Those wacky, wacky stars.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Since it's the Capricornian season of romance, I thought I'd give you some tips on how to thrive in the mysterious, paradoxical, crazy-making game of love. 1. Love shouldn't be a lottery, so don't gamble on unlikely odds. 2. Love shouldn't be a power struggle, so try to purge any unconscious yearnings you might have to control people you care for. 3. Love can't be a self-sustaining perpetual motion machine, so I hope you work on it at least as hard as you do at your job. 4. Love isn't an endless vacation in the promised land, but neither is it a wrestling match with a three-legged pit bull from hell, so don't you dare indulge in all-or-nothing fantasies.
Hey, wow, it's the Capricornian season of romance! Who knew? I didn't know. Nobody told me. Maybe I should've been wearing sexy clothes and haunting dark alleyways or something. Or wait...no, that's not right, either.
I'm slightly disappointed to learn that love isn't a wrestling match with a three-legged pit bull from hell. I was going to name him "Fluffy."
Hey, wow, it's the Capricornian season of romance! Who knew? I didn't know. Nobody told me. Maybe I should've been wearing sexy clothes and haunting dark alleyways or something. Or wait...no, that's not right, either.
I'm slightly disappointed to learn that love isn't a wrestling match with a three-legged pit bull from hell. I was going to name him "Fluffy."