To Christina: I feel your pain
So lately I've been incredibly depressed. Been hating the job, wishing I had more time, thinking I'm wasting my life and my talents here.
So I decided to not think like that anymore.
Before I get into the changes, I want to confess my incredibly embarrassing blowup at one of my kids. They're 7. We were in class yesterday (er, Thursday) and they weren't looking at me. One of them said, in English, "Shut up." I threw open the door, planning to kick her out, told her off, and stormed out like I was the 7 year old.
The Japanese teacher and Chiyoko went in and finished my class for me. I was so burnt out that I just couldn't take it anymore.
Today was better (Friday). It was busy, yes, but I decided to not be miserable.
Mind you, I can't always do this. And granted, it may not last. But gosh darn it, Gregory deserves a happy girlfriend.
So here we go.
I'm 25 now. That's not too bad.
I feel I'm wasting my time. No, I'll not waste, but do.
I'm mean sometimes. So I'll stop being so.
I hate myself. So I'll stop that too.
I have an excuse for everything. So? I'm creative. (See?)
I'm frustrated with Japan because people follow precedence so blindly that they can't see logic when it hits them in the face if it's never been done before. So...I'll just do things my way and change things/people as I go.
I've decided to be proactive girl.
I've found a FedEx/Kinkos in Tokyo where I will scan my new drawings and such. I will sell them at shows. Since I no have a lot of pieces with mountains, I have a theme. Which means I have something to exhibit were I to find a gaijin-friendly gallery.
I'm going to go to Inage City Hall and get free Japanese lessons and learn how to freaking READ.
I will find a drummer for crying out loud and I will have my rock band!
I'm going to market myself as a multi-media artist. I make music. I make art (granted, not the best, but it's unique to me so that's something). I write. No one else can be me for me. They can't take my music and record it for me. By the way, my dad got me a hand-held recorder for my birthday. Booyah.
Bonus: Gregory is coming to stay this weekend.
I need to look to the possibilities and act on them instead of dwelling on how much the present sucks.
So I decided to not think like that anymore.
Before I get into the changes, I want to confess my incredibly embarrassing blowup at one of my kids. They're 7. We were in class yesterday (er, Thursday) and they weren't looking at me. One of them said, in English, "Shut up." I threw open the door, planning to kick her out, told her off, and stormed out like I was the 7 year old.
The Japanese teacher and Chiyoko went in and finished my class for me. I was so burnt out that I just couldn't take it anymore.
Today was better (Friday). It was busy, yes, but I decided to not be miserable.
Mind you, I can't always do this. And granted, it may not last. But gosh darn it, Gregory deserves a happy girlfriend.
So here we go.
I'm 25 now. That's not too bad.
I feel I'm wasting my time. No, I'll not waste, but do.
I'm mean sometimes. So I'll stop being so.
I hate myself. So I'll stop that too.
I have an excuse for everything. So? I'm creative. (See?)
I'm frustrated with Japan because people follow precedence so blindly that they can't see logic when it hits them in the face if it's never been done before. So...I'll just do things my way and change things/people as I go.
I've decided to be proactive girl.
I've found a FedEx/Kinkos in Tokyo where I will scan my new drawings and such. I will sell them at shows. Since I no have a lot of pieces with mountains, I have a theme. Which means I have something to exhibit were I to find a gaijin-friendly gallery.
I'm going to go to Inage City Hall and get free Japanese lessons and learn how to freaking READ.
I will find a drummer for crying out loud and I will have my rock band!
I'm going to market myself as a multi-media artist. I make music. I make art (granted, not the best, but it's unique to me so that's something). I write. No one else can be me for me. They can't take my music and record it for me. By the way, my dad got me a hand-held recorder for my birthday. Booyah.
Bonus: Gregory is coming to stay this weekend.
I need to look to the possibilities and act on them instead of dwelling on how much the present sucks.