WART #64: Birthday Radio, with Remus and Sirius

[toujours_sirius]

((Backdated to after Sirius’s birthday party))Sadly, the WART studio had gone unused for some time, the broadcasting equipment gathering dust as the students were too busy socializing, smexing, and, on occasion, studying, to play DJ

Comments

::Floos in::

[lilypotter60]

*is laughing too hard to speak for a moment, is carrying rather a large pot of coffee*

My hygiene is just fine, Remus. Black is a vicious liar. Also, his song dedications made no sense. I'm afraid no one is too sexy for me. *pause, more laughter* You're both rather pissed, did you know?

[toujours_sirius]

Li-li-li-li-lily! It's absolutely magnificent that you are here. And...I am well aware that I...am pissed out of my mind. Which is as it should be, since it's my birthday.

So...Lilicious. What can I do for you? Would you like to hear another song? Would you like some alcohol?

[lilypotter60]

*manages to talk through giggles* Er, no, no alcohol. I think you and Remus have drunk enough for all of us. I did bring you blokes coffee. Just so you can walk back to your rooms without falling down a staircase.

*pause* Well, Siri-pet. *smirk* If you think you could pick me out a song that made sense, go for it.

[toujours_sirius]

There's always room for more alcohol. Especially after some of it has come back up. Here, give me that coffee. I've got some Firewhisky that it would taste fantastic in. Because I have to maintain the buzz! It's a birthday buzz, Lily, love!

Oh, and I think I have the perfect song for you. Homsar introduced me to it, and now that I'm drunk, I think I'm finally beginning to understand it. I think it's about...bollocks. Here it is, Lily, my dear: Daler Mehndi's Tunak Tunak Tun!

[lilypotter60]

Trust me, Black. You're far beyond a buzz. *hands over coffee* But, so long as you're passing it out, I might as well have a nip of Firewhisky, yeah? *grins* Got to celebrate with the birthday boy, after all!

*blinks* Er...well, besides the fact you think everything is about bollocks, I'm afraid I really don't see it. But cheers, love.

[toujours_sirius]

*fills two glasses with Firewhisky and adds a couple of shots of coffee to them* Here. It's more than a nip, but you know what they say about nips.

*dead silence*

*starts cracking up* Yeah, I don't really know what they say about nips either. But it seemed like a good idea at the time.

So happy birthday to me and my bollocks. Because we're all the same age, y'know. *takes a massive swig from the glass*

[lilypotter60]

*laughs as she takes the mug* Two nips are better than one, perhaps? Or maybe something regarding a mouthful? You must be shite-faced, dear, if you're unable to make some innuendo out of that. For shame.

*raises glass* To you and your bollocks. And, er, yes, you are the same age. You go hand in hand together, eh? *grins*

[toujours_sirius]

*stares for a moment* Now that's just ridiculous. It's two nipples are better than one. Unless you've just got one breast. In which case...I'm so glad I'm not you! *starts laughing crazily again, only to stop suddenly*

I think we should sing a song together. *bangs hand on the broadcasting board thingy, causing a certain sound effect to be played by accident*

*laughs like a madman again*

[lilypotter60]

*rolls eyes* Yes, love. I am just ridiculous.

*laughs at him laughing* Oh, no, Black. Not enough alcohol in the world to get me to sing a duet with you. However, if you'd like to serenade me... *sits down, crosses legs, and leans forward expectantly* I am all ears.

[toujours_sirius]

I am a manly man! And therefore, I am not afraid of a pansy little serenade! See, you thought I wouldn't do it, but you, m'lady, are W-R-O-N-G wrong.

Let me just play a little track here. Ah, yes, here it is. *puts on an instrumental track of a certain little ditty*

Moony and Lilicious, this one's for you, because...I love you! I love you, man!

*starts to sing*

It must have been cold there in my shaaaaaaaaadow
To never have...something on your face
You were *indistinct mangling of words* me fiiiiiiiine...FUCK!...that's your way
You always were behind me...FUCK again!

So I was the one with all the goooooooooory - I mean glory!
While you were the one with all the streeeeeeength
A beautiful face without a name, for so loooooooooong
A beautiful smile to hide the paaaaaaaaaaaaaain - Evans, you have a beautiful smile!

Did you ever know that you're my heeeeeeeeeeeeero - yes, you are!
You're everything I would like to beeeeeee - except that you're a girl, and while that's fun on a temporary basis, I really like my bollocks

[lilypotter60]

*started cracking up at about the second line and is now laughing so hard she is crying* *applauds loudly* Cheers, Black! That was just lovely. Never has a song been mangled so thoroughly and in such a manly fashion.

And if you had wings, Black, I would gladly be the wind beneath them. But you are simply pissed, so I'll just be the bird who passes you more alcohol. *gives him his mug* The enabling wind beneath your drunken wings. *takes a drink of her own, still laughing*

[toujours_sirius]

That's okay by me, too, y'know.

*takes the mug, spilling half its contents on himself before managing to sit up and roughly take a huge swallow, the liquid dribbling onto his face*

*looks into the mug and frowns*

Where has all the coffeewhisky gone?

[lilypotter60]

I'm glad you're so obliging.

*shouldn't laugh at his inebriated attempts to drink, but can't help herself*

Er, right. I think you're all done with the coffeewhisky now, love. You can have regular coffee for a bit, until you've sobered up enough to drink without spilling. *attempts a Scourgify to help clean off his shirt*

Re: ::Floos in::

[profmoony]

Lily! Thank Merlin you're here. Now, please tell us - what kind of soap do you use and what kind of toothpaste? This is very, very important. I think it might have something to do with fermented mares. Or evil clowns. Or something.

Re: ::Floos in::

[lilypotter60]

*tries very hard to remain serious, even though she really wants to laugh* Well, anything for the fight against evil clowns. Or fermented mares.

I use Euthymol toothpaste and Kew Gardens Lavender & Moroccan Olive soap.

*grins* Does that help? Merlin knows we must all band together against the evil clowns...or something.

Re: ::Floos in::

[toujours_sirius]

*very slurred* Evans is winning the fight against bad hygiene! She always smells good, and that's what keeps the clowns away. They prefer the scent of peanuts and elephant dung.