Hanamuke (2/?)
Title: Hanamuke
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Baekyeol
Disclaimer: i don't own them. i wish i did.
Notes: beta-ed by lovely hotarumyst.
Summary: “I want this Baek. I want to know how good it feels like for Jongin and Kyungsoo having sex. I want to know if it’s as good as they let it out to be. I want this. I want you. Do this with me.”
Chapter 1
Baekhyun wakes up to a mind-splitting hangover and the feeling of tender muscles all over. It’s way too bright as he squints to check the time, and he feels like puking from the way the room seems to be spinning endlessly. It’s 9 in the morning, not too early for most people but certainly too early for someone accustomed to waking up at noon. The sore muscles feel like dead weight as he struggles to roll on the bed to bury his head underneath the pillows. The excessive sunshine blinds him like a bat, but stops rolling around when he feels an arm wrap around his waist. He dares to open an eye slightly against his better judgment and yelps. There’s a fucking naked Park Chanyeol beside him.
“Oh, shit!” he curses as memories of what happened the night before comes crashing down on him. “Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!” He swears as breathing become an arduous task and tries to remember how to make his lungs function, the pillow smooshed against his face, making the task harder. He glances at the body next to him again, as if the second time will make the reality seem like a dream and go away. It doesn’t.
Lack of alcohol tolerance is a feature he always had when he discovered the liquor years ago, but the stupidity and inability to make a good judgment isn’t. He’s always been careful not too drink too much, witnessing the numerous shows of too drunk friends making fools out of themselves. He had vowed to never look like them. Taking big deep calming breaths, he tries to stealthily push away Chanyeol’s gangly arm. The younger man sleeps like a log and no amount of earthquakes can stir him. But at this moment, he can’t risk waking him up in this very awkward situation. He’ll probably go all out Hulk when he discovers them like this.
Baekhyun manages to pry the arm away and scans the room for his clothes as the need to escape fast takes over his senses. He finds them strewn on the floor near the door and gently gets off the bed, the thing cooperating by not creaking against his weight. A blush creeps on his face as he realizes that he’s still stark naked when the blankets slide off him, hickeys adorning his body in inappropriate places like some tattoo.
Tiptoeing across the floor, he grabs his jeans and shirt and scans for his underwear when he finds it missing from the clump. He sees it near the foot of the bed and lets out a frustrated sigh. Now he has to go back there again just when he’s so near to his escape door.
He already has his right leg in through his boxers when the rustling of sheets accompanying Chanyeol’s shifting on the bed distracts him. Baekhyun’s heart almost drops at that moment (unecessary), ('and he') holds his breath and stills his actions, afraid the slightest of movements might wake the sleeping Totoro. A sigh of relief escapes him as he hears soft snores fill in the room again. He manages to slip on his underwear without anymore trouble and is about to leave when he hears his name being called out this time.
“Baekhyun-ah,” Chanyeol murmurs in his sleep.
Baekhyun tears up; heart flying out towards the younger man immediately. He approaches the bed carefully and stops in front of Chanyeol’s sleeping face. He brushes the soft locks away from his face and bends down on his knees. It hurts him to leave like this. It hurts him to pretend that this never really happened if ever Chanyeol asks in the future. Hurts him to think that this memory will be swiped clean away just like the other times his friend got extremely drunk and did stupid things. Hurts him to think that what happened will be categorized as just one of those stupid things that happened and not something more. A tear drops and he angrily swipes it away. No, he will not cry, this is his fault too for being careless and letting his emotions take over. He knew there would be consequences for) his actions, and he'd have to man up and take it all in. A single night, and that’s all he needs to get Chanyeol out of his system. It will be enough.
And he leaves with the softest of kisses on Chanyeol’s forehead in his own way of saying goodbye.
“You what?!” Kyungsoo asks loudly, catching other patrons’ attentions. It’s early in the afternoon three days after Baekhyun’s disappearing act in Macau. No note, no phone calls; they searched high and low around the hotel and areas they were at the night before. They finally figured out his whereabouts when Suho used his connections and contacts the Korean Airlines, asking if Baekhyun had taken a flight back home. He did. They ended up going home a day early than their intended flight home.
