Baka no Peiji
I've been fine, but wasn't feeling quite good the days before this. Not because I was sick though. ^^.
And oh wow, I forgot what I wanted to update about. o_o. Quite a lot of things happened before this. They aren't all that significant but, something different from the norm lah. Well, anyways, since I've forgotten about what to update about...I'll post about this one topic which I thought about yesterday (or it might've been today...).
Andrea Brocelli ► Time to Say Goodbye
Note to some people I know: This may sound familiar, and you think you're the person mentioned in here, but it might not be so. Just don't jump to conclusions and think too much. ^^ (because there were some similar cases like these which happened to me before (though not exactly the same), I won't say how many, 'cause I don't want the guy to find out that he's the one in this post and know what I was feeling throughout. :P )
I don't know how long and detailed this post will be...but I guess I'll just go with the flow.
There was this guy, Baka (a fake name, of course). I liked him, he liked me, but I knew that I couldn't be in a relationship with him because he isn't a Christian (and also because of my young age). I saw hints which he unconsciously gave out, that he was going to confess to me soon. I prepared myself to face the fact that I would be hurting him when he confesses to me. He didn't confess to me on the day I thought he would, but instead a week later. I let out a few tears when I thought I broke his heart, but after assuring words by him, stating that he wasn't hurt in any way, I stopped right at the edge of crying.
I thought we would be just friends later on, but he still acted as if I never told him that I cannot be with him. Honestly, very honestly, I actually enjoyed those times, because it gave me back the feeling that he was mine (or something like it), though he wasn't. During these times were when I was confused of the difference between two friends (of the different gender) and a couple. Do you know the difference? I didn't find out the answer, but after talking with my second brother about it, I opened my eyes fully and realised what I was doing was wrong, and confronted him once more that we cannot be together. The rest...I'll leave it up to your guessing, but yes, it went to the right path of where we became just friends. ^_^
Though we didn't become a couple, it took me a long time to get over him. Maybe about...3 months? It gave me quite an experience. I learned how sentimental I was, I learned how sensitive I was, I learned how loyal I could be, and I also learned how a type of jealousy felt. I wasn't jealous of the girl, but I became angry at how many times he mentioned her name. Yes, I didn't dislike the girl too. Oh, and I also discovered the best way for me to get over a guy. It's quite a bad method, so I won't suggest those who are experiencing break up to use it, lol. It's to think up of all the bad stuff he did and the reasons of why he isn't worth me feeling emo, jealous, hurt and so forth. Yeah, think of ALL his negative traits. It made me dislike him more, which is why the method is bad. It did help me a lot in getting over, and now after being 100% over him, all my dislike towards him disappeared, though he has been demoted from a close friend to just a normal friend, lol.
Ok, this was how I felt. I am not going to brag, not going to exaggerate anything, just completely honest. There were a lot of lies which he spoke of. That latest link will lead you to the time of where I discovered he was lying. My eyes weren't covered with my crush over him, which made me neutral towards whether he was lying or not.
Once I got the first hint that he was planning to confess, straight away I felt sad that I had to reject him, without wavering. God is definitely the most important thing in my life, and to think that I am going (if I were to say yes to his confession) to get into a relationship with a guy who isn't a Christian, is totally unimaginable, because the days would just be filled with depression, and maybe I will also be crushed with dilemma, blinded by my crush towards him. Some girls and guys have fallen out in their belief towards God because of relationships with people who don't have God in their hearts, and I didn't want anything which have the chance of disrupting my relationship with Him in the future. That is one of the reasons of why God doesn't want us to be equally yoked with a person who isn't a Christian.
I am posting about this because I am a sentimental person, lol. The reason of why I have a Livejournal and would love to keep it updated is so that I will have my memories inside it, so that when I grow older each day, I can look back and think, "Haah, that actually happened to me? Hahahaha. Hmm, maybe I remember something like that..." and all those nice or bad nostalgic feelings would come to me. I like that. ^_^. I've been less sentimental nowadays though, actually. And so, the reason of why I am posting this is so that my mind would be refreshed again of what happened in this chapter of my life of where I experienced a lot of different things for the first time.
Goodbye Baka, thank you for all the memories you gave, be it good or bad, you were the guy whom I have so far fell into the deepest crush with. ^_^
The posts which were related to him:
[ before he confessed]
[ about to remind him again]
[ he 'led' me to prayer meet]
[ mentioned as Kei]
[ in the process of getting over #1]
[ mentioned above the dashes]
[ mentioned as the last update]
I thank all those who have listened to me about all those fun, angry and sad times of me and him. I thank all those who have supported and encouraged me in the right way. I thank you, asou, Jo and Keke for listening to me blabber. XD. I thank you three, very, very much. ^_^
And oh wow, I forgot what I wanted to update about. o_o. Quite a lot of things happened before this. They aren't all that significant but, something different from the norm lah. Well, anyways, since I've forgotten about what to update about...I'll post about this one topic which I thought about yesterday (or it might've been today...).
