This is something I have been meaning to write here for awhile. It is a memory from my childhood that is so fucked up. It came to mind a few months ago and I have been meaning since then to write it down ( Read more... )

Ok so we all know that my biological mother is a nutbar. (Interestingly, I usually refer to her as "my mom" here, but my sister CL pointed out that in conversation, you can tell I am talking about my biological mother because I say "my mother" whereas I refer to my stepmom as "Mom." Heh ( Read more... )

So, you know, sometimes I still feel really angry about my mother. And, after many years of denying that anyone was to blame for my life's problems, blah blah, I realized after years of therapy that actually, my mother IS to blame for almost all of my life's problems. That doesn't mean that I think it's her job to FIX my life's problems; that's my ( Read more... )

I had a civil talk with my mom on the phone yesterday. She called to ask me if I would be a personal reference for her on a loan she is trying to get. I agreed- I'm not cosigning or anything so why not? She rambled on at me for awhile about her finances, her house, the state of my Uncle Doug's estate, etc.

A sign of progress: she mentioned to ( Read more... )

I am sick. Some sort of tonsilitis. Swollen throat, swollen glands, horribly sore throat, etc. Losing voice too. Yay ( Read more... )

Sign of the apocalypse? My mother just called to tell me happy birthday. She never does that. She also said "I wanted to thank you for everything you've done over the past year." WTF? And finally, she says she got me a gift card ( Read more... )

I pulled an all-nighter last night and now I'm pulling an all-dayer today. I made myself some coffee this morning and for some reason it reminded me of making coffee for my mom when I was a kid... and I was suddenly confronted again with how crazy and inappropriate things were ( Read more... )

For the most part, I am very matter-of-fact about the fact that my mom doesn't love me. It's the best way to deal with it, really; after all, it's a reality that I can't change, so being unhappy about it would be pointless ( Read more... )

I slept most of the day. I am having a really hard time getting out of bed lately. I am not sure if it's because I am again kicking sugar, or if it's because I am depressed and stressed because of this family stuff ( Read more... )

All this dealing with my mom is really stressing me out ( Read more... )