The younger man manages to catch his hyung in the middle of his grocery shopping after numerous unanswered calls. Kyungsoo had to drag him all the way down to the nearest coffee shop for some answers.
“You slept with Chanyeol?” Kyungsoo repeats loudly again, this time earning disapproving looks from disturbed customers, either from being too loud or from the remark of him sleeping with another man.
“Yes Kyungsoo, I’m sorry, would you mind repeat that again? I guess Timbuktu didn’t hear you,” Baekhyun grits against his teeth.
“Sorry,” Kyungsoo says, tone more coffee shop friendly. “But seriously? You left because of that?” he asks with an unimpressed tone, round eyes judging.
Baekhyun’s jaws slack in disbelief. Isn’t his reason enough to make anyone run away from that kind of situation? “Excuse me? I think I didn’t hear you well. Are you implying that what I did isn’t justifiable?”
Kyungsoo rolls his eyes as he stirs his iced coffee with his green straw. “Yes I am,” he answers after he sips a good amount of his drink. “I mean, come on. You’ve been waiting all your life for an opportunity to tell Chanyeol how much you love his oh-so-unruly-but-cute hair and his crazy eye twitches. Ouch!” Kyungsoo cries out as he receives a strong punch on his shoulder. “So abusive,” he mutters as he glares at his friend and rubs at the sore spot.
“I don’t sound like that. I don’t even spazz about his crazy hair and eye twitches,” Baekhyun grumbles as he folds his arms in front of his chest in offense.
Kyungsoo gives him a pointed look. “You don’t. Anymore. You used to before, back when we were still in high school remember?” Kyungsoo reminds him, smirking at the affronted look on his friend’s face, mouth gaping in an attempt to comeback with a witty response but failing miserably. “You used to harass me with all things Chanyeol related when your little heart couldn't contain all your feels anymore,” he adds in as he stares curiously at his drink and all the water dripping from the bottom. “But we grew up and you got hold of your hormones and your raging feels. Then you stopped spazzing all of a sudden. I thought you got over your crush on him. Well, until he declared he’s in love with-“
“Stop.” Baekhyun interrupts, strong and firm.
Kyungsoo looks up and sees the tense jaw of his friend. He sighs before continuing, placing his drink back on the table. “All I’m saying is that what happened was your chance. You blew it by running away instead of facing him head on.”
“I’m sorry if not everyone’s as courageous as you , Do Kyungsoo,” Baekhyun says in malevolence , and he focuses his attention to the passersby outside.
“Bullshit,” Kyungsoo curses.
Baekhyun eyes him warily, never having heard the other curse before. The effect of being in a relationship with Jongin for too long, maybe?
“Don’t turn this back on me, Baekhyun. You know I only followed your advice in order to tell Jongin how I feel. I just don’t get it why you can’t follow your own advice as well.”
“I can’t. You know that.”
“Why? Just because she’s-“
“Shit!” Baekhyun curses as he ducks underneath the small table.
The sudden outburst catches Kyungsoo off guard, and he searches the room for the source of his friend’s unease. He then sees a visibly distraught Chanyeol entering the shop. Perfect , he thinks , as he waves his arm in an effort to catch the other’s attention. “Chanyeol-ah,” he shouts when his efforts go unnoticed. Chanyeol notices him then.
“Ah, Kyungsoo-ah, what are you doing here?” Chanyeol asks as he heads towards his friend.
“Nothing, I was just talking to,” Kyungsoo answers as he turns his attention back to Baekhyun. Who is nowhere to be found. Kyungsoo looks underneath the table and mutters in disbelief at the disappearing skills his friend is rapidly developing.
“Uhm, you okay , Soo?” Chanyeol interrupts the mini search being conducted by his friend.
“Wha? What? Yeah,” Kyungsoo says, flustered, as he tries to regain his composure.
“Who were you talking to?” Chanyeol asks in intrigue and gestures at the left beverage on the table.
“Uhm..Jongin?” Kyungsoo lies.
Chanyeol cocks an eyebrow. “Isn’t Jongin still in the university for his dance practice?”
“Oh. I meant Jongin’s friend! Who’s also my friend,” Kyungsoo says. “But he isn’t your friend!” he adds when he thinks his description fits Baekhyun too much. “You don’t even know him!” he says desperately.
