I Feel Pretty - The Gizoogle Remix
For this, I blame write_light! If I hadn't read his piece, I wouldn't put my story in Gizoogle.com. SO Rated F for language!
Their suits looked like tha STD shopped all up in tha Salvation Army.
"Gotta git sick ones, Dean," Sam holla'd, openin tha door ta Bootlach’s Better Buys For Men. "They last longer than tha shiznit from Target."
As they thumbed all up in tha racks, Dean nudged Sam. "Peep up tha thug model."
A thugged-out muthafucka was gazin at his dirty ass as if da thug wanted ta lick tha mirror. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Dude turned, admirin his dirty ass from every last muthafuckin angle. Dude caught tha brothers starin at his muthafuckin ass.
"Don’t I look divine?" he axed smugly. "Everythang looks slick on me biaaatch! I could wear a funky-ass burlap bag n' it would be lookin like Tommy Hilfiger."
"Yeah, yeah, pimped out," Dean nodded, n' turned back ta tha rack. Dude gave Sam a look.
"Fuck dat shit, Dean, dat muthafucka is mo' full of his dirty ass than yo ass is," Sam holla'd. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! "Didn’t know dat shiznit was possible."
"I BEG yo' pardon?" holla'd tha thugged-out man. Dude glared at Sam. "I heard that, you enormous toad!"
Sam sputtered a apology, n' looked helplessly at Dean. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. When they turned back, tha playa was gone.
**********************************************
"Ya know, dis be a phat suit," Sam observed back up in tha motel bathroom. Dude turned n' lifted tha suit coat. "Look at dat ass. That is one tight, shapely ass."
"Dude!" Dean’s head snapped up from his crazy-ass muthafuckin internizzle anime porn, so check it before ya wreck it. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. "Yo ass don’t rap bout yo' ass up in front of yo' brother!"
"Why not?" Sam continued ta look. "I work hard fo' dis ass. I work hard fo' dis slick body. Has you done peeped mah abs, biatch? My fuckin calves, biatch? My fuckin guns?"
Dean edged off his bed over ta tha one farther away. "Sammy, cut it out. It’s not funky."
Sam briefly tore his wild lil' fuckin eyes away from tha mirror. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. "I’m not bein funky, Dean. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. I’m pointin up tha obvious. I’m tall, thugged-out-hell, I be one pimpin' hunk of playa meat. Look all up in tha size of mah feet, Dean. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. No wonder every last muthafuckin biatch wants mah dirty ass."
"Hold it right there, Fabio, you’re freakin me out." Dean’s eyes grew wide. "That muthafucka-that muthafucka up in tha store-he was Narcissus muthafucka! Dude put some kind of ‘I’m Matt Damon’ curse on you, nahmean biiiatch?"
"You’re jealous," Sam holla'd, his voice growin dreamy. "You’re shorter than I am. You’re dumber than I am. I’m masculine, n' you’re...pretty."
"I aint pretty!" Dean blasted ta his wild lil' feet, outraged. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! "I'ma rip yo' nuts off!"
"Yo ass aint touchin mah amazingly big-ass nutsack or mah immense cock." Sam slipped tha suit coat down his shouldaz as if dat shiznit was a mink stole. "Or I'ma use mah immense strength ta strangle yo thugged-out ass. I can do it, you know. I work out, you shiznit yo' pretty, pretty grill wit cheeseburgers."
"I aint pretty!"
"You’re pretty, n' you’re bowlegged. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Gaze upon these long, ideal legs. Jizzy, how tha fuck could I not notice mah cheekbones?" Sam stripped off his coat, shirt, tie, pants, socks n' underwear yo. His threadz fell tha fuck ta tha bathroom tiles. "Oh. My. Dogg."
"Take it back! I aint pretty!" Dean stamped his wild lil' feet like a gangbangin' five-year-old. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka!
Dat shiznit was as if Dean wasn’t even there, so peek-a-boo, clear tha way, I be comin' thru fo'sho. Sam blew a surprised whistle all up in tha mirror. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. "How tha fuck did I not know this?" he murmured. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! "I must share dis manly beauty wit tha ghetto!" Sam strode ta tha motel door, stark naked.
Ordinarily Dean would have stopped his muthafuckin ass. But screw Sam, Dean was not pretty.
Dean ignored tha shocked, mad salty yells from outside ta take a peek up in tha bathroom mirror. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Dude was a thugged-out sonovabitch, dat schmoooove muthafucka had ta admit dis shit...
