i just want someone t o rely on. the friends prefer other people, maybe im not 'cool' enough. and the gf too. i just seem to be mr average, sometimes i think whether people wil notice if i fuck off for good

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so much has happened lately. shara got kicked out and has been living with me, now she is getting her own place.

anyway - the reason why im writing now -

been mega stressed lately, shara came over earlier, but she went off to hollys, then nikos went along....then heather....then 3 other guys,  couldnt get hold of her all night other than her moaning ( Read more... )

Sharas here atm, its her third night sleeping here, her parents chucked her out on monday. we went to the circus, had a good time and dinner then things at hers went tits up. i was being threatened too, police involvment and now shes here for a week or so. what this space...

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I didnt take my phone to work today, trying o avoid shara so i wouldnt get worked up and it worked. when i got home she was upsset i didnt call. we went out though and it was frosty between us at first, but we spoke and that helped. we just came to the conclusion about a few things, but im just worred that she will be with holly all the time and ( Read more... )

its our 7 month anniver.... she spent it with her gal mate. i picked her up from cinema n took her mate home just now, and my gf is really down, she says i know nothing about her anymore, and she cant talk about whats up. she says all her mates hate me, and when i tried to ask her whats wrong she had a go at me, and said i should just get over it ( Read more... )

''I drove in a car, I flew in a plane, to come to your house and kick your door in. now its down to this its just you and me ill blow your fucking head off, for my country.''

SMILE EMPTY SOUL - THIS IS WAR

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She loves me.

Things are different now.

I'm not happy, but stay calm don't panic. It gets you nowhere and whn it comes down to it what else is better? You know how she feels, hold on.

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Fucks sake, matt in ere now :@

anyway, today was ok, i got up at 11 and just did some f my essay till i got ready for the gym.picked shara up and we went. We got to the induction as we both got our inductions sorted. she got a training regime, while i went for the free for all but i might go for a regime too soon. We both did our thing, then went to ( Read more... )

Today was a bit packed...

I went to Sharas at 9.30am, she wasnt feeling so hot, so i got her her favourite - choc digestives and cherry coke lol. I bought a hot water bottle too, tried looking after her. We fucked up a bit though, i found it hard to deal with us, we almost ended again, how i spoke to her to keep us together made me feel like a bit ( Read more... )

....''you love me but you dont who i am''

- Let Me Go - 3 Doors Down.

I just spoke to her on msn, and that song came on, it made me feel detatched from the world for 3 minutes. While we were talking i told her how im always going to be there, in a similar situation last year, after a break i couldnt take it and ended it, and while i nearly did ( Read more... )