Riding a Bicycle (1/1)
I have no excuse for this. None at all.
My third Jack/Ianto fic in almost as many days. I really need to stop.
Title: Riding a Bicycle
Fandom: Torchwood
Pairing: Jack/Ianto
Rating: R for sexual content and obvious genderfuckery.
Spoilers: Nothing specific; intended to take place mid-series two or thereabouts
Disclaimer: Not mine.
Summary: Alien artifacts with unpredictable effects leave a highly amused Ianto with a female Jack. Yes, it's a genderswap almost-crack!fic. Yes, I know. No, really, I know. I'm not sorry. It was fun to write.
It was lucky that there was no one else in the Hub to hear Ianto's steady stream of curses that rolled off his tongue in fluent Welsh. They might have thought their calm, collected, mild-mannered Ianto had been replaced by some alien shape-shifter. And then everything would have degenerated into him getting locked in a cell and tedious lines of questioning and Jack enthusiastically snogging him in front of everyone to prove that it was really Ianto.
Which would have been a hell of a lot more annoying than being the only one left behind on an artifact-retrieval mission. So Ianto supposed he should be counting his blessings that he'd been left alone.
It wouldn't be so bad if they'd keep an open comm line. But Something Had Gone Wrong (as Something Usually Did), and Jack's headset had gotten switched off, and neither Owen, nor Gwen, nor Tosh was checking in, either. So all Ianto could do was wait. (And maybe go through Jack's files and organize them all out of spite.)
The silence grew from being tiresome to worrisome, and Ianto was on the verge of grabbing his keys and taking his own car on an impromptu rescue mission when the comm system flared into life. "Ianto? Ianto, do you read me?"
Another reason he should be glad he was alone was that no one saw his wholly undignified scramble to Tosh's workstation. "Tosh? Tosh, I'm here. Is everything all right?" He would have dearly loved to scream and why the hell haven't I heard anything for an hour? but that wouldn't have been very Ianto-ish of him.
"Everything...everything's fine, yes." There was a very strange note in Tosh's voice, and an odd noise that sounded like a snort somewhere between the two 'everything's. "We've had a bit of a mishap, but everyone's in one piece. More or less." There. That definitely sounded like Tosh was repressing more than a few giggles. "We're on our way back."
Ianto frowned. "Tosh, what aren't you telling me?"
"It's something you sort of have to see. On our way back. Over and out." The line clicked and buzzed static into his ear, and absently Ianto turned it off. No news was good news, he thought sardonically, and tried not to be worried.
He had enough time before the Hub doors rolled open to make a pot of coffee and be sitting casually on the couch as Tosh walked in. "Hello, Tosh," he said pleasantly, his usual cool and collected self once again. "Where, um, where are the others?"
Tosh, obviously trying not to smile, bit her lip slightly. "Ianto, before you see them, I should probably explain what happened." She was doing that stifled-giggle thing again. Impatient but calm, he let her collect herself before continuing. "The military had established the containment site, everything was normal, and Jack, Owen and Gwen went ahead of me to start analyzing and retrieving. I got the equipment out of the SUV and was on my way when there was this blinding flash--"
"Is that coffee?" an impatient female voice interrupted, and Ianto and Tosh's heads swiveled toward it.
"Yes, help yourself," Ianto began to respond automatically, but stopped.
And stared.
Tosh's grin was simultaneously delighted and vicious. "And, well, this is what I found."
"Jack?" Ianto breathed, his voice faint.
The very tall, very dark-haired, very pissed-off, very female woman in Jack's clothing glared at him. "Yeah."
For a moment, Ianto was speechless.
Then he fell back onto the couch, laughing uproariously.
"It's not funny," Jack growled.
Ianto was laughing too hard to speak. To breathe. He paused, drew a great shuddering gasp of air, and burst out laughing again.
"Shut up."
His whole body shook. Tears rolled down his face. His obvious glee was enough to send Tosh off into gales of laughter again, and she collapsed on the couch next to him.
"I will shoot you both."
With great, great difficulty, Ianto gulped in air and fought to keep his face straight as he stood and faced his...girlfriend? The thought was enough to evoke another storm of giggles, but Ianto had always prided himself on his self-control. "Sorry, sir," he managed to say somewhat contritely. "Ma'am," he corrected, unable to keep from cracking a delighted grin.