“O-kay,” Chanyeol replies, a bit weirded out by his friend’s suspicious actions.
“Uhm, what are you doing here?” Kyungsoo asks, voice squeaking a little bit , and he wants to kick himself in the shin.
“I’m looking for Baekhyun. I’ve been calling him and it’s always unanswered or out of coverage area. I’m worried so I went by his apartment , but I guess he’s not there either,” Chanyeol answers as he slips into the seat that baekhyun sat in seconds ago. “You? This is pretty far away from your usual spot with Jongin.”
“Grocery shopping? I heard that they always have the best deals around here,” Kyungsoo answers after sipping his drink nervously to the very last drop until a loud sucking noise against the leftover ice resonates around the room. He smiles shyly at his lame attempt of a lie and thanks the heavens for the innocence of his friend , who wouldn’t see through his sorry excuse.
“Where are your groceries, then?”
The heavens might not be on his side today. Kyungsoo’s not even sure why he’s lying to Chanyeol in the first place; he’s not the best liar in their group. But he figures it really isn’t his place to fix this up. It’s really all up to Baekhyun to tell Chanyeol exactly what he feels; Kyungsoo just hopes he does that before their friend gets married.
“I saw my friend before I even arrived at the grocery store. I got whisked away here before I knew it. He just left too, too bad you didn’t get to meet him,” Kyungsoo continues to lie.
“Yeah, too bad,” Chanyeol agrees. “Do you think that washroom’s occupied? I kind of need to pee,” he asks as he moves towards the restroom.
“I don’t think so?” Kyungsoo answers as he eyes the bathroom nearby their table.
Chanyeol stops in front of the door and knocks tentatively. The drive to Baekhyun’s house is quite long and it’s been a while since he felt the need to pee. “Excuse me? Is anybody there?” he asks as he tries opening the door but finds it locked.
“Just a moment!” a high pitched voice answers through the door.
“Oh, okay!” Chanyeol answers back as he walks back to his shared table with Kyungsoo.
“Occupied?”
“Yeah,” Chanyeol answers as he slumps back into his chair.
Kyungsoo’s phone suddenly belts out My Humps , earning him snickers from his tall friend. Damn Jongin for insisting on the stupid ringtone. He embarrassedly fishes it out of his pockets to answer the call.
“Yeobosaeyo?”
“Fuck Kyungsoo! Get him out of there!”
Kyungsoo pulls back his phone and stares at the screen in disbelief. He laughs nervously at Chanyeol before pressing the device against his ears once more.
“Where are you?” Kyungsoo tries to ask nonchalantly when , inside, all he wants to do is throw Baekhyun out of the nearest skyscraper to his certain death.
“I’m in the fucking bathroom , idiot! Where else could I be? It’s the nearest hiding place!”
Kyungsoo smiles despite a vein in his temple coming close to exploding. “Why did you go there in the first place?” he asks sweetly. He checks back on Chanyeol who is looking busy, fiddling with his phone.
“You know exactly why! Just get him out of there! Or distract him enough until I can leave this place!”
“How do you propose we do that then?” Kyungsoo asks, his right hand massaging his temples, his irritation starting to show through his façade.
“I don’t know! Just please, Kyungsoo! I don’t want to see him right now! I’m not yet ready!”
Kyungsoo sighs as he hears desperation seep out of every word Baekhyun says. “Fine, you owe me big time,” he says and hangs up.
“So , Channie!” he says a little too brightly while clapping his hands in feigned excitement.
“I’m sorry Soo. I have to go. Dress fitting or something,” Chanyeol says as he stands up from his seat. “Tell me if you see Baek anywhere , okay? Tell him we need to talk!” and he disappears through the door leaving a dumbfounded Kyungsoo behind.
“He’s gone,” Kyungsoo deadpans as he knocks at the restroom door. A small head peeks through the small crack and checks left and right for any sign of a human Totoro. Satisfied, Baekhyun finally steps out of the restroom, smelling too much like the aroma therapy oil wafting inside.
“You’re a miracle worker , you know that?” Baekhyun says a little later as he settles back into his seat. “What did you tell him to make him leave?”
