(no subject)

[smokedamage]

i keep myself busy to avoid the feelings of sorrow. Anything i can do to avoid it. That's dumb. I'll fish for CDs, i'll sleep, i'll watch tv, i'll sing, i'll write. Anything so that i don't consciously have to feel what my heart feels. The weight of a lost love.

Sigh.

I'm angry that after warning me not to fall in love with her, that she went on and got me to fall. Everything's a contradiction with her.