"It's still 'sir,' thank you very much," Jack snarled, looking enormously offended. "Coffee. Now."
"Yes, Jack." Ianto turned and headed up the steps to the kitchenette, when he saw--well, who he presumed to be Gwen and Owen--out of the corner of his eye. A man and a woman, at any rate, were in the autopsy room, and a petite brunette in Owen's pin-studded lab coat ran tests on a short, dark-haired man with Gwen's eyes. They had swapped clothing, as Ianto suspected Gwen's v-necked red blouse and tight jeans had looked somewhat ridiculous on her--him? They looked nicer than they had any right to on Owen.
"Very nice breasts, Owen," Ianto called mockingly from the stairs. "And I like those jeans on you."
Owen turned to shoot him a poisonous glare. "I will kill you, tea boy."
"It was a compliment."
"Ianto, leave him alone," Gwen ordered, though her--his?--eyes were gleaming slightly, signaling that Ianto and Tosh were not the only ones who found the situation at least somewhat amusing. Ianto idly wondered if Gwen had called Rhys yet. He'd pay to see Rhys' reaction to this one.
"Ianto! Coffee!" Jack's slightly higher but still commanding voice shouted, and Ianto hurried up the steps to grab the still-hot pot and a cup for Jack.
Jack was standing with his--her?--arms crossed behind Tosh as she sat at her workstation, scanning a small silver dodecahedron Ianto assumed had started this mess. "I don't care if it's shielded, find a way around it," Jack was saying, eyes flashing dangerously. Jack still had the air of a man who had been enormously insulted, and Ianto kept his eyes downcast as he offered Jack the coffee so Jack wouldn't see his amusement.
"You can stop finding this funny and start figuring out how to fix it, Ianto," Jack snapped.
So much for looking away. Ianto looked up at Jack and let the captain see his grin. Slowly, deliberately, Ianto looked him up and down. Jack was still dark-haired, still tall, and his--damn it, her--eyes were exactly the same as they'd always been. But the obvious changes were very...obvious. Apparently, no matter what his gender, Jack was perfect. It was hard to tell through the loose-fitting clothes and greatcoat still wrapped around...her...but there was obviously a lean, curving, deadly figure there. Ianto let his gaze linger occasionally on several of the more salient new features, then finally brought his eyes back up to Jack's still-glaring face. "But you do look very nice, sir," he murmured teasingly, his eyes sparkling.
Jack's head tilted slightly, and Ianto would know that flash of arousal no matter what Jack's body looked like. "I am in no mood, Jones," Jack retorted, the side of his--her!--mouth curving up slightly despite his--her!--best efforts to stop it.
"If you two are going to flirt," Tosh began wearily, "could you please do it somewhere else?"
Jack glanced at her, tiny smile still playing about his--her, damn it, he's a woman!--lips. "Sorry, Tosh." He--Ianto gave up on trying to call Jack "she", it obvously wasn't sticking--shot Ianto a look, and turned away. "I'll be in my office," Jack declared. "Anyone finds anything, let me know." And he disappeared into his office, letting the door slam behind him.
Ianto smiled to himself, turning back to Tosh and reading her scans over her shoulder.
Tosh was grinning slyly. "Aren't you going to follow?" He was almost startled for a moment, but Tosh, Ianto reminded himself, was much more perceptive than anyone else around here (save Jack himself). Probably had to do with her being so quiet.
"He can wait for a while. Probably wants to check himself out in the mirrors."
"Herself," Tosh corrected with a little giggle.
"No, not really."
"...No, you're right."
"We can call Owen 'she', though. Shouldn't piss her off too much."
Tosh dissolved into helpless laughter.
- - -
Jack stood in front of the mirror with an inscrutable expression. He'd stripped down to his t-shirt and trousers, and was staring at himself with his arms crossed underneath what was now obviously a truly magnificent pair of breasts.
"Like I said, Jack. Very nice."
Jack didn't turn around. "Everyone gone?"
"Tosh needs her data to compile overnight and there's nothing Owen or Gwen can do."
Jack nodded, his face still totally unreadable in the mirror. "Where did you disappear to for an hour?"
Ianto took a few cautious steps forward, holding out a nondescript bag out to Jack. "I got you some clothes."