“He left himself, said something about dress fitting,” Kyungsoo answers as he contemplates whether to order another iced coffee or not.
“Oh,” Baekhyun only mutters in response, eyes downcast before settling on the view outside, chin nestled on his hand propped on top of the table.
“He told me he came here after he went to look for you at your apartment. He’s worried , Baekhyun. He told me to tell you that he wants to talk to you when I see you around,” Kyungsoo opens up the topic cautiously.
Baekhyun laughs at the thought that Chanyeol wants to talk to him. “To tell me what? I’m some kind of piece of shit and doesn’t want to see me again? That I don’t need to bother coming to his wedding?” he spats.
“You know very well that Chanyeol isn’t like that. He cares for you just as much as you care for him. You’re practically his family,” Kyungsoo argues , to which Baekhyun answers with a loud scoff and a roll of his eyes. “You know what I meant , and don’t say that you don’t. He needs to know everything. He needs to know before he settles down and before everything’s too late.”
“There’s nothing for him to know, nothing worth much of his time and ruining a perfectly pretty wedding.” Baekhyun continues to argue, righteousness starting to win over the battle against his wants.
Kyungsoo reaches out to one of Baekhyun’s hands and squeezes it lightly in an attempt to get his friend’s attention back. “You can’t decide that for yourself,” he says as he gently turns Baekhyun’s face towards him. “He needs to know what you feel so that he can decide on this for himself, to decide on what will be the best for the both of you. You haven’t even been rejected yet and you pull away without taking the risk. What if he loves you back too?”
“He doesn’t.” Baekhyun sighs, tears brimming.
“Why would he make love to you then?”
“It’s not love , Soo. It’s sex. Plain , no feelings attached sex.” Baekhyun swipes the tear threatening to fall. “He just wanted to know if it feels just as great as Jongin claims it to be. Nothing more. I’m just the stupid and willing participant in one of his experiments.”
Kyungsoo sighs as he stares at his friend. “No guy would fuck another man just for that reason alone. And I love my boyfriend to death, but we all know that whatever comes out of his mouth is trash and complete idiocy. Chanyeol would know better than to trust Jongin’s opinions.”
“So are you saying the sex isn’t nice?” Baekhyun challenges, trying to veer to another topic.
“It is, but that’s not the point here , is it?” Kyungsoo pans , as he tries to read all the emotions flying all at once in his friend’s eyes. People tease him often about his large round eyes, but he has never seen another pair of eyes more expressive than Baekhyun’s. All his emotions are in there , ready to be read if one just takes the time to appreciate them. That’s why he’s been wondering what kind of logic Chanyeol has to not be able to interpret just how much longing is in Baekhyun’s eyes every time they look at each other.
Baekhyun breaks off the eye contact and moves to continue to stare outside. It’s starting to rain , and people are clamoring to get in the small café shop.
“What exactly do you feel Baekhyun?” Kyungsoo asks later as the murmur of the shop turns slightly louder. The roll call of name by the baristas gets more frequent.
“I’m not even so sure anymore,” Baekhyun answers as he fiddles with his necklace.
Kyungsoo recognizes the necklace as a gift from Baekhyun’s stepsister, a Taurus pendant on a leather string. “Are you fine with watching him get married?”
“I am! I’m his best man right? I wouldn’t have agreed to do it if I wasn’t okay with it. It’s just that this happened! Messing everything up. All my feelings and shit.,” Baekhyun explodes, hands gripping on the pendant tightly, and he eyes his friend as if he asked the most ridiculous thing in the world.
Kyungsoo squeezes his hand apologetically, not expecting the sudden outburst. “Well, if it’s any consolation, I’m a Baekyeol shipper until the end,” he says, trying to alleviate the mood.
“Obviously, there are no ships sailing here , Kyungsoo.” Baekhyun says dejectedly.
Kyungsoo’s phone rings again , and this time he checks the caller I.D.before picking it up. “That’s Jongin calling. I better get going.”
“I’ll drive you. I need to get something , anyways.” Baekhyun offers as he stands up from his seat and walks towards the exit.
