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I sometimes wonder if I'm pursuing this dream with such dogged determination and desperation because I really want to or because I'm too scared to drop this one goal and embrace a world of possibilities. If i leave myself vulnerable to the chaos of freedom will I be any happier? Or lost again, as usual - always wondering and never knowing if I'm ( Read more... )

I don't want to deal I don't want this to be a difficult character building time I just want things easy I'm sick of feeling useless tired and unmotivated and it's going to be like this all the way until fucking July i need the time to kick myself back into action I can't expect to focus at all and ive just been slowly losing touch losing hope ( Read more... )

I'm in a surprisingly good mood today - though this exuberance was dampened a little when I weighed myself but that's nothing really new. I enjoyed learning bio for the first time today, and I hope this actually means I'll start remembering what I memorize. I haven't been the most productive today but somehow I'm living too far in denial to think ( Read more... )