Prepare yourself, the mushy shit begins again until the end of the book...

Nov 11, 2008 15:21

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

EDWARD: Hey, you all right?

ALICE: She’ll probably faint again. I swear she has to at least once a chapter or Stephenie Meyer doesn’t meet her damsel in distress quota.

STEPHENIE MEYER: I love writing these books for all the young girls out there who want to lay around waiting to be rescued by men!

BELLA: I hear a strange sound. Oh! That sound is me. Stephenie uses this “something happened and it confused me until I realized I did it” form of first-person writing a little too much.

ALICE: Edward, you should slap her.

READERS: ... I like where she’s going with this.

EDWARD: It’s okay my darling, I’ll protect you!

BELLA: Those vampires are going to eat those ton of people!

EDWARD: Yeah, they do that.

BELLA: Oh, holy crap, Edward, it’s you! OH I’VE MISSED YOU MY GLITTERING ADONIS.

EDWARD: We are safe and together! I love you!

BELLA: I LOVE YOU MORE.

READERS: I have not missed this.

ALICE: Ugh, neither have I. BRB, stealing another car.

MORE STUFF: *happens, it’s boring, mostly has to do with Bella drinking coke*

(later, once they fly back to wherever)

ESMA: Edward, I could kill you right now.

EDWARD: My bad.

ROSALIE: Hi Bella. Sorry I hated you in the last book, I like you now. My bad.

CHARLIE: What the... BELLA? WTF EDWARD?! GTFO, you ass.

BELLA: Dad, be mad at ME.

CHARLIE: I’M GETTING TO THAT.

EDWARD: It’s cool, I’ll just take Bella up to bed and leave. I’ll stay close though and may or may not watch watch her sleep.

CHARLIE: Dick.

END OF CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

END NOTE: *isn't here for this chapter... ha*

Back to chapter one!

new moon recap, twilight recap, twilight

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