“Thanks,” Kyungsoo mutters before answering his boyfriend’s call.
part ii
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Baekyeol
Disclaimer: i don't own them. i wish i did.
Notes: beta-ed by lovely hotarumyst.
Summary: “I want this Baek. I want to know how good it feels like for Jongin and Kyungsoo having sex. I want to know if it’s as good as they let it out to be. I want this. I want you. Do this with me.”
Chapter 1
Baekhyun wakes up to a mind-splitting hangover and the feeling of tender muscles all over. It’s way too bright as he squints to check the time, and he feels like puking from the way the room seems to be spinning endlessly. It’s 9 in the morning, not too early for most people but certainly too early for someone accustomed to waking up at noon. The sore muscles feel like dead weight as he struggles to roll on the bed to bury his head underneath the pillows. The excessive sunshine blinds him like a bat, but stops rolling around when he feels an arm wrap around his waist. He dares to open an eye slightly against his better judgment and yelps. There’s a fucking naked Park Chanyeol beside him.
“Oh, shit!” he curses as memories of what happened the night before comes crashing down on him. “Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!” He swears as breathing become an arduous task and tries to remember how to make his lungs function, the pillow smooshed against his face, making the task harder. He glances at the body next to him again, as if the second time will make the reality seem like a dream and go away. It doesn’t.
Lack of alcohol tolerance is a feature he always had when he discovered the liquor years ago, but the stupidity and inability to make a good judgment isn’t. He’s always been careful not too drink too much, witnessing the numerous shows of too drunk friends making fools out of themselves. He had vowed to never look like them. Taking big deep calming breaths, he tries to stealthily push away Chanyeol’s gangly arm. The younger man sleeps like a log and no amount of earthquakes can stir him. But at this moment, he can’t risk waking him up in this very awkward situation. He’ll probably go all out Hulk when he discovers them like this.
Baekhyun manages to pry the arm away and scans the room for his clothes as the need to escape fast takes over his senses. He finds them strewn on the floor near the door and gently gets off the bed, the thing cooperating by not creaking against his weight. A blush creeps on his face as he realizes that he’s still stark naked when the blankets slide off him, hickeys adorning his body in inappropriate places like some tattoo.
Tiptoeing across the floor, he grabs his jeans and shirt and scans for his underwear when he finds it missing from the clump. He sees it near the foot of the bed and lets out a frustrated sigh. Now he has to go back there again just when he’s so near to his escape door.
He already has his right leg in through his boxers when the rustling of sheets accompanying Chanyeol’s shifting on the bed distracts him. Baekhyun’s heart almost drops at that moment (unecessary), ('and he') holds his breath and stills his actions, afraid the slightest of movements might wake the sleeping Totoro. A sigh of relief escapes him as he hears soft snores fill in the room again. He manages to slip on his underwear without anymore trouble and is about to leave when he hears his name being called out this time.
“Baekhyun-ah,” Chanyeol murmurs in his sleep.
Baekhyun tears up; heart flying out towards the younger man immediately. He approaches the bed carefully and stops in front of Chanyeol’s sleeping face. He brushes the soft locks away from his face and bends down on his knees. It hurts him to leave like this. It hurts him to pretend that this never really happened if ever Chanyeol asks in the future. Hurts him to think that this memory will be swiped clean away just like the other times his friend got extremely drunk and did stupid things. Hurts him to think that what happened will be categorized as just one of those stupid things that happened and not something more. A tear drops and he angrily swipes it away. No, he will not cry, this is his fault too for being careless and letting his emotions take over. He knew there would be consequences for) his actions, and he'd have to man up and take it all in. A single night, and that’s all he needs to get Chanyeol out of his system. It will be enough.
And he leaves with the softest of kisses on Chanyeol’s forehead in his own way of saying goodbye.
“You what?!” Kyungsoo asks loudly, catching other patrons’ attentions. It’s early in the afternoon three days after Baekhyun’s disappearing act in Macau. No note, no phone calls; they searched high and low around the hotel and areas they were at the night before. They finally figured out his whereabouts when Suho used his connections and contacts the Korean Airlines, asking if Baekhyun had taken a flight back home. He did. They ended up going home a day early than their intended flight home.