Andrea Brocelli ► Time to Say Goodbye
Note to some people I know: This may sound familiar, and you think you're the person mentioned in here, but it might not be so. Just don't jump to conclusions and think too much. ^^ (because there were some similar cases like these which happened to me before (though not exactly the same), I won't say how many, 'cause I don't want the guy to find out that he's the one in this post and know what I was feeling throughout. :P )
I don't know how long and detailed this post will be...but I guess I'll just go with the flow.
There was this guy, Baka (a fake name, of course). I liked him, he liked me, but I knew that I couldn't be in a relationship with him because he isn't a Christian (and also because of my young age). I saw hints which he unconsciously gave out, that he was going to confess to me soon. I prepared myself to face the fact that I would be hurting him when he confesses to me. He didn't confess to me on the day I thought he would, but instead a week later. I let out a few tears when I thought I broke his heart, but after assuring words by him, stating that he wasn't hurt in any way, I stopped right at the edge of crying.
I thought we would be just friends later on, but he still acted as if I never told him that I cannot be with him. Honestly, very honestly, I actually enjoyed those times, because it gave me back the feeling that he was mine (or something like it), though he wasn't. During these times were when I was confused of the difference between two friends (of the different gender) and a couple. Do you know the difference? I didn't find out the answer, but after talking with my second brother about it, I opened my eyes fully and realised what I was doing was wrong, and confronted him once more that we cannot be together. The rest...I'll leave it up to your guessing, but yes, it went to the right path of where we became just friends. ^_^
Though we didn't become a couple, it took me a long time to get over him. Maybe about...3 months? It gave me quite an experience. I learned how sentimental I was, I learned how sensitive I was, I learned how loyal I could be, and I also learned how a type of jealousy felt. I wasn't jealous of the girl, but I became angry at how many times he mentioned her name. Yes, I didn't dislike the girl too. Oh, and I also discovered the best way for me to get over a guy. It's quite a bad method, so I won't suggest those who are experiencing break up to use it, lol. It's to think up of all the bad stuff he did and the reasons of why he isn't worth me feeling emo, jealous, hurt and so forth. Yeah, think of ALL his negative traits. It made me dislike him more, which is why the method is bad. It did help me a lot in getting over, and now after being 100% over him, all my dislike towards him disappeared, though he has been demoted from a close friend to just a normal friend, lol.
Ok, this was how I felt. I am not going to brag, not going to exaggerate anything, just completely honest. There were a lot of lies which he spoke of. That latest link will lead you to the time of where I discovered he was lying. My eyes weren't covered with my crush over him, which made me neutral towards whether he was lying or not.
Once I got the first hint that he was planning to confess, straight away I felt sad that I had to reject him, without wavering. God is definitely the most important thing in my life, and to think that I am going (if I were to say yes to his confession) to get into a relationship with a guy who isn't a Christian, is totally unimaginable, because the days would just be filled with depression, and maybe I will also be crushed with dilemma, blinded by my crush towards him. Some girls and guys have fallen out in their belief towards God because of relationships with people who don't have God in their hearts, and I didn't want anything which have the chance of disrupting my relationship with Him in the future. That is one of the reasons of why God doesn't want us to be equally yoked with a person who isn't a Christian.
I am posting about this because I am a sentimental person, lol. The reason of why I have a Livejournal and would love to keep it updated is so that I will have my memories inside it, so that when I grow older each day, I can look back and think, "Haah, that actually happened to me? Hahahaha. Hmm, maybe I remember something like that..." and all those nice or bad nostalgic feelings would come to me. I like that. ^_^. I've been less sentimental nowadays though, actually. And so, the reason of why I am posting this is so that my mind would be refreshed again of what happened in this chapter of my life of where I experienced a lot of different things for the first time.
Goodbye Baka, thank you for all the memories you gave, be it good or bad, you were the guy whom I have so far fell into the deepest crush with. ^_^
The posts which were related to him:
[ before he confessed]
[ about to remind him again]
[ he 'led' me to prayer meet]
[ mentioned as Kei]
[ in the process of getting over #1]
[ mentioned above the dashes]
[ mentioned as the last update]
I thank all those who have listened to me about all those fun, angry and sad times of me and him. I thank all those who have supported and encouraged me in the right way. I thank you, asou, Jo and Keke for listening to me blabber. XD. I thank you three, very, very much. ^_^