Jack shook his head. "Don't need 'em." His voice was lighter, obviously not as deep, and it was harder for Ianto to interpret its tone.
"You can't wear your clothes, Jack," Ianto sighed, exasperated, "they don't fit you."
"Don't they?"
"Too tight in the chest, for one."
Jack chuckled, once, but it was a slightly humorless sound. "Got a point."
It was obvious and redundant to say that he didn't sound like himself, but Ianto knew him well enough to guess at the underlying problem. "Miss your masculine self?" He kept his voice light, hoping to ease some of the tension in the room.
"I've had that body for two hundred years, Ianto," Jack mused, his voice distant. "This one's good, though. It'll take a little getting used to. Longterm, though, I can see myself enjoying it."
Ianto felt his mouth drop open. "You're not planning on keeping it?"
"Why not?"
"Because--" Ianto began hotly, then realized Jack was grinning at him in the mirror. "There is a time and a place, Jack," he grumbled, turning away and starting to fold the new clothes he'd bought Jack (who he'd assumed was having an existential crisis but was apparently just screwing with him) to hide his embarrassed flush.
Staying determinedly focused on his task, Ianto didn't look up when Jack turned and moved closer to him, standing just behind him and watching him fold. "I like that shirt," Jack said approvingly, and Ianto refrained from rolling his eyes with great difficulty. It was all blue Oxfords, charcoal slacks, and white t-shirts, exactly like Jack's ordinary wardrobe except for a woman instead of a man. "You guessed my size?"
"Naturally." He knew the tone would irritate Jack, but for some reason it didn't. Obviously new hormones were working on his captain. Instead of a tolerantly-amused-but-irked snort, Jack graced him with a quietly-amused-but-not-distracted chuckle. Ianto froze for a second as he felt Jack press against him, startled by the very, very different feeling. Jack was still that inch taller than him, and his lips were still the perfect height to breathe in Ianto's ear, "What were you going to say earlier?"
"Sir?" Ianto would always be proud that he managed to keep his voice from cracking.
"When you were protesting my...permanent habitation in a female body." Jack's lips were softer, more delicate as they grazed his ear, and delicately-fingered female hands were resting lightly on his waist. "You started to say 'because...' but didn't finish."
Ianto tried not to shiver. "Because you're a man, Jack. You're not supposed to have a woman's body."
"I kind of like it." Jack's lips pressed more fully against his ear. "Less obvious and embarrassing evidence of arousal, for starters."
"You never minded that before." Ianto's brain was on autopilot. Jack always made him feel like he was flying apart at the seams.
Jack laughed--no, that was a giggle. A very feminine giggle.
Ianto's knees turned to gelatin. This was so bloody hindering weird. He swallowed, hard.
Jack pressed a kiss to his neck, tightening his grip on Ianto's waist and pressing more fully into his back. Jack was a hell of a woman. "You okay?"
Ianto turned in Jack's arms, staring at him. The features were feminine, not delicate but still not male, but the look was the same. "...Yeah," Ianto breathed, and kissed him. Jack made a tiny noise and arched against him, and Jack had never done that before. There were perks to this gender-swap thing.
He hadn't slept with anyone but Jack--male Jack--in so long, he'd forgotten how it felt to kiss a woman. Still. Riding a bicycle and all that. Carefully, he turned them, making every move casual, and then gently pressed Jack back against his desk. Understanding immediately, Jack let go of his waist for a moment and hopped up onto his desk, sitting on it, reaching back to Ianto with eyes darkening more and more by the second.
Ianto took a moment to appreciate the sight of Jack, who really, really was a hell of a woman, sitting on his own desk in a tight white t-shirt, obviously turned on and looking at him like Ianto was the first food he'd had in days. "Get over here," Jack growled in a throaty contralto.
Ianto smiled wickedly. "Yes, ma'am." Obediently he took those two steps closer, letting Jack's hands slide up his arms to his shoulders and letting Jack kiss him hard, still just as demanding in everything he did. But Ianto had some ideas of his own. He let his hands lightly trail across Jack's arms, down his sides (was that a shiver? Jack was ticklish in this body? Ianto made a mental note to file that away for later) to his waist, where his hands ever so gently guided Jack's legs to wrap around his waist. He couldn't quite help grinning against Jack's lips as he rocked forward the tiniest bit.
