Every single Christmas thing we own has been pulled down from the attic. Decades-old cardboard boxes inherited from parents and the dead, way too many snowmen, and giant baubles that need batteries. The tree and the accompanying ornaments are still somewhere in the guest room- at least everything is now in the livable areas of the house. We'll ( Read more... )

We adopted a new cat! I started a new job ( Read more... )

Our house looks like a Christmas bomb went off, cardboard boxes and storage totes still on the floor.  Fidget had just gone in the attic this past Sunday, dragging down stockings and reindeer and blow-up penguin mailboxes.  I did decorate the office space behind me for a Zoom office party whatever, but that holiday energy never got to come ( Read more... )

Whew, what a time to be alive, amirite? I had started a post after the last one, then got distracted, and then PANDEMIC, so it's been a bit touch and go over here. Maybe highlights?

( Monthly highlights... )

What a sucky way to end the day. I sit here in my darkened living room, somewhat illuminated by the strings of globes and chili lights, the Christmas tree in the corner. This time of year makes me wonder, "are we better?" I'm trying to be thankful of the holiday this year, a long day that started with group and peaked with a dinner of steak ( Read more... )

Grief is such a strange thing. I know this and studied this, and ironically, have become a quasi-expert in this and profess it as my "niche", but I continue to be fascinated by how I am responding to my own grief. It weaves and comes through me at the most unexpected times. We grieve forever, but the acute pain fades, then rears its head back up ( Read more... )

Last night, I came home feeling guilty for the state my house was in. Typically, it's because we're clutter bugs. I used to think it would be great if Fidget was just a tiny bit neater than I was, in order to promote overall tidiness. Instead, we both live like 12-year-old boys ( Read more... )

I've spent much of the past week in a satiated but busy blur. I decided that with my parents up here, I would host Thanksgiving. I've never done so. I've been a large part of Bluejay's gatherings over the years, but never in my own house. I've never cooked a turkey. My biggest responsibilities were to make deviled eggs and sweet potatoes. ( Read more... )

Within a week, I became engaged, my mother flew North, I drove a pickup truck like a boss, and I caught another flight to retrieve my father. It's our last night in Florida, the house a skeleton of the sixteen years we've lived in it. My father sits alone in a recliner, walls outlined in nicotine of memories from years past.

My room has the bed I ( Read more... )

I've been sitting on this couch, off and on, for hours, first trying to do budgets then finishing reading library books. I've been sick since Tuesday, still went to Bad Decisions for his journal article on Wednesday, then held out since Thursday. I did some cleaning when I wasn't hacking with every ounce of my being. I woke this morning, worried ( Read more... )