Trying to gain control of my emotions and perspective
I am a very negative person who is pessimistic about a lot of things. I wonder how much different would my life be if I was not this way.
Last night, I let my frustration ruin my mindset. I was exercising with my friends at our weekly social run. I got frustrated that I could not keep up with my friends while they did their really fast run. I can't blame them for wanting for doing a fast run like that since they just want to train and work hard at times. Then I got frustrated as I ran by myself remembering all those negative things I hate about my body and all those things people have said to me growing up about my body (mainly all about me being fat or in some cases ugly). Those thoughts of hate of my body boiled up, and I ran harder because of it. Sadly, this use to happen regularly when I exercised by myself in the past. The problem is that after the run and thinking about all those memories or dislike of my body, it makes me irritable and frustrated for a while afterwards. I have difficulty controlling my emotions, especially my negative emotions, when that happens. I then shut myself off to everyone else as I reflected on those negative feelings. I continued to be unsocial for hours later, partly because those negative feelings still lingered but also because I did not know how to transition well into my calmer self so I can be social.
Nicole was right though last night. I need to grow up. I let my emotions control me too much (maybe it is my hormones lately too, but that is not a good excuse since I don't know if that is true or not), especially the negative feelings. I can tend to whine too much about some things that I could have more control over if I tried harder.
http://www.wikihow.com/Gain-Control-of-Your-Emotions
I did find this guide this morning, and it helped me realize again how much I let my negative emotions control me. Not everything on there is true for me, but a good chunk of it can be at times.
I have to learn to be a better person so I can be a better friend. Somehow. I don't know how I will change this mentality I have at times, but somehow I need to do it.
Last night, I let my frustration ruin my mindset. I was exercising with my friends at our weekly social run. I got frustrated that I could not keep up with my friends while they did their really fast run. I can't blame them for wanting for doing a fast run like that since they just want to train and work hard at times. Then I got frustrated as I ran by myself remembering all those negative things I hate about my body and all those things people have said to me growing up about my body (mainly all about me being fat or in some cases ugly). Those thoughts of hate of my body boiled up, and I ran harder because of it. Sadly, this use to happen regularly when I exercised by myself in the past. The problem is that after the run and thinking about all those memories or dislike of my body, it makes me irritable and frustrated for a while afterwards. I have difficulty controlling my emotions, especially my negative emotions, when that happens. I then shut myself off to everyone else as I reflected on those negative feelings. I continued to be unsocial for hours later, partly because those negative feelings still lingered but also because I did not know how to transition well into my calmer self so I can be social.
Nicole was right though last night. I need to grow up. I let my emotions control me too much (maybe it is my hormones lately too, but that is not a good excuse since I don't know if that is true or not), especially the negative feelings. I can tend to whine too much about some things that I could have more control over if I tried harder.
http://www.wikihow.com/Gain-Control-of-Your-Emotions
I did find this guide this morning, and it helped me realize again how much I let my negative emotions control me. Not everything on there is true for me, but a good chunk of it can be at times.
I have to learn to be a better person so I can be a better friend. Somehow. I don't know how I will change this mentality I have at times, but somehow I need to do it.