Stolen from
tricksterquinn:
Pick up the nearest book to you.
Turn to page 45. The first sentence describes your sex life in 2012.
Oh holy god:
"Aunt Petunia found a few moldy blankets in the second room and made up a bed for Dudley on the moth-eaten sofa," from Harry Fucking Potter and the Sorcerer's Motherfucking Stone.
That's it. I never want to have sex again.