Basketcase on Aisle 3
So, this morning was my annual visit to Dermatology Associates here in Tallahassee.
Yes, annual. My PCP first sent me about three years ago for a growth on my thumb that he thought was a bad planter's wart which turned out to be a callous. At that time, the doc who would become my usual dermatologist did a full skin-check and declared everything fine and good, but that due to my fair skin he wanted to schedule me for another appointment the next year and establish me as a patient. Which I really should have done sooner because, hey, Irish-Germanic descent and fair-ass skin.
2008 and 2009 were the normal check-ups: go in, get looked over, clean bill of health granted, make appointment for the following year. Today was a little different.
Last month sometime, whilst we were lying out and attempting to get tanned (as usual, the main success I had was that I didn't wind up burnt), apollymi noticed that one of the moles on my shoulder looked a bit reddish to her. It's in a spot where I have to crane my neck to look at it, so I couldn't really tell if anything about it had changed or no; either way, I made a mental-and-verbal note to have Dr. Low take a look at it.
Fast-forward to today, 8:40 AM. I got to the office a bit early - 8:30 - so I could get paperwork out of the way then was taken back pretty fast. By 8:42 Dr. Low was in the room and I had him check that mole we were somewhat iffy about. He looked at it, then said that since it was only a month's span of time there was no visual way of tracking major changes that there were two ways we could go with it:
So he tells me that the biopsy will be sent to the lab and in a week I'll either get a letter in the mail confirming that it's a normal benign mole or a phone call asking me to come back in, at which time they will scoop out the area to get to the root of the growth. He seemed pretty confident that this is benign, and sent me to schedule my appointment for next year.
I get to work, get on IM with Li, tell her how the appointment went (although not with time stamps and the like), and plug in my iPod so I have tunes at work. This is about 9:30-ish.
One hour later, it hits me: the biopsy could prove that nothing's wrong, but there's still the possibility that yes it could and I would have to have minor surgery.
Understandably, I am now in mini-panic mode.
I'm trying to hold it together, as I'm at the office and will be until about 4:30 or so, but I don't know if I'll flip my shit completely after that or not. I'm trying to be calm, but... fuck fuck fuck.
So, there's that. After work Li and I may go to the Verizon store to get her phone updated then roll home. I may wind up playing a ton of Wii Tennis or Wii Bowling to try and keep from dwelling on this. That or I'll shut myself in my room and cry a fucking river over the possible outcomes of my biopsy. For now, back to listening to my iTunes and trying to be a Big Girl at work.
Yes, annual. My PCP first sent me about three years ago for a growth on my thumb that he thought was a bad planter's wart which turned out to be a callous. At that time, the doc who would become my usual dermatologist did a full skin-check and declared everything fine and good, but that due to my fair skin he wanted to schedule me for another appointment the next year and establish me as a patient. Which I really should have done sooner because, hey, Irish-Germanic descent and fair-ass skin.
2008 and 2009 were the normal check-ups: go in, get looked over, clean bill of health granted, make appointment for the following year. Today was a little different.
Last month sometime, whilst we were lying out and attempting to get tanned (as usual, the main success I had was that I didn't wind up burnt), apollymi noticed that one of the moles on my shoulder looked a bit reddish to her. It's in a spot where I have to crane my neck to look at it, so I couldn't really tell if anything about it had changed or no; either way, I made a mental-and-verbal note to have Dr. Low take a look at it.
Fast-forward to today, 8:40 AM. I got to the office a bit early - 8:30 - so I could get paperwork out of the way then was taken back pretty fast. By 8:42 Dr. Low was in the room and I had him check that mole we were somewhat iffy about. He looked at it, then said that since it was only a month's span of time there was no visual way of tracking major changes that there were two ways we could go with it:
- Not do anything and just have me keep an eye on it for any changes over the next several months.
- Biopsy it and send it to the lab.
So he tells me that the biopsy will be sent to the lab and in a week I'll either get a letter in the mail confirming that it's a normal benign mole or a phone call asking me to come back in, at which time they will scoop out the area to get to the root of the growth. He seemed pretty confident that this is benign, and sent me to schedule my appointment for next year.
I get to work, get on IM with Li, tell her how the appointment went (although not with time stamps and the like), and plug in my iPod so I have tunes at work. This is about 9:30-ish.
One hour later, it hits me: the biopsy could prove that nothing's wrong, but there's still the possibility that yes it could and I would have to have minor surgery.
Understandably, I am now in mini-panic mode.
I'm trying to hold it together, as I'm at the office and will be until about 4:30 or so, but I don't know if I'll flip my shit completely after that or not. I'm trying to be calm, but... fuck fuck fuck.
So, there's that. After work Li and I may go to the Verizon store to get her phone updated then roll home. I may wind up playing a ton of Wii Tennis or Wii Bowling to try and keep from dwelling on this. That or I'll shut myself in my room and cry a fucking river over the possible outcomes of my biopsy. For now, back to listening to my iTunes and trying to be a Big Girl at work.