Revelation of the day: I hate being alone
Today was another day of intense complaining and irritation. I worked on a task at work and I think I'm basically done with it, but all I could think about was, "man I wish I had President's Day off." I don't know if it's just cause of the hormones and PMS and stuff, and really, I'm sure that's all it is, but I am just so burnt out. I don't have a 3 day weekend until the end of May, and I don't have any personal leave to take. I have like 30 hours, but that's also my sick time, so I can't really do much with it. So basically I am stuck doing what I do. Welcome to the real world!
Anyway, the problem from yesterday was resolved and my sister let me use the Jeep. I think it was the sensible thing to do, but I think she just didn't want to fight me for it. I feel bad for making such a big deal about it, but I mean cmon - I just filled it up, I have to go get my parents tomorrow...and I had to get to work safely.
As for the subject of this post - this has been something I've gradually realized. I think that I need to force myself to be alone so that I can sort stuff out. I'd like to go to a hotel somewhere on some beach and just sit and reflect for a couple days. I'd need an agenda though so maybe I can start working on that in here. I guess some of the things that come to mind at first are as follows:
- What do I truly want out of life? What goals do I absolutely need to have? Are there any goals that I need to refine?
- What do I expect in a mate/companion? What am I getting/not getting?
I guess that's it for now... I'm sleepy. Adios.