My first therapy session in a month was today. I didn't really feel like leaving the house but it was sooooo good. I had a lot to talk about and got some really good feedback, and after crying through some drama, I'm feeling empowered and validated and capable. I hope it lasts ( Read more... )

I've been processing some of the Really Bad Shit that happened in my marriage lately. Something triggered a memory of one of the most awful things that McKenzie ever did to me, and I've been having a hugely emotional reaction for the last couple of days. I think the main issue is that when I learned about it first two years ago, we were just ( Read more... )

Two different people canceled plans on me for back to back days -- tonight and tomorrow -- and I couldn't be more relieved. I slept until 3pm today (after a 2-hour foray into the real world at 8am to take Toby to work and then go to a clinic appointment for my drug trial). I did go to the gym tonight, and while I was there, my Wednesday lunch date ( Read more... )

Maybe I've written this before, or thought it before, but it feels like something I need to write down now as I process it ( Read more... )

I had a meeting with a personal injury attorney this morning about my car accident case. I'd met with another lawyer previously, but he had to refer me because he didn't have the bandwidth to take my case, though he had been very optimistic about it. The lawyer I met with today was much less so, and now I'm left wondering how to move forward with ( Read more... )

Last night I had a dream that I was cuddling with Nicolas Batum, the French small forward who starts for the Trailblazers. And Batum kept referring to our cuddling as "lovemaking." That was weird. I'm a big fan, but I've never been particularly attracted to him. Guess I was just really hot for cuddles last night. (I may have gone to bed under the ( Read more... )

Youguysyouguysyouguys! I finished my real estate coursework! I still have a few steps before I'm licensed -- there are end-of-course exams I have to pass, and I should study a bit before I try to take those, because some of that reading is not very fresh in my mind, but I did take one of them today and passed it (for the most recent subject ( Read more... )

McKenzie got home yesterday evening and we had a session with our counselor. The last few weeks have been brutally hard and I've been having a difficult time thinking about the future. I have so many potential plans that I just haven't been able to commit to because I don't know if I'll be married or divorcing, financially okay or broke, etc. Am I ( Read more... )

Things today got worse before they got better. Shit, you guys, it's been rough. People have been there for me, though. I appreciate that. I appreciate that people are understanding about the shit I'm going through, and sometimes I will be crying at my desk, and my coworkers no longer make a big deal of this. They understand, they are there for me, ( Read more... )

I painted my fingernails bright red and bright yellow yesterday. Every time I look at my hands, I think of fire trucks ( Read more... )