )

i cycle. not on a bike. i cycle in between the good and the bad and the unbearable. today is unbearable. i just sleep because it's easier than dealing with myself ( Read more... )

I used to could say "A year ago I was completely independent and self-sufficent". Now that year has bled into 2 and is well on it's way to bleeding through 3. And here I am just wandering aimlessly through my life ( Read more... )

i spend way too much time online. and i think i'd feel better about it if i felt i was actually doing something - but i'm not and i don't. i just surf randomly and circularly - and then i wonder where my day went ( Read more... )

so, i don't really know what i want to do with this space. i have a domain and a weblog, but it gets old, you know? it's all about design and linking friends and all that bs that makes this whole writing thing less fun. but it's my own fault for letting it get to me ( Read more... )