The days were beginning to blur for me. My limbs slowly falling asleep amidst screaming and crying and begging and bleeding. I couldn't see where one part of me started and the other began, it all just meshed together in one big swirl of black. Occasionally there would be the reprieve of screaming until I was raw and then passing out for a few hours. I'd nod on and off and those few sweet moments of unconsciousness were what I held onto. I was learning that food and water was a luxury, but that wasn't a new lesson. I'd been learning that one forever. But it just kept going on and on until I thought that maybe I just didn't exist anymore
( ... )
I watched her closely, checking for any signs that her sanity had gone for good. One of these times I'd push Faith too far and she'd break for good. Of course if that happened, I would just have to put her out of her misery, after I made her bleed some more for disappointing me. But it looked like she still had all her marbles as she slowly got off the bed
( ... )
It stung something wicked, the etching on my skin. Now I understood his little butterfly fetish. I was cocooned, trapped all the time now in that trunk. But he said I was gonna be strong again, and for some fucked up reason I believed him. If he built me back up enough I'd stab him to death, over and over and over again. I'd show him a hellish repetition. Choking back another scream as he put the bandage on it, I let my eyes wander along the patterns in the ceiling. I'd gotten good at trying to distract myself with random things
( ... )
My smile turned genuine when Faith said she wanted to learn. Part of me had been hoping she'd say no just so I could add some more bruises to her body. I moved a little further away to the edge of the bed and thought about what I was going to show her next. "Sure, you can have one. You've been very good since I let you out this time
( ... )
What the fuck? This was like some kinda sick playground of torture. My eyes widened as I took in all the little toys he had in here. Fucking bastard. He was doin' it so I'd just do whatever he told me and tow the line, like that one little reminder hangin' right over my head. Hated him so much. Wanted him to die. When he put his hand on my face and tilted me up to look at him I wanted to cry again and I had no idea why. But I could the burning behind my eyes and it pissed me off so fucking bad. I hated him
( ... )
Her fist slammed into my nose and I heard it crunch. Be careful what you ask for, you just might get it. I clutched my nose, feeling the blood pour over my fingers. It felt crooked and I knew I'd have to fix it now before it started to heal wrong. Putting one of my hands on either side of my nose, I twisted it back into place, letting out a bellow of pain. Then I turned to look at Faith
( ... )
I knew it was happening and I couldn't do anything about him. He stalked towards me, but at least this time he didn't have the murderous rage thundering behind his eyes. He kept squinting in pain from the broken nose and I almost wanted to smile, but I didn't. I wanted to be good, I didn't wanna be tied down in the trunk anymore. Didn't wanna end up in that little box. Never gonna get outta this, never gonna escape. Where was Angel
( ... )
I crouched down next to her when she finished yelling, still holding the bamboo in my hand. Should just leave her locked inside of this thing for a few hours, not take care of the feet that were already starting to swell up. "That was a very good punch. Strong, but not strong enough. If you were stronger, you wouldn't be locked inside of that
( ... )
I wanted to tell him that my punch was still strong enough to break his fucking nose, but I didn't. Instead I just laid still, like a good girl, right? Nothing I could do, I was doomed. Fucking finished. Except I never really was finished, was I? Just kept goin' on and on and on. Repetition. Hell. It was all the same thing and I barely even gasped out when he smacked me with that stupid fucking stick again. I wanted to rip it out of his hands and thrust it through his chest. I used to be able to do that. I used to be able to kill him, fucking kill him for good. Now I coudln't do shit and it just kept gettin' worse and worse
( ... )
No food? Fine. I turned my back on her and walked over to the mirror. Blood had started to dry on my face and was staining my shirt. My nose still hurt a lot, but it wasn't worse than some of the things I'd gone through as a vampire. I would heal. I wasn't sure if Faith would ever heal. She just kept pissing me off and I'd do more damage
( ... )
"I know." I said quietly, just tellin' him whatever he wanted to hear because now I couldn't even fucking walk. Fucking psychopath. Just breaking me down over and over and over again, and I wondered if I'd ever get my powers back. He was dust in the fucking wind if I did, no doubt. I'd stake him so fast it'd make his head spin. God, I missed being a slayer. Silently cursing everything I'd ever fucked up because I'd taken it all for granted. What I'd been, what I'd done, who I could've become
( ... )
I'd done too much damage again. Hadn't meant for her not to bee able to walk, I just couldn't make myself stop when she started to scream. "She locked me in one of those thing just outside of Rome. Kept me in there for days, coming back to tease me with food I couldn't reach. Drained people in front of me
( ... )
I watched him carefully as he told me yet another pointless story about his vampire whores. Darla and Dru, I was gettin' so fucking sick of hearin' about them. Not that I'd tell him that. Ever. Sick fuck probably got off on that bitch burnin' the soles of his feet every night too. Not that it mattered, he'd been a vampire then. He'd heal a lot quicker than my annoying weak human healing. God, I hated it so much. Wanted to tear all of my skin off until nothin' existed but me without him. Couldn't remember what things were like before him. Before the trunk
( ... )
So many things I wanted to do to her, but I had to hold myself back. She was close to the edge, and if I pushed too hard, I'd fail in what I was trying to accomplish. He always failed and I didn't want to be like him. I hated him, what he'd done to us. Tainted by that fucking soul, thinking he could hide who he really was. He was me, but he couldn't see it
( ... )
Choked on my ice cream when he told me to touch him. Touch him? Was this one of those 'give me head or I'll throw you in the trunk deals'? Honestly I thought he'd get it by now that I wasn't just gonna do that without biting it off. Course, things had changed in seven days. I wasn't sure I could keep tryin' to provoke him. He'd kill me eventually and maybe I just wanted to push him closer to it. Cause if he killed me, at least it'd be over. But on the other hand I really didn't wanna die. Was holdin' onto what I had left so fucking tightly. There wasn't much, but it still existed
( ... )
Hadn't expected her to wrap around me like this, but it felt very fucking nice. I brought my arm around to her back very slowly, moving my fingers as gently as I could in small circles. Knew her back was one big mess of bruises and wounds, so I had to be careful
( ... )
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