John Carradine stars as a doctor who brings a bunch of people with psychological problems to his creepy house to “cure” them. What he’s really doing is taking out their pituitary glands and using them to keep his human guinea pig from aging. A drifter (Myron Healey) who is wanted for murder stumbles upon the house and Carradine blackmails him ( Read more... )

Well, here’s one of the worst pieces of vomit I’ve seen in some time. Just when you think they can’t find a horror subgenre more annoying than Found Footage, along comes Unfriended. The footage in this one isn’t “Found”, it’s just all shown on someone’s computer. You can even see a mouse arrow clicking on various video clips and going back and ( Read more... )

U.S. Seals is a cheap Nu Image actioner that reminded me a bit of the old Delta Force knock-off movies of the ‘90s. I guess the inspiration for this one was Navy Seals. Instead of Charlie Sheen, Michael Biehn, and Bill Paxton, we get a lot of no-name guys with not a whole lot of personality, screen presence, or charisma ( Read more... )

I freely admit that I rented Under the Skin just to see Scarlett Johansson naked. Director Jonathan Glazer probably knew that Scarlett’s assets were the main attraction, and he goes out of his way to make the experience about as uncomfortable as it possibly could’ve been. No matter how sexy the idea of Scarlett Johansson playing an alien who ( Read more... )

Ever since I saw Jaws 3-D in the theater as a kid, Dennis Quaid has been my boy. And from there, Quaid went on to star in some of my favorite movies of all time like Dreamscape and Innerspace. He’s worked with such directors as Mike Nichols and Steven Soderbergh and even starred in a few guilty pleasures along the way (G.I. Joe: The Rise of ( Read more... )

Olimpio (Pippo Franco) is a bumbling knight who returns home to his sexy, but promiscuous wife (Karin Schubert). However, when she won’t give it up to him, he runs off. Soon, he gets the hots for the miller’s wife, and since she’s played by European sex symbol, Edwige (Your Vice is a Locked Room and Only I Have the Key) Fenech, it’s hard to blame ( Read more... )

UNDER CAPRICORN (1949) **

Under Capricorn was an atypical film for director Alfred Hitchcock. It’s a period costume drama rather than the thriller you’d normally associate with The Master of Suspense. And it’s not a particularly good costume drama either ( Read more... )

Hulk Hogan stars in a rare turn in an R rated action flick. Hogan plays “Hardball” Cutter. And no, he’s not a moil. He’s a mercenary sent on “Operation: Shamrock” with his new smart aleck partner. They get duped into helping some IRA terrorists and The Hulkster gets some payback by blowing up their shipment of weapons. The bad guy doesn’t ( Read more... )

Jean Claude Van Damme is one of the all-time action greats. From Bloodsport to Timecop, the man made some of the most entertaining action films of the ‘80s and ‘90s. His DTV output started out a bit spotty, but if films like Assassination Games and 6 Bullets (not to mention Universal Soldier: Day of Reckoning, which is reviewed in this column) ( Read more... )

Here’s yet another ass-kicker from Liam Neeson. It’s a bit different than the usual Neeson fare though as it’s more in the Hitchcock tradition. Of course, Neeson still gives dudes beatdowns like he always does, so it’s still basically the same old shit, but with a slightly different flavor ( Read more... )