The effect on Jack was electric. Jack's whole body jumped, his eyes snapping open and his head falling forward. "Holy God," he choked, hands tightening on Ianto's shoulders and legs tightening around his waist. "Do that again." Ianto, grinning, did, a little harder, and Jack shivered, body obviously afire with sensations he'd never experienced before. "...That's...different," Jack managed to say, trying to keep control of things, but Ianto could see how wild his eyes were.
Ianto kissed him lightly, hands resting gently on Jack's now-slender waist. "Am I actually going to get to shag you on top of your desk, Jack?"
"What?" Jack breathed distractedly.
"It's just that it's--" Ianto grinned at him. "Always been a fantasy of mine."
Jack chuckled throatily. "I might let you, just this once."
"So kind."
"Shut up and get my clothes off. Do yours while you're at it."
"Yes, sir."
- - -
They'd managed to relocate to the bed eventually, and for once, Jack was dozing in Ianto's arms. He might actually miss this female body of Jack's, Ianto thought drowsily. It made him much more inclined to cuddle, and he fit against Ianto really perfectly, one arm thrown across Ianto's bare chest and one long (long, long, impossibly long) and slender leg tangled in his. Tilting his head slightly, Ianto studied Jack's calm face, brushing some of the now-shoulder-length dark hair from his cheek. He looked startlingly like himself in sleep. That lock of hair fell across his face again, and Ianto smiled slightly as he tucked it behind Jack's ear.
Jack made a small noise, eyes fluttering open (it was definitely a flutter, Ianto thought with an internal smile, Jack's eyelashes were another thing that were impossibly long) to regard Ianto sleepily. "What?" he asked, stretching like a cat and arching against Ianto.
Ianto tightened the arm that curled around Jack's slender shoulders. "You're beautiful," he said matter-of-factly, too tired to be coy and tricky like he and Jack usually were.
Jack arched an eyebrow. "Aren't I always?"
Ianto fell back into the pillow, his laugh low and warm. Jack, still just as self-satisfied as he'd been as a man, smiled and curled up against Ianto once more.
Tosh could take her time sorting this one out.
There is now a sequel, Soap Bubbles.
My third Jack/Ianto fic in almost as many days. I really need to stop.
Title: Riding a Bicycle
Fandom: Torchwood
Pairing: Jack/Ianto
Rating: R for sexual content and obvious genderfuckery.
Spoilers: Nothing specific; intended to take place mid-series two or thereabouts
Disclaimer: Not mine.
Summary: Alien artifacts with unpredictable effects leave a highly amused Ianto with a female Jack. Yes, it's a genderswap almost-crack!fic. Yes, I know. No, really, I know. I'm not sorry. It was fun to write.
It was lucky that there was no one else in the Hub to hear Ianto's steady stream of curses that rolled off his tongue in fluent Welsh. They might have thought their calm, collected, mild-mannered Ianto had been replaced by some alien shape-shifter. And then everything would have degenerated into him getting locked in a cell and tedious lines of questioning and Jack enthusiastically snogging him in front of everyone to prove that it was really Ianto.
Which would have been a hell of a lot more annoying than being the only one left behind on an artifact-retrieval mission. So Ianto supposed he should be counting his blessings that he'd been left alone.
It wouldn't be so bad if they'd keep an open comm line. But Something Had Gone Wrong (as Something Usually Did), and Jack's headset had gotten switched off, and neither Owen, nor Gwen, nor Tosh was checking in, either. So all Ianto could do was wait. (And maybe go through Jack's files and organize them all out of spite.)
The silence grew from being tiresome to worrisome, and Ianto was on the verge of grabbing his keys and taking his own car on an impromptu rescue mission when the comm system flared into life. "Ianto? Ianto, do you read me?"
Another reason he should be glad he was alone was that no one saw his wholly undignified scramble to Tosh's workstation. "Tosh? Tosh, I'm here. Is everything all right?" He would have dearly loved to scream and why the hell haven't I heard anything for an hour? but that wouldn't have been very Ianto-ish of him.
"Everything...everything's fine, yes." There was a very strange note in Tosh's voice, and an odd noise that sounded like a snort somewhere between the two 'everything's. "We've had a bit of a mishap, but everyone's in one piece. More or less." There. That definitely sounded like Tosh was repressing more than a few giggles. "We're on our way back."
