well, i guess i fucked up pretty bad
I told my mom last night that I was failing, and that my plan was to get a job, finish off the school year to get what credits I could, and then take English 4 and Government through correspondence. Then, I'd work for a year to save up at least a little money for college. She said she'd call UNT and ask if they'd accept me after that. All in all, she was really understanding about it.
But this morning, she started screeching at me, pissed off her ass about it.
Fuck anyone who tricks me like that.
And Jeremy didn't say anything when I suggested getting married and moving out like Autumn and Cody did, but I could tell he thought it was a stupid idea.
Maybe if it were any other friends who'd done it, or if no one else had done it, he might go for it.
No.
Everyone always thinks my ideas about that kind of thing are stupid.
Fucking no one ever believes. No one ever sees like I see or hopes like I hope.
It's fucking pathetic.
I wish I had the balls to run away.
And I wish Leifeste had told me himself that I'm failing his class. Stupid bastard only told Ms. Scott, and she wouldn't have told me if I hadn't been asking her about the letter about summer school (which, by the way, was stupid to send, since they don't cover the classes I'm failing).
And I know everyone in my family is going to lecture the shit out of me. I'm sure they're all pretty good at it by now. But, you know, I don't really give a fuck who I disappoint right now. I'm still going on the hope that I can make them proud later.
And I'm sure everyone is going to have a jolly fucking good time judging me, blaming it on Jeremy, saying it was inevitable or something like that.
Fuck.
Oh, and to make everything more disheartening, Jeremy's going to live in a student-only co-op in Austin when he goes to college.
I'm completely alone.
But this morning, she started screeching at me, pissed off her ass about it.
Fuck anyone who tricks me like that.
And Jeremy didn't say anything when I suggested getting married and moving out like Autumn and Cody did, but I could tell he thought it was a stupid idea.
Maybe if it were any other friends who'd done it, or if no one else had done it, he might go for it.
No.
Everyone always thinks my ideas about that kind of thing are stupid.
Fucking no one ever believes. No one ever sees like I see or hopes like I hope.
It's fucking pathetic.
I wish I had the balls to run away.
And I wish Leifeste had told me himself that I'm failing his class. Stupid bastard only told Ms. Scott, and she wouldn't have told me if I hadn't been asking her about the letter about summer school (which, by the way, was stupid to send, since they don't cover the classes I'm failing).
And I know everyone in my family is going to lecture the shit out of me. I'm sure they're all pretty good at it by now. But, you know, I don't really give a fuck who I disappoint right now. I'm still going on the hope that I can make them proud later.
And I'm sure everyone is going to have a jolly fucking good time judging me, blaming it on Jeremy, saying it was inevitable or something like that.
Fuck.
Oh, and to make everything more disheartening, Jeremy's going to live in a student-only co-op in Austin when he goes to college.
I'm completely alone.