FFT: Chapter 12 Part II--The Descent of Shaloma

In which half-fairy princess Shaloma completes the blue, purple and black levels of the video game underworld, crosses the Not!River Styx, and meets the mixture of two goddesses in charge of this realm; the boyfriend’s ghost is a forensics expert; the Queen of the Underworld chews out the boyfriend ( Read more... )

FFT: Chapter 12 (Part I)--The Descent of ShalomaIn which Walker tosses a Mesopotamian myth and the Crucifixion in a blender; the heroine is a half-fairy princess; people only grieve for the dying because ritual calls for it; dancing is a form of teleportation; and Hellboy, theGhost of Christmas Present, the Terminator, and the Green Man show up ( Read more... )

FFT: Chapter 11--Ala Dean and the Wonderful Lamp (Part II)

The genie encourages slavery, Ala Dean makes wishes with permanent consequences for her entire nation, no one but Ala gets anything approaching agency, and magic in Walkerworld is transphobic.

FFT: Chapter 11--Ala Dean and the Wonderful Lamp (Part I)

In which Aladdin is whitewashed and moved to Ye Olde Fantasy Europe; there’s a lot more mention of rape; taxes can be paid in people, especially women and children; Allie’s mother loathes royalty and aristocracy while wanting her daughter to marry into either; Allie’s “uncle,” Not!Jafar, ( Read more... )

FFT: Chapter 10--Sir Vivor and the Holy CauldronIn which Walker tries to turn the Grail legends into something cisfemale-centric(while also making some culturally appropriative and culturally insensitive remarks); the male lead joins a cult for no adequately explained reason; the “Holy Cauldron” can’t make anything grow; and there’s a distinct ( Read more... )

FFT--Chapter 9--BarbidolIn which life in plastic is NOT fantastic for Barbie (pardon me, Barbidol) as Ken’s expy treats her with contempt and cheats on her, her best friend’s expy fat-shames her, GI Joe’s expy threatens and abuses her, and Barbie has to decide what kind of abuse to put up with. Also, women trying to grow as people is treated as ( Read more... )

FFT: Chapter 8--Jill and the Beanroot

In which a Protagonist Who Won’t Do Anything is in for a fabulous evening’s pre-apocalypse.

FFT: Chapter 7--Thomas RhymerIn which the geography of the setting strongly resembles female genitalia, Fairyland resembles suburbia, fairy queens are mother goddesses, the hero crosses a magical menstrual river, conflict and struggle are completely nonexistent, and the three of us can’t get over how much Walker gets wrong ( Read more... )

FFT: Chapter 6--Ugly and the BeastIn which Walker hates merchants, beautiful women and transformation stories, the female lead is hideous and has no self-esteem, her family expresses little for her but ridicule, the grotesque Beast loathes his ex and claims to fear the female lead’s ugliness, the story winds up with the most broken of Aesops, and ( Read more... )

FFT: Chapter 3--Snow Night

Snow White-now with 100% fewer poisoned apples, and 100% more trigger warnings for attempted rape.

…no, we’re NOT kidding.