Ianto frowned. "Tosh, what aren't you telling me?"
"It's something you sort of have to see. On our way back. Over and out." The line clicked and buzzed static into his ear, and absently Ianto turned it off. No news was good news, he thought sardonically, and tried not to be worried.
He had enough time before the Hub doors rolled open to make a pot of coffee and be sitting casually on the couch as Tosh walked in. "Hello, Tosh," he said pleasantly, his usual cool and collected self once again. "Where, um, where are the others?"
Tosh, obviously trying not to smile, bit her lip slightly. "Ianto, before you see them, I should probably explain what happened." She was doing that stifled-giggle thing again. Impatient but calm, he let her collect herself before continuing. "The military had established the containment site, everything was normal, and Jack, Owen and Gwen went ahead of me to start analyzing and retrieving. I got the equipment out of the SUV and was on my way when there was this blinding flash--"
"Is that coffee?" an impatient female voice interrupted, and Ianto and Tosh's heads swiveled toward it.
"Yes, help yourself," Ianto began to respond automatically, but stopped.
And stared.
Tosh's grin was simultaneously delighted and vicious. "And, well, this is what I found."
"Jack?" Ianto breathed, his voice faint.
The very tall, very dark-haired, very pissed-off, very female woman in Jack's clothing glared at him. "Yeah."
For a moment, Ianto was speechless.
Then he fell back onto the couch, laughing uproariously.
"It's not funny," Jack growled.
Ianto was laughing too hard to speak. To breathe. He paused, drew a great shuddering gasp of air, and burst out laughing again.
"Shut up."
His whole body shook. Tears rolled down his face. His obvious glee was enough to send Tosh off into gales of laughter again, and she collapsed on the couch next to him.
"I will shoot you both."
With great, great difficulty, Ianto gulped in air and fought to keep his face straight as he stood and faced his...girlfriend? The thought was enough to evoke another storm of giggles, but Ianto had always prided himself on his self-control. "Sorry, sir," he managed to say somewhat contritely. "Ma'am," he corrected, unable to keep from cracking a delighted grin.
"It's still 'sir,' thank you very much," Jack snarled, looking enormously offended. "Coffee. Now."
"Yes, Jack." Ianto turned and headed up the steps to the kitchenette, when he saw--well, who he presumed to be Gwen and Owen--out of the corner of his eye. A man and a woman, at any rate, were in the autopsy room, and a petite brunette in Owen's pin-studded lab coat ran tests on a short, dark-haired man with Gwen's eyes. They had swapped clothing, as Ianto suspected Gwen's v-necked red blouse and tight jeans had looked somewhat ridiculous on her--him? They looked nicer than they had any right to on Owen.
"Very nice breasts, Owen," Ianto called mockingly from the stairs. "And I like those jeans on you."
Owen turned to shoot him a poisonous glare. "I will kill you, tea boy."
"It was a compliment."
"Ianto, leave him alone," Gwen ordered, though her--his?--eyes were gleaming slightly, signaling that Ianto and Tosh were not the only ones who found the situation at least somewhat amusing. Ianto idly wondered if Gwen had called Rhys yet. He'd pay to see Rhys' reaction to this one.
"Ianto! Coffee!" Jack's slightly higher but still commanding voice shouted, and Ianto hurried up the steps to grab the still-hot pot and a cup for Jack.
Jack was standing with his--her?--arms crossed behind Tosh as she sat at her workstation, scanning a small silver dodecahedron Ianto assumed had started this mess. "I don't care if it's shielded, find a way around it," Jack was saying, eyes flashing dangerously. Jack still had the air of a man who had been enormously insulted, and Ianto kept his eyes downcast as he offered Jack the coffee so Jack wouldn't see his amusement.
"You can stop finding this funny and start figuring out how to fix it, Ianto," Jack snapped.
So much for looking away. Ianto looked up at Jack and let the captain see his grin. Slowly, deliberately, Ianto looked him up and down. Jack was still dark-haired, still tall, and his--damn it, her--eyes were exactly the same as they'd always been. But the obvious changes were very...obvious. Apparently, no matter what his gender, Jack was perfect. It was hard to tell through the loose-fitting clothes and greatcoat still wrapped around...her...but there was obviously a lean, curving, deadly figure there. Ianto let his gaze linger occasionally on several of the more salient new features, then finally brought his eyes back up to Jack's still-glaring face. "But you do look very nice, sir," he murmured teasingly, his eyes sparkling.
