Hey hey boys and girls. Sorry it's been so long since I last posted but it has been one hell of a year so far. However I won't bore you with my lame ass excuses for letting my journal entries lapse and instead shall just get on with it ( Read more... )

First off I want to start by apologising to all of my rabid regular readers. I know it’s been some time since my last journal but the truth is I simply haven’t known how to put things into words lately. Too many thoughts swirling around the old brain and not enough of an ability to process them efficiently. What with me turning 32 last month (I ( Read more... )

To my dearest N.L.,

This is probably one of the hardest and most difficult letters I have ever had to write and knowing that you may never even read it makes the task none the easier.

I was damaged when I was young and unprepared to defend against the things that broke me, and then further events conspired against me to finish the job so by the time  ( Read more... )

'Lo guys and babydolls! Hard as it might be to believe I'm actually struggling to find words to get me started tonight. Much of the reasoning for that is because of what day it is. I can't quite wrap my own head around the fact that today marks twelve years since I miscarried my son. As always this is the worst day of the entire year and one that ( Read more... )

What's this you say? A second journal entry in as many days? It's an Easter miracle! But no, not so, for I am hardly as pure as Jesus H. Christ (and incidentally what does the H stand for? I wonder if it's short for holy, hmmmm) nor would I want to be. I can't imagine Jesus on his days off from preaching to the masses sitting in a mud hut and ( Read more... )

Oh for fuck's sake! The new year and appropriately apocalyptic 2012 has got off to a typical start. Barely into the month of February and I have had a meltdown, and I'm not talking a little one. I shall endeavour to explain if I can.

Tonight, while in the bath, I cried. I was being held gently by the water, feeling nothing in particular and out of ( Read more... )

Evening all! I hope you don't mind if I skip my customary preamble and get right down to the nitty gritty tonight. Frankly I'm in no mood for levity and just want to get this out of the way.

The bloody silly season is fast approaching and I am no more looking forward to it than I normally do. Despite my repeated pleas to leave it alone my mother ( Read more... )

Morning everyone. Yes it's dark outside and we're still hours away from sunrise but technically speaking it is morning what with it being after midnight and all so I am correct in greeting you so. Forgive me for being such a grump but once again lovey shite day has descended upon us and I am forced to sit on the sidelines, a solitary observer. What ( Read more... )

Happy annual gift giving time one and all! Hope you got plenty of good gifts and minimal numbers of poor ones like socks and hankies and stuff (unless of course you like that sort of thing in which case never mind!). My family came through for me with some choice dvds and two brand new pairs of Converse high tops which I love no end. The only ( Read more... )