~Someone~ seems to have flipped the tunnels ~upside down~. I am just ~glad~ I had a ~spare~ coffin on the wall so I'll have ~somewhere~ to sleep tonight...although it's a bit of a ~climb~ to get to. I wonder if I'll be able to fall ~asleep~ upside down like a ~bat~.

I curl up to take a nice ~nap~ in my coffin, and when I ~wake~ up, ~half~ of campus has been ~destroyed~ again. What happened? I don't suppose anyone was ~killed~. That would be too ~fortunate~.

[[ooc: Somebody is cranky after being woken up from a week-long nap and finding out he missed out on the carnage destruction excitement.]]

i feeel strangse tyoepinf is veryhaerd awt thw miment
ithinwk i will sstaty insude iuntuil i feel noermal agaeiun

[[ooc: Backdated to shortly after the pop quiz. Undertaker failed the quiz and is now feeling very heavy. He will be curled up inside his coffin until it wears off.]]

It is almost ~December~, and that means frostbite and influenza and ~Christmas~! I have ~already~ begun making presents. If anyone has any ~special~ requests, let me know. We should all spread the ~joy~ and ~happiness~ of the Christmas season!

I do not ~kill~ people. I've always been very ~patient~ waiting for ~customers~. I haven't been this long without ~burying~ someone since I started my ~career~. I am ~bored~ and rather ~perplexed~ as to why all of you are so ~healthy~. Really, almost half a ~year~ and not ~one~ person has ~died~, not even from a ~freak~ accident. You really should ( Read more... )

Does anyone know ~what~ sort of ~creature~ a 'synthetic' is? I need to ~find~ and ~skin~ one for a ~guest~ of mine...
and please, if you know, either ~write~ it or ~speak up~. I am having a little trouble ~hearing~ today...

Do to the ~number~ of people here that seem to enjoying ~dying~, ~pretending~ to be dead, or lying around as if in a ~death-like~ state on campus, I would to offer my ~services~ once more. I can build you a ~top quality~, custom-sized coffin or urn, arrange a ~final~ resting place, and even design a ~tombstone~ for any that wish. The only ~cost~ is ( Read more... )

...
...
http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2008/01/080128-ghanacoffins-video-ap.html
...is Ghana ~far~ from here? I wish to make a ~pilgrimage~ there and ~witness~ these ~beauties~ with my own eyes.

The boy that ~died~ here...I need to know ~more~ about him. I would appreciate ~any~ information about him, especially from those who knew him ~well~.

Also, your Majesty, your ~coffin~ is finished. Let me knew when you would like it ~delivered~ to you.

According to this ~map~, there are some ~caves~ along the coast...
If the ~bodies~ are being tossed into the ~ocean~, they'd probably end up ~there~.
Either ~that~, or they are being ~buried~ in the ~forest~. Must check to see if any soil has been disturbed there.

On a ~happier~ note, I have received my first official ~commission~ since my arrival. I ( Read more... )