So today me and kristin went and saw star wars. ok yeah, i'm a fuckin nerd and i dragged her along, but when i thought about the movie, i could apply it to myself. Without the aliens and lasers and all. First off i am darth vader, just not quite as bad ass. I'm deeply in love with a woman i would change the galaxy for. In the movie he turns himself ( Read more... )

I'm sorry, especially to kristin, the previous journal was not written because my grandfather died, but becuase i finally got the words into my head to express the grief that is in me now in the song that I hope to perform at his funeral.

Poppop you're gone ( Read more... )

wow, its 1030, easter sucks already. goddamit

Ok, so I write my manager a not saying i cannot work easter, and guess what, they have me working tomorrow. I told her I cannot come in. I also gave her a note saying that I could not work april 1st. The easter note she says she didn't get, but I know that she got the april 1st note because she gave me off for one of the days I requested, and it ( Read more... )

Another night, another opportunity to fuck up, and thats what I did, cause thats what I seem to do best. I've fucked up this whole week, and I've fucked up the last month. Nothing has gone right since christmas, NOTHING. I fucking hate working, I fucking hate doing anything. I wanna be able to sit back and fucking enjoy life, instead I find myself ( Read more... )

What I have done. I have caused the only person in this world who truly loves me to doubt me. I have made my parents upset with me, I have let down my grandparents, I have gotten a job that is moving me backwards, I have made less time for people and I have made myself miserable ( Read more... )

God damnit. Its wednesday that means I have to work till midnight, and work I did, I worked my fucking ass off. So then this stupid woman comes in and buys 4 tangerines, and I put em in her bag and she goes on her merry way, then she comes back about a half hour later and starts yelling at me "where are my tangerines" and shes gettin all screamin ( Read more... )

I hate today
I wish it was yesterday
and I could fix everything
that I broke

I am not happy with myself today
I hurt the one I love and there is no excuse for that
There is no excuse for me or anything I have done

Ok, so two things that have pissed me off in the last day or so. The first being this dumb old woman who came into the A&P last night. She's buying bagels at 2 for 1. Ok, i type in the code for six bagels twice and it doesn't come off, so I call the manager over, he goes, oh, thats the wrong code, you have to enter it for one bagel and press ( Read more... )