The younger man manages to catch his hyung in the middle of his grocery shopping after numerous unanswered calls. Kyungsoo had to drag him all the way down to the nearest coffee shop for some answers.
“You slept with Chanyeol?” Kyungsoo repeats loudly again, this time earning disapproving looks from disturbed customers, either from being too loud or from the remark of him sleeping with another man.
“Yes Kyungsoo, I’m sorry, would you mind repeat that again? I guess Timbuktu didn’t hear you,” Baekhyun grits against his teeth.
“Sorry,” Kyungsoo says, tone more coffee shop friendly. “But seriously? You left because of that?” he asks with an unimpressed tone, round eyes judging.
Baekhyun’s jaws slack in disbelief. Isn’t his reason enough to make anyone run away from that kind of situation? “Excuse me? I think I didn’t hear you well. Are you implying that what I did isn’t justifiable?”
Kyungsoo rolls his eyes as he stirs his iced coffee with his green straw. “Yes I am,” he answers after he sips a good amount of his drink. “I mean, come on. You’ve been waiting all your life for an opportunity to tell Chanyeol how much you love his oh-so-unruly-but-cute hair and his crazy eye twitches. Ouch!” Kyungsoo cries out as he receives a strong punch on his shoulder. “So abusive,” he mutters as he glares at his friend and rubs at the sore spot.
“I don’t sound like that. I don’t even spazz about his crazy hair and eye twitches,” Baekhyun grumbles as he folds his arms in front of his chest in offense.
Kyungsoo gives him a pointed look. “You don’t. Anymore. You used to before, back when we were still in high school remember?” Kyungsoo reminds him, smirking at the affronted look on his friend’s face, mouth gaping in an attempt to comeback with a witty response but failing miserably. “You used to harass me with all things Chanyeol related when your little heart couldn't contain all your feels anymore,” he adds in as he stares curiously at his drink and all the water dripping from the bottom. “But we grew up and you got hold of your hormones and your raging feels. Then you stopped spazzing all of a sudden. I thought you got over your crush on him. Well, until he declared he’s in love with-“
“Stop.” Baekhyun interrupts, strong and firm.
Kyungsoo looks up and sees the tense jaw of his friend. He sighs before continuing, placing his drink back on the table. “All I’m saying is that what happened was your chance. You blew it by running away instead of facing him head on.”
“I’m sorry if not everyone’s as courageous as you , Do Kyungsoo,” Baekhyun says in malevolence , and he focuses his attention to the passersby outside.
“Bullshit,” Kyungsoo curses.
Baekhyun eyes him warily, never having heard the other curse before. The effect of being in a relationship with Jongin for too long, maybe?
“Don’t turn this back on me, Baekhyun. You know I only followed your advice in order to tell Jongin how I feel. I just don’t get it why you can’t follow your own advice as well.”
“I can’t. You know that.”
“Why? Just because she’s-“
“Shit!” Baekhyun curses as he ducks underneath the small table.
The sudden outburst catches Kyungsoo off guard, and he searches the room for the source of his friend’s unease. He then sees a visibly distraught Chanyeol entering the shop. Perfect , he thinks , as he waves his arm in an effort to catch the other’s attention. “Chanyeol-ah,” he shouts when his efforts go unnoticed. Chanyeol notices him then.
“Ah, Kyungsoo-ah, what are you doing here?” Chanyeol asks as he heads towards his friend.
“Nothing, I was just talking to,” Kyungsoo answers as he turns his attention back to Baekhyun. Who is nowhere to be found. Kyungsoo looks underneath the table and mutters in disbelief at the disappearing skills his friend is rapidly developing.
“Uhm, you okay , Soo?” Chanyeol interrupts the mini search being conducted by his friend.
“Wha? What? Yeah,” Kyungsoo says, flustered, as he tries to regain his composure.
“Who were you talking to?” Chanyeol asks in intrigue and gestures at the left beverage on the table.
“Uhm..Jongin?” Kyungsoo lies.
Chanyeol cocks an eyebrow. “Isn’t Jongin still in the university for his dance practice?”
“Oh. I meant Jongin’s friend! Who’s also my friend,” Kyungsoo says. “But he isn’t your friend!” he adds when he thinks his description fits Baekhyun too much. “You don’t even know him!” he says desperately.