Jack's head tilted slightly, and Ianto would know that flash of arousal no matter what Jack's body looked like. "I am in no mood, Jones," Jack retorted, the side of his--her!--mouth curving up slightly despite his--her!--best efforts to stop it.
"If you two are going to flirt," Tosh began wearily, "could you please do it somewhere else?"
Jack glanced at her, tiny smile still playing about his--her, damn it, he's a woman!--lips. "Sorry, Tosh." He--Ianto gave up on trying to call Jack "she", it obvously wasn't sticking--shot Ianto a look, and turned away. "I'll be in my office," Jack declared. "Anyone finds anything, let me know." And he disappeared into his office, letting the door slam behind him.
Ianto smiled to himself, turning back to Tosh and reading her scans over her shoulder.
Tosh was grinning slyly. "Aren't you going to follow?" He was almost startled for a moment, but Tosh, Ianto reminded himself, was much more perceptive than anyone else around here (save Jack himself). Probably had to do with her being so quiet.
"He can wait for a while. Probably wants to check himself out in the mirrors."
"Herself," Tosh corrected with a little giggle.
"No, not really."
"...No, you're right."
"We can call Owen 'she', though. Shouldn't piss her off too much."
Tosh dissolved into helpless laughter.
- - -
Jack stood in front of the mirror with an inscrutable expression. He'd stripped down to his t-shirt and trousers, and was staring at himself with his arms crossed underneath what was now obviously a truly magnificent pair of breasts.
"Like I said, Jack. Very nice."
Jack didn't turn around. "Everyone gone?"
"Tosh needs her data to compile overnight and there's nothing Owen or Gwen can do."
Jack nodded, his face still totally unreadable in the mirror. "Where did you disappear to for an hour?"
Ianto took a few cautious steps forward, holding out a nondescript bag out to Jack. "I got you some clothes."
Jack shook his head. "Don't need 'em." His voice was lighter, obviously not as deep, and it was harder for Ianto to interpret its tone.
"You can't wear your clothes, Jack," Ianto sighed, exasperated, "they don't fit you."
"Don't they?"
"Too tight in the chest, for one."
Jack chuckled, once, but it was a slightly humorless sound. "Got a point."
It was obvious and redundant to say that he didn't sound like himself, but Ianto knew him well enough to guess at the underlying problem. "Miss your masculine self?" He kept his voice light, hoping to ease some of the tension in the room.
"I've had that body for two hundred years, Ianto," Jack mused, his voice distant. "This one's good, though. It'll take a little getting used to. Longterm, though, I can see myself enjoying it."
Ianto felt his mouth drop open. "You're not planning on keeping it?"
"Why not?"
"Because--" Ianto began hotly, then realized Jack was grinning at him in the mirror. "There is a time and a place, Jack," he grumbled, turning away and starting to fold the new clothes he'd bought Jack (who he'd assumed was having an existential crisis but was apparently just screwing with him) to hide his embarrassed flush.
Staying determinedly focused on his task, Ianto didn't look up when Jack turned and moved closer to him, standing just behind him and watching him fold. "I like that shirt," Jack said approvingly, and Ianto refrained from rolling his eyes with great difficulty. It was all blue Oxfords, charcoal slacks, and white t-shirts, exactly like Jack's ordinary wardrobe except for a woman instead of a man. "You guessed my size?"
"Naturally." He knew the tone would irritate Jack, but for some reason it didn't. Obviously new hormones were working on his captain. Instead of a tolerantly-amused-but-irked snort, Jack graced him with a quietly-amused-but-not-distracted chuckle. Ianto froze for a second as he felt Jack press against him, startled by the very, very different feeling. Jack was still that inch taller than him, and his lips were still the perfect height to breathe in Ianto's ear, "What were you going to say earlier?"
"Sir?" Ianto would always be proud that he managed to keep his voice from cracking.
"When you were protesting my...permanent habitation in a female body." Jack's lips were softer, more delicate as they grazed his ear, and delicately-fingered female hands were resting lightly on his waist. "You started to say 'because...' but didn't finish."
