Last month was already 30 days ago.

[gebrauchmusik]

You wake up to a comedian on the radio talking about leaving one's taxes until the last possible second. He uses the words: "...stab a pencil in your eye" and you moan because you, yes you, are that poor wanker. You sit up and say "why am I the perpetual wanker?"
No one can answer that but you, you dumbass.