“O-kay,” Chanyeol replies, a bit weirded out by his friend’s suspicious actions.
“Uhm, what are you doing here?” Kyungsoo asks, voice squeaking a little bit , and he wants to kick himself in the shin.
“I’m looking for Baekhyun. I’ve been calling him and it’s always unanswered or out of coverage area. I’m worried so I went by his apartment , but I guess he’s not there either,” Chanyeol answers as he slips into the seat that baekhyun sat in seconds ago. “You? This is pretty far away from your usual spot with Jongin.”
“Grocery shopping? I heard that they always have the best deals around here,” Kyungsoo answers after sipping his drink nervously to the very last drop until a loud sucking noise against the leftover ice resonates around the room. He smiles shyly at his lame attempt of a lie and thanks the heavens for the innocence of his friend , who wouldn’t see through his sorry excuse.
“Where are your groceries, then?”
The heavens might not be on his side today. Kyungsoo’s not even sure why he’s lying to Chanyeol in the first place; he’s not the best liar in their group. But he figures it really isn’t his place to fix this up. It’s really all up to Baekhyun to tell Chanyeol exactly what he feels; Kyungsoo just hopes he does that before their friend gets married.
“I saw my friend before I even arrived at the grocery store. I got whisked away here before I knew it. He just left too, too bad you didn’t get to meet him,” Kyungsoo continues to lie.
“Yeah, too bad,” Chanyeol agrees. “Do you think that washroom’s occupied? I kind of need to pee,” he asks as he moves towards the restroom.
“I don’t think so?” Kyungsoo answers as he eyes the bathroom nearby their table.
Chanyeol stops in front of the door and knocks tentatively. The drive to Baekhyun’s house is quite long and it’s been a while since he felt the need to pee. “Excuse me? Is anybody there?” he asks as he tries opening the door but finds it locked.
“Just a moment!” a high pitched voice answers through the door.
“Oh, okay!” Chanyeol answers back as he walks back to his shared table with Kyungsoo.
“Occupied?”
“Yeah,” Chanyeol answers as he slumps back into his chair.
Kyungsoo’s phone suddenly belts out My Humps , earning him snickers from his tall friend. Damn Jongin for insisting on the stupid ringtone. He embarrassedly fishes it out of his pockets to answer the call.
“Yeobosaeyo?”
“Fuck Kyungsoo! Get him out of there!”
Kyungsoo pulls back his phone and stares at the screen in disbelief. He laughs nervously at Chanyeol before pressing the device against his ears once more.
“Where are you?” Kyungsoo tries to ask nonchalantly when , inside, all he wants to do is throw Baekhyun out of the nearest skyscraper to his certain death.
“I’m in the fucking bathroom , idiot! Where else could I be? It’s the nearest hiding place!”
Kyungsoo smiles despite a vein in his temple coming close to exploding. “Why did you go there in the first place?” he asks sweetly. He checks back on Chanyeol who is looking busy, fiddling with his phone.
“You know exactly why! Just get him out of there! Or distract him enough until I can leave this place!”
“How do you propose we do that then?” Kyungsoo asks, his right hand massaging his temples, his irritation starting to show through his façade.
“I don’t know! Just please, Kyungsoo! I don’t want to see him right now! I’m not yet ready!”
Kyungsoo sighs as he hears desperation seep out of every word Baekhyun says. “Fine, you owe me big time,” he says and hangs up.
“So , Channie!” he says a little too brightly while clapping his hands in feigned excitement.
“I’m sorry Soo. I have to go. Dress fitting or something,” Chanyeol says as he stands up from his seat. “Tell me if you see Baek anywhere , okay? Tell him we need to talk!” and he disappears through the door leaving a dumbfounded Kyungsoo behind.
“He’s gone,” Kyungsoo deadpans as he knocks at the restroom door. A small head peeks through the small crack and checks left and right for any sign of a human Totoro. Satisfied, Baekhyun finally steps out of the restroom, smelling too much like the aroma therapy oil wafting inside.
“You’re a miracle worker , you know that?” Baekhyun says a little later as he settles back into his seat. “What did you tell him to make him leave?”
