This is for imadoctornotalj.

DEAR LEONARD NIMOY,
I am here to inform you that your absence in the porn industry has gone on for long enough.
Seriously, it's getting ridiculous.
All these years and not a single video of you having sex?
Do you have any idea how freakishly delicious you are?
It's not fair, and really sir, it's quite offensive that you have not showed your ( Read more... )

( Read more... )

I wrote this fanfiction for my friend's birthday. ^_^
It's called Penis Princess Party,
rated NC 17(01).
There's no inside jokes, but it's still EFFING FUNNY.
So, yes, enjoy.
Oh pairings....: Chekov/McCoy, Sulu/Scotty, Kirk/Spock, Kirk/himself. xD
ENJOY.

( birthday sex, birthday sex )

So, today I was sharing cookies with one of my good friends who knows almost EVERYTHING about me,
and we of course were talking about sex.
She has plenty of experience, while I have none.
She told me sex isn't even that pleasant for girls.
I then lost hope in all humanity.
So...due to very high standards of what sex will be, I don't think I should ever ( Read more... )

I'm listening to Sia right now.
I love her, she's incredible.
I really recommend.

I've been needing to get into new music lately.
Pandora's Spoon station sort of changed my life.
I've gotten interested in Interpol, Modest Mouse, Cake, White Stripes...
The Pixies, although I hate to admit it.
There's a reason--There was this guy who was supposed to be my ( Read more... )

Male bats have the highest rate of homosexuality of any mammal.
NO SHIT?!!! YES. THEY WERE ALWAYS MY FAVORITE ANIMALS.

An adulterous Greek male was sometimes punished by the removal of his pubic hair and the insertion of a large radish into his rectum.
KINKY BASTARDS.

"Ithyphallophobia" is a morbid fear of seeing, thinking about or having an erect ( Read more... )

Yeah...so last night I was like ZOMGFUCKINGHAPPY.
I dunno how it happened, it was just like something clicked.
And I was all singing really loud to my computer and dancing and whatever.
Then the LARGEST BAR OF BELGIUM CHOCOLATE slides under my door.
I sort of stared at it and went WTF is this....it is not Hersey's.
So then I picked it up and walked out ( Read more... )