Sometimes life just gets so tiring... When each day you wake up realizing you're a failure at this, a disappointment at that.. its sometimes seems not worth it. Mind you- i can't say that when i have so much good in my life, and truly there is nothing i should complain about when the world has it much worse off than i, but it is not what life hands ( Read more... )

I hate school- im starting to realize maybe im just not cut out for it here! I mean i once thought i was smart- too bad i came to realize that kissing teachers ass' for 12 years in school didnt equate to me being smart, just teachers favoring a potential they hoped to inspire. To bad they set me up for failure... better yet, too bad i am a failure ( Read more... )

Things have felt a little different lately... It doesnt feel like Christmas at all!!! I miss Shawn and i know how sad that is, but we haven't talked since we left. I just hope that he is ok, and that all is well! I really wish he would call just so that i can tell him i love him and merry christmas! I miss tash and adam, and jen, cassie, and other ( Read more... )

Sometimes i wish to be anyone but me! And yet sometimes i dont even know who I am... How can i wish to be anyone but the person i am, when i dont know who i am to know whether i am an honorable person, or a distastful one? Life is like a puzzel... i am missing a few too many peices to be able to understand why i do the things i do, and why i am the ( Read more... )

Ok, so sometimes i wonder why things are so hard between Shawn and i... but honestly it seems like we never talk! I want to be able to call him when im happy, or when im sad: when im excited or... well... not! I dont feel like i can call him at all! I wait until after 10:30, but there is always something that keeps us from being able to have a ( Read more... )

This is a summer of self-discovery-> a journey i have been putting off for long enough... now is my chance i just do not know where to begin! So far what i have been discovering have not been things of a positive nature, but they are things important for my growth... This summer will be long, and very crutial to those i love the most! Many do not ( Read more... )

HOLY CRAP- i just realized that the last like 500 of my entries were about Shawn..lol.. good thing no one really reads these- they would start to get annoyed... hehehe... opps!

I admire, and envy anyone with the faith of willingness and certainty to die for our Lord... I know that i say that a lot, but it is true! I really wish that i could be a truly pious, and devote Catholic- one not caving to temptations, sinning in my ways, denying the Lord many times, and not listening with my whole heart when He calls my name. In ( Read more... )

I have had a great couple of days... I had a sisterly bonding day the other day- which was sweet! Then yesterday i hung out almost all day with alisha... It has been sooooooooooo long since just the two of us hung out. Although things are changing because she is pregnant, she is still the same ol'Alisha- just with more needing of support. Can you ( Read more... )

I can't exactly explain what it is like to feel as though you are five hundred light years from the only person you want to see every day, and can't! I mean, it is hard, and there are moments where i know he is busy and we couldn't be together anyways, and then there are moments where i will be thinking about him, and the phone will ring, and my ( Read more... )