i want to destroy everything. im so pissed at my situation and the people around me getting on my nerves. i just want to slam my fist into someones face. that would feel amazing right now. i have way too much school to have a job at the same time, and im getting minimum wage doing dirty bitch work after spending all summer getting a cushy 10 an ( Read more... )

yo niggas i got 17 more days in this fuckin town where i dont know anyone then its back home! for 20 days then its back to huntsville! for another school year. you bet your ass im going to make those 20 days memorable. im gonna take acid and jump off a bridge. im gonna run through a field of weed naked. im goin to eat a whole pizza. im going to ( Read more... )

denton good, denton bad. i like my job doing demolition and construction on the dorms, i get 10 an hour. i've been watching margie's dog for her this weekend and its nice having a house to chill in rather than beeing cooped up in my dorm cell after work ( Read more... )

Im in Denton. I failed music theory II at SHSU and UNT is the only school that offers it during the summer. the theory classes must be taken in order, 1 before 2 before 3 before 4 and so on, and SHSU only offers 1 and 3 in the fall and 2 and 4 in the spring, so i'd be fucked if i didnt do this. i was really nervous about it, but ive got my buddies ( Read more... )

confidence! need confidence!

we've been preparing for this concert all se,ester. now it's finally over, and we just threw a huge party last night out on some orchestra dudes' land, and i totally needed that. ive been cooped up in my apartment working on my string quartet or going to classes, not really taking time to socialize. to anyone who's interested, i would be honored if ( Read more... )

so i had an privately emotional week. im a lot better now, but for some reason i would get depressed as soon as i wasnt around people anymore, sometimes crying uncontrollably. perhaps when i left or they left i would tell myself "ok theyre gone, now im alone" in my head and it would echo the way those similar words did when i broke up with nicole. ( Read more... )

i used to feel so cool, like i could be with any girl i desired. with the way things are going nowadays, it seems ive lost all confidence. its possible that i had some great opportunities recently but waited too long for some kind of signal that was never going to come. story of my life.

this is the calm jared of the future speaking to the frustrated jared of the past ( Read more... )

update ( Read more... )