(no subject)
I'm in an interesting place right now, psychically. Frank hasn't written to me since he said he liked my singing him Happy Birthday. I hope he's just busy, but I do feel rejected. John keeps telling me how much he loves me and wants to see me and how much he's changed and wants to show me and so on. I have a bunch of friends that I've been seeing and they seem to really like me. I'm feeling alright about myself. It's good to work on my business again. I haven't made too too much progress, but I want to fix my website today and come up with a letter to send to businesses and web designers.
I feel really depressed about Frank, but at the same time-for the first time-I feel like there's going to be other men. I feel like I am gorgeous and smart and clever and sweet and quirky and "something else" (in a good way). I feel like I'm going to be alright. It's a different feeling. I feel like I'm going to be fine, even if it doesn't work with Frank and even if I don't get back with John. I feel like I deserve a lot of good things out of this world because I mean something to people.
I know it's supposed to be that I should just mean something to myself and that should be good enough. But I feel my purpose in life is to leave the world more beautiful than the state it was in when I entered it. I want to make people feel happier and more loved when I leave them. It's a little different than wanting to be loved and celebrated; I want people to feel like they have something when they have me in their lives; I want to make people happier because I'm around. I want people to feel they are loved and taken care of because I'm around. I want people to see the world is a beautiful place, and I want to be the one to help them see that.
I deserve good things. I'll get them.
I feel really depressed about Frank, but at the same time-for the first time-I feel like there's going to be other men. I feel like I am gorgeous and smart and clever and sweet and quirky and "something else" (in a good way). I feel like I'm going to be alright. It's a different feeling. I feel like I'm going to be fine, even if it doesn't work with Frank and even if I don't get back with John. I feel like I deserve a lot of good things out of this world because I mean something to people.
I know it's supposed to be that I should just mean something to myself and that should be good enough. But I feel my purpose in life is to leave the world more beautiful than the state it was in when I entered it. I want to make people feel happier and more loved when I leave them. It's a little different than wanting to be loved and celebrated; I want people to feel like they have something when they have me in their lives; I want to make people happier because I'm around. I want people to feel they are loved and taken care of because I'm around. I want people to see the world is a beautiful place, and I want to be the one to help them see that.
I deserve good things. I'll get them.