The Long Road, Part 3/?

[scowilily]

Title: The Long Road
Author: scowilily
Rating: PG
Pairing: Alan/Kevin
Summary: The love story of Alan Bradley. AU
Author's Note: Hoo-boy. Alan throws himself where angels fear to tread, and so do I. I've rewritten this piece two or three times; I'm still not completely happy with it. But "...we must move forward, not backward, upward not forward, and always

Comments

[grey_sw]

Fantastic. The scene at the beach was perfect, as was the idea of them all playing eight-ball. Alan's feelings are so confused and raw here, and the contrast between the domestic scenes and what's going on in his head really captures what it's like to fall for a friend who isn't willing to reciprocate. I also liked Quorra in this -- she comes across as being quite strong and two-dimensional despite her naivete. I cannot wait to read her and Alan's adventures on the Grid!

I especially love the subtle insight into Kevin's reintegration with Clu. The apple scene is quietly brilliant, very well done!

[scowilily]

>>the contrast between the domestic scenes and what's going on in his head really captures what it's like to fall for a friend who isn't willing to reciprocate.<<

Yeah, Alan's tragic flaw is always his preoccupation with himself. You almost feel sorry for him because he honestly doesn't mean any harm and he tries hard to reach out. But now it's time for the reality check... Kevin's lived in a whole 'nother world, and we're gonna see more of that in the next part (hopefully).

The apple/nutella was also a call-out to certain posts on the kinkmeme ::coughcough::

I'm so glad you're still with me :D Yay!!!

[grey_sw]

I did notice the nutella thing. Hard not to, really. :D

I couldn't help but imagine Clu inside Kevin's mind going arrrrrggh apples I remember being ~~made~~ and I hate you and I want to throw things off tables, and all the while Kevin is like dude, come on, we are on an outing, could you please not make me act like a crazy dictator at the concession stand at the zoo?

[scowilily]

Crazy cute. I could not have put the Clu/Kevin byplay better! <3

One of the aspects that made part three so difficult to write was 'how to portray Kevin.' I wanted to stick with Alan's POV, so naturally the whole thing had to be less obvious than breaking into a Kevin-Clu back-and-forth (as much as I SO wanted to at points). Walking that line between cohesive Kevin and conflicted Kevin was tough.

It's gratuitous pleasure to have that Clu-Kevin wish fulfilled by someone else reading! B)

[cryspeaches]

This continues to be gorgeous, and when I grow up, I want to write like you.

<3

Alan's emotions in this are so raw and so rich, I just wanna cry, which I take as evidence of your mastery.

I LOVED the nutella and the apple, it was a great fandom nod that didn't distract from the story in the least. Major kudos for that!

Looking forward to reading more. Thanks so much for sharing this.

[scowilily]

Okay, seriously, I love you. Your comments fill me with warm, fuzzy feelings of happiness. Hopefully this isn't too creepy O_o

I will come back to these comments for future, inevitable "oh-my-god-what-am-i-doing" crises (as happens pretty much whenever I write long plotty chappies). So thank you!!!

[cryspeaches]

pft, nothing creepy about it. I love you, you love me, let's get married. XD

I hope it does help you overcome these crises, because I want to read more, and I really do believe you know what you're doing, even if you don't know that you know, you know? :D

[ani_coolgirl]

OMG YOU WROTE MORE.

I am very pleased with this installment. Finally, some smoochy times (coupled with even more delicious angst, yum)! I can't wait to see where this goes. Keep it up, you're awesome!

[scowilily]

I lol-ed at your 'finally smoochy times.' Oh my dear there will be more. Maybe not right away... but eventually XD (There's a reason why I didn't post this to kinkmeme; no one would be patient enough for it hahaha)

Anyhow, thanks for the prodding and encouragement <3

[dislex1a]

Ohhh. Honestly the more I read of this the more I fall in love with it. I loved all the little hints you give as to Kevin's inner turmoil, but I love how Alan finally gets it into his head that he's been such a self-absorbed idiot.

Like everyone else has said, i really liked the little fandom details as well. The apple thing in particular was beautiful.

And, oh, the way Kevin and Alan play off each other is just heartbreaking. Can't wait to see what happens on the Grid now!

[scowilily]

>>Alan finally gets it into his head that he's been such a self-absorbed idiot... The apple thing in particular was beautiful.<<

Yeah, there's the notion here (underplayed imo, but there) that Alan's looking for fuel for his addictions... work, coffee, alcohol, Kevin... while Kevin himself is trying to limit his to what's necessary to remain whole/sane. I was rewatching Requiem for a Dream at some point, so I blame that.

And, yes, there's plenty of Grid action coming up. I'm hoping to do my own slant on it, though.

Oh! and I should mention: I read your piece on cake. I've hardly had any time between the ski trip and getting sick (and writing omg), but I had a lot of fun reading that. There's the "the cake is a lie" thing, and there's also this comic, which I'd just read recently:

The God of Cake

So I was pretty ecstatic about the whole cake-icing hotness. Just thought you should know :D

[dislex1a]

Yeah, there's the notion here (underplayed imo, but there) that Alan's looking for fuel for his addictions... while Kevin himself is trying to limit his to what's necessary to remain whole/sane.

That is... wow I am in love the idea of it! I think it just adds that extra little layer of angst (which makes this chapter all the more wonderful) to those little moments when Kevin obviously can't help himself (also? that kissing scene? SO HOT). Ouch ouch ouch. Oh, boys.

So looking forward to the next chapter now! LOL no pressure :)

So I was pretty ecstatic about the whole cake-icing hotness. Just thought you should know :D

*shuffles feet* Aww, thank you so much for saying so! I'm glad it worked for you :D Also, yay for Hyperbole and a Half! Loving the wolf pack comic at the moment, but the God of Cake never fails to crack me up.

(I think I missed have missed adding you on the friending meme back on Tron Slash... friends?)

[scowilily]

Friends!! :D

>>to those little moments when Kevin obviously can't help himself<<

Hehehe, now Alan just needs to figure that part out (and the reasons behind it).

ps. Can't wait to read more of your tasty awesomeness! I will be watching XD

[silver_autumn]

Wow... You know I get so used to reading small fanfics that I forget what a real story should be like. I was halfway through reading this chapter when I thought, "Wait...there's more going one here. The author isn't just gunna have a quick 'Alan-falls-into-Kevin's-arms' ending

[scowilily]

Oh I am so hugging you! hugshugshugs I would glomp too but the image I get from that is NSFW, so best leave that alone.It fills me with joy to hear love for plottiness. I do try, but sometimes I wonder (a) isitworkingisitworking or omg is it all In. My. Head. (b) amitheonlyonewhocaresaboutit because, yes, I love pr0n as much as the next person, but I can't just write pr0n. It doesn't happen. It, like, transforms and shit. And then there's the crisis of overcomplicatedstopstopbutwait

[silver_autumn]

Glomp and hug away! :D
I usually try and find stories with plot but they're kinda rare so I just take what I can find. I do like pwp and the like but those stories that I watch out for are the deep plotty ones.

So another quick question- do you have a set number of chapters? Just curious!

[scowilily]

Set number of chapters? Um. Well, I did have a set number of chapters at one point, but I've rewritten the story since... There's probably another two to four parts, depending on how difficult it is to write-in the epilogue I have mind.