This weekend was the first time I introduced myself as Vice in a very long time. I had started to introduce myself as that out west but found it hard to maintain the name when I moved back. Now that I'm going westward again, I figured I might as well get used to it before I head out there. I don't want to be Sammy. I would much rather be someone ( Read more... )

How dare you text me and bitch about your depression and how no one wants you or wants to help you and you're worthless. What the fuck does that make me? The one who wasn't even good enough for someone who's "worthless." I already fucking know that I'm not good enough for anyone. I didn't need you to just rub it in my face with your incessant ( Read more... )

About 3-4 days ago, Chris decided to let me know he wants to stay at the canyon and that he wants us to break up ( Read more... )

Yesterday was like the most perfect day ever. I woke up and got to chat with Joe for the first time in forever. We joked around about how the Joe and Chris balance has been thrown off sync. Way to much Chris, not enough Joe. I feel bad because when Chris and I first started hanging out I told Joe I would be sure to make sure that didn't happen. A ( Read more... )

I found out he's alive. I tricked him into adding my xbl msn account. He didn't respond to anything I said and promptly blocked me. But my god, all this pain about him having suicided? I have so many mixed feelings about it ( Read more... )

FYI, I hate Jon's middle brother. He's messy. He's moody. He thinks he owns the place. He's wasteful. He's unhygenic. I could go on and on. Simply put, he's the main reason I -need- to get out of this damn house. Whhiiiich, hopefully now can happen if Jon keeps this 10USD/hour job. Just in time too ( Read more... )

So I think I'm going to dye my hair today. At least get the bleach in. I just have to find the damn motivation for it ( Read more... )

I am so absolutely confused about how I feel about life. On one part, I'm happy. Things are good. On the other hand, my imagined fear of abandonment is keeping me from enjoying things like I should.

I like to play TF2 on Steam nowadays. it keeps me content. Plus I'M FUCKING HUNGRY BRB 30 MIN I NEED TO GET SOME FUCKING FOOD IN ME AFTER ALL THAT ( Read more... )

I will become a better person for you.
I will become perfect for you.

No matter what lengths I have to go through.

You are my one and only.

So, my last few journals have been mopey and woe is me ( Read more... )