She really turned me on
I am annoyed times 875487856.54645! I hate emailing or calling someone and then not getting a response.
For instance I sent someone an email like two weeks ago and nothing from them and so I sent them a short thing saying something about hoping they were alive, I was okay, talk to them later. And that was it. So bam today I get something back, but it all just made me mad. So I am being immature and ignoring it for awhile. Until I calm myself down and can reply without being mean or upset or going off.
And Matt is back in Chi town while I am here in Ohio on vacation for family. I wanted him to come but he said he had shit going on. Ok, thats cool.. but then I called him all weekend and nothing and last night he called and was like "im out drinking with the guys. I love you, talk later baby. dont do shit i wouldn't" exact words. I know cuz it was short and he hung up.
First of all.. if he was out drinking why call? He waited until then anyway, and so it could have waited longer. And then hanging up on me before I said anything.. ugh! And I called later and left a voice msg and basically asked those things and I was like "why be a dick when u know i miss u" and basicaly told him I didnt want to fight and I just needed him to realize it hurts that hes so far away and blowing me off. I didnt get a return call. So I went and got shitfaced!
My sister actually has a house full of any kind and every kind of alcohol. Seriously! Like she has a fridge in the basement stock full of wine coolers, diff kinds of beer, vodka, rum, everclear, aftershock, jose, jack, jim.. you name it. She has it. So we all got shitfaced. It was me, her hubby, her friends, some people I know from here, Brondon stopped by and Chris... wow. Chris has grown up a lot. I was so wasted last night though.. I gave three strangers a lap dance, I kinda regret it now, but its not cheating and it makes me feel sexy. They loved it, which is even better.And Chris took me to bed. Hehehe. He was like Sam lets go to bed. I said no, I hate bed, Ill sleep here. I laid on the ground. He had to pick me up and take me to my room. Now he left immediately and I woke up with a bad hangover.
I think my new plan is that when I get drunk and dont want the hangover.. ill wake up and start drinking more.
Last night was great. I felt better, forgot Matt and had a blast. But I had to get up this morning and go to church. Is that like a total double play thing or what. I was like umm cant pray, im hungover! But I like my relationship with God. I dont think it needs to change. I like to party. I LOVE it is more like it. I need to slow it down and probably stop, because its not helping my health problems, but I enjoy it too much.
I should update more. but im kinda random.
I feel so lazy right now. I cant even hit the shift key lol. and im tired. And I miss matt. GOD! See i said I wouldnt complain and that I would be fine and here I am.. complaining. But I do miss him. I wonder if he misses me. He said the ILU phrase for like the "real" first time before i flew over here. it was cute, but then he went jackass on me. that ape.. maybe i need to go to a couples therapist. i have some issues. well i do.. we dont.. i jsut make issues. well he does do stuff.. like the call. I dunno. Maybe we need to have sex. Sex fixes all. And if sex cant fix it, it cant be fixed.. as my mom says.
Tiredness. I want some alcohol! like now. Im so drawn to it. like a shiny light or something.. I think I have stopped making sense. If at all. I need sleep. peace out.
For instance I sent someone an email like two weeks ago and nothing from them and so I sent them a short thing saying something about hoping they were alive, I was okay, talk to them later. And that was it. So bam today I get something back, but it all just made me mad. So I am being immature and ignoring it for awhile. Until I calm myself down and can reply without being mean or upset or going off.
And Matt is back in Chi town while I am here in Ohio on vacation for family. I wanted him to come but he said he had shit going on. Ok, thats cool.. but then I called him all weekend and nothing and last night he called and was like "im out drinking with the guys. I love you, talk later baby. dont do shit i wouldn't" exact words. I know cuz it was short and he hung up.
First of all.. if he was out drinking why call? He waited until then anyway, and so it could have waited longer. And then hanging up on me before I said anything.. ugh! And I called later and left a voice msg and basically asked those things and I was like "why be a dick when u know i miss u" and basicaly told him I didnt want to fight and I just needed him to realize it hurts that hes so far away and blowing me off. I didnt get a return call. So I went and got shitfaced!
My sister actually has a house full of any kind and every kind of alcohol. Seriously! Like she has a fridge in the basement stock full of wine coolers, diff kinds of beer, vodka, rum, everclear, aftershock, jose, jack, jim.. you name it. She has it. So we all got shitfaced. It was me, her hubby, her friends, some people I know from here, Brondon stopped by and Chris... wow. Chris has grown up a lot. I was so wasted last night though.. I gave three strangers a lap dance, I kinda regret it now, but its not cheating and it makes me feel sexy. They loved it, which is even better.And Chris took me to bed. Hehehe. He was like Sam lets go to bed. I said no, I hate bed, Ill sleep here. I laid on the ground. He had to pick me up and take me to my room. Now he left immediately and I woke up with a bad hangover.
I think my new plan is that when I get drunk and dont want the hangover.. ill wake up and start drinking more.
Last night was great. I felt better, forgot Matt and had a blast. But I had to get up this morning and go to church. Is that like a total double play thing or what. I was like umm cant pray, im hungover! But I like my relationship with God. I dont think it needs to change. I like to party. I LOVE it is more like it. I need to slow it down and probably stop, because its not helping my health problems, but I enjoy it too much.
I should update more. but im kinda random.
I feel so lazy right now. I cant even hit the shift key lol. and im tired. And I miss matt. GOD! See i said I wouldnt complain and that I would be fine and here I am.. complaining. But I do miss him. I wonder if he misses me. He said the ILU phrase for like the "real" first time before i flew over here. it was cute, but then he went jackass on me. that ape.. maybe i need to go to a couples therapist. i have some issues. well i do.. we dont.. i jsut make issues. well he does do stuff.. like the call. I dunno. Maybe we need to have sex. Sex fixes all. And if sex cant fix it, it cant be fixed.. as my mom says.
Tiredness. I want some alcohol! like now. Im so drawn to it. like a shiny light or something.. I think I have stopped making sense. If at all. I need sleep. peace out.