Ianto tried not to shiver. "Because you're a man, Jack. You're not supposed to have a woman's body."
"I kind of like it." Jack's lips pressed more fully against his ear. "Less obvious and embarrassing evidence of arousal, for starters."
"You never minded that before." Ianto's brain was on autopilot. Jack always made him feel like he was flying apart at the seams.
Jack laughed--no, that was a giggle. A very feminine giggle.
Ianto's knees turned to gelatin. This was so bloody hindering weird. He swallowed, hard.
Jack pressed a kiss to his neck, tightening his grip on Ianto's waist and pressing more fully into his back. Jack was a hell of a woman. "You okay?"
Ianto turned in Jack's arms, staring at him. The features were feminine, not delicate but still not male, but the look was the same. "...Yeah," Ianto breathed, and kissed him. Jack made a tiny noise and arched against him, and Jack had never done that before. There were perks to this gender-swap thing.
He hadn't slept with anyone but Jack--male Jack--in so long, he'd forgotten how it felt to kiss a woman. Still. Riding a bicycle and all that. Carefully, he turned them, making every move casual, and then gently pressed Jack back against his desk. Understanding immediately, Jack let go of his waist for a moment and hopped up onto his desk, sitting on it, reaching back to Ianto with eyes darkening more and more by the second.
Ianto took a moment to appreciate the sight of Jack, who really, really was a hell of a woman, sitting on his own desk in a tight white t-shirt, obviously turned on and looking at him like Ianto was the first food he'd had in days. "Get over here," Jack growled in a throaty contralto.
Ianto smiled wickedly. "Yes, ma'am." Obediently he took those two steps closer, letting Jack's hands slide up his arms to his shoulders and letting Jack kiss him hard, still just as demanding in everything he did. But Ianto had some ideas of his own. He let his hands lightly trail across Jack's arms, down his sides (was that a shiver? Jack was ticklish in this body? Ianto made a mental note to file that away for later) to his waist, where his hands ever so gently guided Jack's legs to wrap around his waist. He couldn't quite help grinning against Jack's lips as he rocked forward the tiniest bit.
The effect on Jack was electric. Jack's whole body jumped, his eyes snapping open and his head falling forward. "Holy God," he choked, hands tightening on Ianto's shoulders and legs tightening around his waist. "Do that again." Ianto, grinning, did, a little harder, and Jack shivered, body obviously afire with sensations he'd never experienced before. "...That's...different," Jack managed to say, trying to keep control of things, but Ianto could see how wild his eyes were.
Ianto kissed him lightly, hands resting gently on Jack's now-slender waist. "Am I actually going to get to shag you on top of your desk, Jack?"
"What?" Jack breathed distractedly.
"It's just that it's--" Ianto grinned at him. "Always been a fantasy of mine."
Jack chuckled throatily. "I might let you, just this once."
"So kind."
"Shut up and get my clothes off. Do yours while you're at it."
"Yes, sir."
- - -
They'd managed to relocate to the bed eventually, and for once, Jack was dozing in Ianto's arms. He might actually miss this female body of Jack's, Ianto thought drowsily. It made him much more inclined to cuddle, and he fit against Ianto really perfectly, one arm thrown across Ianto's bare chest and one long (long, long, impossibly long) and slender leg tangled in his. Tilting his head slightly, Ianto studied Jack's calm face, brushing some of the now-shoulder-length dark hair from his cheek. He looked startlingly like himself in sleep. That lock of hair fell across his face again, and Ianto smiled slightly as he tucked it behind Jack's ear.
Jack made a small noise, eyes fluttering open (it was definitely a flutter, Ianto thought with an internal smile, Jack's eyelashes were another thing that were impossibly long) to regard Ianto sleepily. "What?" he asked, stretching like a cat and arching against Ianto.
Ianto tightened the arm that curled around Jack's slender shoulders. "You're beautiful," he said matter-of-factly, too tired to be coy and tricky like he and Jack usually were.
Jack arched an eyebrow. "Aren't I always?"
Ianto fell back into the pillow, his laugh low and warm. Jack, still just as self-satisfied as he'd been as a man, smiled and curled up against Ianto once more.
Tosh could take her time sorting this one out.
There is now a sequel, Soap Bubbles.