"Hey!" Dean jumped away from tha mirror. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. No way his bro was goin naked up tha fuck into tha motel parkin lot.
Their suits looked like tha STD shopped all up in tha Salvation Army.
"Gotta git sick ones, Dean," Sam holla'd, openin tha door ta Bootlach’s Better Buys For Men. "They last longer than tha shiznit from Target."
As they thumbed all up in tha racks, Dean nudged Sam. "Peep up tha thug model."
A thugged-out muthafucka was gazin at his dirty ass as if da thug wanted ta lick tha mirror. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Dude turned, admirin his dirty ass from every last muthafuckin angle. Dude caught tha brothers starin at his muthafuckin ass.
"Don’t I look divine?" he axed smugly. "Everythang looks slick on me biaaatch! I could wear a funky-ass burlap bag n' it would be lookin like Tommy Hilfiger."
"Yeah, yeah, pimped out," Dean nodded, n' turned back ta tha rack. Dude gave Sam a look.
"Fuck dat shit, Dean, dat muthafucka is mo' full of his dirty ass than yo ass is," Sam holla'd. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! "Didn’t know dat shiznit was possible."
"I BEG yo' pardon?" holla'd tha thugged-out man. Dude glared at Sam. "I heard that, you enormous toad!"
Sam sputtered a apology, n' looked helplessly at Dean. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. When they turned back, tha playa was gone.
**********************************************
"Ya know, dis be a phat suit," Sam observed back up in tha motel bathroom. Dude turned n' lifted tha suit coat. "Look at dat ass. That is one tight, shapely ass."
"Dude!" Dean’s head snapped up from his crazy-ass muthafuckin internizzle anime porn, so check it before ya wreck it. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. "Yo ass don’t rap bout yo' ass up in front of yo' brother!"
"Why not?" Sam continued ta look. "I work hard fo' dis ass. I work hard fo' dis slick body. Has you done peeped mah abs, biatch? My fuckin calves, biatch? My fuckin guns?"
Dean edged off his bed over ta tha one farther away. "Sammy, cut it out. It’s not funky."
Sam briefly tore his wild lil' fuckin eyes away from tha mirror. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. "I’m not bein funky, Dean. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. I’m pointin up tha obvious. I’m tall, thugged-out-hell, I be one pimpin' hunk of playa meat. Look all up in tha size of mah feet, Dean. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. No wonder every last muthafuckin biatch wants mah dirty ass."
"Hold it right there, Fabio, you’re freakin me out." Dean’s eyes grew wide. "That muthafucka-that muthafucka up in tha store-he was Narcissus muthafucka! Dude put some kind of ‘I’m Matt Damon’ curse on you, nahmean biiiatch?"
"You’re jealous," Sam holla'd, his voice growin dreamy. "You’re shorter than I am. You’re dumber than I am. I’m masculine, n' you’re...pretty."
"I aint pretty!" Dean blasted ta his wild lil' feet, outraged. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! "I'ma rip yo' nuts off!"
"Yo ass aint touchin mah amazingly big-ass nutsack or mah immense cock." Sam slipped tha suit coat down his shouldaz as if dat shiznit was a mink stole. "Or I'ma use mah immense strength ta strangle yo thugged-out ass. I can do it, you know. I work out, you shiznit yo' pretty, pretty grill wit cheeseburgers."
"I aint pretty!"
"You’re pretty, n' you’re bowlegged. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Gaze upon these long, ideal legs. Jizzy, how tha fuck could I not notice mah cheekbones?" Sam stripped off his coat, shirt, tie, pants, socks n' underwear yo. His threadz fell tha fuck ta tha bathroom tiles. "Oh. My. Dogg."
"Take it back! I aint pretty!" Dean stamped his wild lil' feet like a gangbangin' five-year-old. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka!
Dat shiznit was as if Dean wasn’t even there, so peek-a-boo, clear tha way, I be comin' thru fo'sho. Sam blew a surprised whistle all up in tha mirror. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. "How tha fuck did I not know this?" he murmured. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! "I must share dis manly beauty wit tha ghetto!" Sam strode ta tha motel door, stark naked.
Ordinarily Dean would have stopped his muthafuckin ass. But screw Sam, Dean was not pretty.
Dean ignored tha shocked, mad salty yells from outside ta take a peek up in tha bathroom mirror. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. Dude was a thugged-out sonovabitch, dat schmoooove muthafucka had ta admit dis shit...
"Hey!" Dean jumped away from tha mirror. Shiiit, dis aint no joke. No way his bro was goin naked up tha fuck into tha motel parkin lot.