(Untitled)

[juhuacha]

as suggested by bokane lets use this space to write up a list of 'wrongs' that we have observed in China

... 黑人 toothpaste, bad chinglish, etc.

(and just general amusements, pictures should be posted if available)

Comments

[bokane]

Freeze-dried 烤鸭.

As your moderator, I command the rest of you to post. DANCE FOR MY AMUSEMENT!

[juhuacha]

(sigh)

if just a wee bit of power gets to your head like this, i'd hate to see what you'd do with any *real* power

[bokane]

Careful what you say, hippie, or I'll beat you with the ban-stick.

[juhuacha]

I would taunt you further, but you might actually do it (in which case I would have to beat you with the ban-stick when you try to apply for a Chinese visa)

[enluya]

fake 名牌 that uses the pinyin of its chinese name as its foreign name, and below the pinyin it would say 意大利/法国名牌. ppl totally fall for that tho, haha.

this applies to japan and korea as well,
ur star status is determined by how many white ppl you have in ur music videos.

[juhuacha]

hey now, what happens if the star is white in the first place? (ie: my dreams of someday truly selling out and becoming a Chinese pop star)

[enluya]

hm...maybe you'll automatically reach 大山 status? hehe, not that you'd want it.

pop star? that means you'd be singing in english anyway loh, hehe. i recommend joining bokane's rock band :P

[juhuacha]

bokane is going to have a *punk* band, I mean, have you heard that guy sing? and more importantly: dance?!

:)

yeah, the point was that I could be filthy rich and famous in China (people are gonna stare at me anyways) but then I could leave the country and be a normal person again, too...

[bokane]

Oh, oh, and...no, wait, I forget.

Oh. Yes. The "香蕉苹果" listed as a vocabulary item in my brother's Chinese textbook. I'm told that it's just a flavor of apple that was popular like 20 years ago, but I can't stop thinking of some kind of unholy Frankenfood, and mentally translating it as "banapple."

[juhuacha]

banapple?!

whuh?!?

[bokane]

No, seriously, it's a vocabulary term in the Worst Textbook Ever.

Just a few that were on the top of my head...

[kyllo_in_china]

-"Silent" electric bicycles that let out a deafening, high-pitched squeal when you brake
-"Bad Man" brand condoms
-The translated menu at a restaurant near my house that translates 鱼香肉丝 as "Fish Dog Meat"
-People smoking, spitting on the floor, and cutting in line at the hospital
-The airport security workers who insisted on putting my friend's dog through the X-ray machine
-My Chinese teacher, who tricked me into playing 康定情歌 on my guitar in front of several thousand people at a 刀郎 concert
-This T-shirt

Re: Just a few that were on the top of my head...

[dg_lurking]

Aaaahahah, <3 teh t-shirt!

I have nothing more to add, China is perfect! Totally perfect.

Re: Just a few that were on the top of my head...

[navinator]

I want to cry to the t-shirt.

Re: Just a few that were on the top of my head...

[enluya]

haha...i love that t shirt set...
the meaning'd change if the girl alone wears it tho.

[temporaryjake]

SPLIT PANTS!

Especially when you have to look at a pooping/peeing baby on a rickity train in rural Anhui Province and dodge the baby's droppings.

[juhuacha]

the only problem is that parents will just pull the pants down and hold the kid up so they can releive themselves, ugh, in public places, ugh, and even once on my shoe!