Hammerhead: Shark Frenzy
So, Brett and I were deeply dissapointed at the ending of Hammerhead: Shark Frenzy.
I mean, the girl was strapped up horizontally onto some sort of crazy hammerheard sex table of science, facing the shark tank and she wasn't even forced through any shark lovin'.
We were just sitting there rapt, wondering what was going to happen. Was the sharkman going to eat half off her face while getting busy? Would it recognize her as its former fiancee and cry a single tear? Is it going to turn over to properly get it on?! I need to see! I want to know! Enlighten me, Sci Fi channel!!
But no. No twisted sharkman loving for us.
We just assumed that her and the sharkman would have some crazy shark sex, horribly disfiguring her in the process, and then she would be forced to have his hideous shark baby! And her and the sharkman and Jeffrey Combs would be some freaky family. Combs would be like, huggling and cooing at his shark baby like some sort of horrible scientist grandpa. It would be the best. Ending. Ever.
We don't take kindly to happy endings around here. Not at all. I mean, she didn't even get a little disfigured (not counting her nosejob, scoreoneforChad!).
I mean, the girl was strapped up horizontally onto some sort of crazy hammerheard sex table of science, facing the shark tank and she wasn't even forced through any shark lovin'.
We were just sitting there rapt, wondering what was going to happen. Was the sharkman going to eat half off her face while getting busy? Would it recognize her as its former fiancee and cry a single tear? Is it going to turn over to properly get it on?! I need to see! I want to know! Enlighten me, Sci Fi channel!!
But no. No twisted sharkman loving for us.
We just assumed that her and the sharkman would have some crazy shark sex, horribly disfiguring her in the process, and then she would be forced to have his hideous shark baby! And her and the sharkman and Jeffrey Combs would be some freaky family. Combs would be like, huggling and cooing at his shark baby like some sort of horrible scientist grandpa. It would be the best. Ending. Ever.
We don't take kindly to happy endings around here. Not at all. I mean, she didn't even get a little disfigured (not counting her nosejob, scoreoneforChad!).