it's been a little more than three years since the last time i wrote here. sad to say that nothing much has changed. or rather, nothing that i used to want to change about myself and my situation has changed. pathetic. confined in ol' sydney town again. jobless. aimless. hiding under the covers ( Read more... )

so this has what's been bugging me lately. preachy self righteous spoilt rotten vegans. i have no problems at all with veganism or vegans for that matter. i'd say that 50% of my friends are vegan or vegetarian. each to their own, i guess. anyway. last monday we go to the east brunswick club, a pub famous for $10 vegan meals. faux cheese and bacon ( Read more... )

melbourne isn't so great this time around. after uni i'm getting the fuck outta here ( Read more... )

EAT SHIT ALL YA FUCKING CUNTS/. ARGH!

head over heels over head. that's what youssef calls me when i'm like this. why do i do this to myself? i'm leaving in two days. i can't fall for him. i can't. i can't ( Read more... )

sam and i had heroin the other night. she'd done it before but this was my first time. i thought it would be such a powerful experience. but i just felt like i was really really stoned but not tripping. all the sounds sounded louder and clearer. i felt like everything was relatively okay. we were still angry but we talked in a more rational way ( Read more... )

i am having a crisis. this year, i have been called naive twice. by the same person. by a teacher who enjoys boring pretentious minimalist monochrome canvases done by artists like yves klein (a blue canvas......wooopdeedooo). BUT STILL. there is no doubt that i am struggling with my definition of what art is. and i always jump to conclusions ( Read more... )

had a panic attack the other morning. i woke up for work and i tried to take out my piercings and my face was stark white. even my lips were white. my knees were weak, i couldn't stand. i couldn't even lift my arms. i went all dizzy and fainted. then i got up and put my clothes on. i couldn't manage to remove my piercings, that was too much of an ( Read more... )

phones off. they're fucking.

i'm back in hong kong. i am still unemployed. still bored. still angry. still hating everyone. hating people more than i did in sydney, actually. feeling more ugly and fat than ever. coming back has yet again proven to me that most people are fucking cunts. people don't give a shit. which makes me want to be more of a self centred bitch, because ( Read more... )