“He left himself, said something about dress fitting,” Kyungsoo answers as he contemplates whether to order another iced coffee or not.
“Oh,” Baekhyun only mutters in response, eyes downcast before settling on the view outside, chin nestled on his hand propped on top of the table.
“He told me he came here after he went to look for you at your apartment. He’s worried , Baekhyun. He told me to tell you that he wants to talk to you when I see you around,” Kyungsoo opens up the topic cautiously.
Baekhyun laughs at the thought that Chanyeol wants to talk to him. “To tell me what? I’m some kind of piece of shit and doesn’t want to see me again? That I don’t need to bother coming to his wedding?” he spats.
“You know very well that Chanyeol isn’t like that. He cares for you just as much as you care for him. You’re practically his family,” Kyungsoo argues , to which Baekhyun answers with a loud scoff and a roll of his eyes. “You know what I meant , and don’t say that you don’t. He needs to know everything. He needs to know before he settles down and before everything’s too late.”
“There’s nothing for him to know, nothing worth much of his time and ruining a perfectly pretty wedding.” Baekhyun continues to argue, righteousness starting to win over the battle against his wants.
Kyungsoo reaches out to one of Baekhyun’s hands and squeezes it lightly in an attempt to get his friend’s attention back. “You can’t decide that for yourself,” he says as he gently turns Baekhyun’s face towards him. “He needs to know what you feel so that he can decide on this for himself, to decide on what will be the best for the both of you. You haven’t even been rejected yet and you pull away without taking the risk. What if he loves you back too?”
“He doesn’t.” Baekhyun sighs, tears brimming.
“Why would he make love to you then?”
“It’s not love , Soo. It’s sex. Plain , no feelings attached sex.” Baekhyun swipes the tear threatening to fall. “He just wanted to know if it feels just as great as Jongin claims it to be. Nothing more. I’m just the stupid and willing participant in one of his experiments.”
Kyungsoo sighs as he stares at his friend. “No guy would fuck another man just for that reason alone. And I love my boyfriend to death, but we all know that whatever comes out of his mouth is trash and complete idiocy. Chanyeol would know better than to trust Jongin’s opinions.”
“So are you saying the sex isn’t nice?” Baekhyun challenges, trying to veer to another topic.
“It is, but that’s not the point here , is it?” Kyungsoo pans , as he tries to read all the emotions flying all at once in his friend’s eyes. People tease him often about his large round eyes, but he has never seen another pair of eyes more expressive than Baekhyun’s. All his emotions are in there , ready to be read if one just takes the time to appreciate them. That’s why he’s been wondering what kind of logic Chanyeol has to not be able to interpret just how much longing is in Baekhyun’s eyes every time they look at each other.
Baekhyun breaks off the eye contact and moves to continue to stare outside. It’s starting to rain , and people are clamoring to get in the small café shop.
“What exactly do you feel Baekhyun?” Kyungsoo asks later as the murmur of the shop turns slightly louder. The roll call of name by the baristas gets more frequent.
“I’m not even so sure anymore,” Baekhyun answers as he fiddles with his necklace.
Kyungsoo recognizes the necklace as a gift from Baekhyun’s stepsister, a Taurus pendant on a leather string. “Are you fine with watching him get married?”
“I am! I’m his best man right? I wouldn’t have agreed to do it if I wasn’t okay with it. It’s just that this happened! Messing everything up. All my feelings and shit.,” Baekhyun explodes, hands gripping on the pendant tightly, and he eyes his friend as if he asked the most ridiculous thing in the world.
Kyungsoo squeezes his hand apologetically, not expecting the sudden outburst. “Well, if it’s any consolation, I’m a Baekyeol shipper until the end,” he says, trying to alleviate the mood.
“Obviously, there are no ships sailing here , Kyungsoo.” Baekhyun says dejectedly.
Kyungsoo’s phone rings again , and this time he checks the caller I.D.before picking it up. “That’s Jongin calling. I better get going.”
“I’ll drive you. I need to get something , anyways.” Baekhyun offers as he stands up from his seat and walks towards the exit.
“Thanks,” Kyungsoo mutters before answering his boyfriend’s call.
part ii