Breaking Dawn: Chapter 24 - Surprise
Projection Room Voices: Right, "Chapter Twenty-four, in which Bella and Edward see their new...erm living quarters and...celebrate Bella's birthday..."
ZeldaQueen: I'm going in!
Chapter 24: Surprise
ZeldaQueen: All I can think of is a certain line from Star Trek: The Next Fornification... *has a dirty mind*
Well, what do you know? We start off the action right away with Bella whining. What a surprise! She's fussing because she insists that she was turned into a vampire before her birthday and thus she is eighteen forever. Well of all of the idiotic and vain - Bella, weren't you just saying on your honeymoon that you didn't care if you aged a year or two so long as you looked close in age to Edward? What changed? Oh wait, you learned that you and he can still have fantastic sex so now you're back on your stupid age kick. Nevermind. Alice tells Bella to suck it up and accept the present anyway and normally I'd think Alice was being irritating, but I'm kind of siding with her on this since Bella's being such a brat.
Edward also has a key in his pocket no, he's just happy to see you with a "less gaudy blue bow" and Bella knows that it's for her after-transformation car. She wonders if she ought to feel excited, since she still has no interest in cars after being a vampire. *holds head* Bella, did you think that turning into a vampire would automatically mold you to like exactly the same things as your in-laws? Can't you just like what you want to like and tell the others to go screw themselves? No, of course not, that would require a backbone. Alice and Edward begin to bicker over who shows Bella which gift first and Alice ends up winning by suggesting Rock, Paper, Scissors and foreseeing that she will win. Erm...wouldn't that only work if Edward had already decided what he'd pick? Whatever! They decide to let Alice have her way (as per usual), and Bella picks up on several dropped hints that this gift will somehow tie in to her clothing. She wonders if Alice got her a trunkful of clothes or something. Edward also comments that it'd probably be best if they wait to see the car until Jacob was awake, so that there's someone who "is able to express the right level of enthusiasm" for it. Jerk. If you know Bella doesn't want it, why are you giving it to her? It's not like a vampire needs a car to get someplace.
Bella gives Renesmee to Rosalie and we find out that the baby is always held by someone when she sleeps. Alice comments that "She has never been set down in her entire life. She's going to be the most spoiled half-vampire in existence" to which Rosalie responds that because Renesmee is just so unique and one-of-a-kind, she's also the most unspoiled half-vampire in existence. She's going to be a bratty leech, that's for certain. Seriously Meyer, have you ever watched Nanny 911? You know that when kids get dependent on having someone sit in the room with them or sleep in bed with them at night, they can't be by themselves at night later? At the rate Renesmee's growing, she's going to be physically in her teens and insisting on Bella and Jacob and Rosalie holding her when she sleeps.
Oh, and it seems that Rosalie is of course still BFF with Bella since "I'd finally made the same choice she would have if she'd been in my shoes. That seemed to have washed away her resentment for all my other choices". Jesus these people are horrid! So what Bella, they won't like you unless you do what they would have done? You're not them! What if you had decided to give up the baby instead of having it and risking death? I just...AUGH! Why would you even want to be friends with someone like that?
Alice drags Bella and Edward off and Bella reflects on how pleased she is that she still has her human qualities of hating being given presents. *rubs head* So...she's pleased that she's still an ungrateful - no, no, I won't say it. They set off through the woods and Alice makes sure that Bella's eyes are covered. Along the way, Bella smells honeysuckle, smoke, roses, sawdust, and dug-up earth. Hmm, I wonder what this big surprise could be? Alice finally uncovers Bella's eyes and we find out that the present is...a little stone cottage. Huh.
Edward explains that Esme, being the Beloved Smother that she is, couldn't stand the thought of Bella and he living too far away but figured that they wanted a place of their own, so she fixed this place up. Uh huh. So there's just been this little stone cottage sitting out here in the woods for so long, without mention at all before now? How convenient. Alice mentions that Emmett was up for adding an extra story and a tower to it - go Emmett! - but Bella insists that she loves it the way it is. Alice leaves and Bella worries that there's some sort of pressure from her reputation of hating gifts. Edward insists that she's fine (no she's not, she's an ungrateful idiot!) and that their second gift was some alone-time. In their cottage. Hoooo boy, I wonder where this will be going. Edward carries her over the threshold, and you all already know how I feel about him carrying her everywhere, so I won't repeat myself. He asks what she's thinking and she replies "everything" and "how many superlatives [she] has in [her] head". Well, it's high time someone pointed it out. Well done, Bella.
And then we get to hear what the cottage looked like. Sweet Jesus, to we get to hear about it.
"The cottage room was something from a fairy tale. The floor was a crazy quilt of smooth, flat stones. The low ceiling had long exposed beams that someone as tall as Jacob would surely knock his head on. The walls were warm wood in some places, stone mosaics in others. The beehive fireplace in the corner held the remains of a slow flickering fire. It was driftwood burning there-the low flames were blue and green from the salt.
It was furnished in eclectic pieces, not one of them matching another, but harmonious just the same. One chair seemed vaguely medieval, while a low ottoman by the fire was more contemporary and the stocked bookshelf against the far window reminded me of movies set in Italy. Somehow each piece fit together with the others like a big three-dimensional puzzle. There were a few paintings on the walls that I recognized-some of my very favorites from the big house. Priceless originals, no doubt, but they seemed to belong here, too, like all the rest.
It was a place where anyone could believe magic existed. A place where you just expected Snow White to walk right in with her apple in hand, or a unicorn to stop and nibble at the rosebushes.
Edward had always thought that he belonged to the world of horror stories. Of course, I'd known he was dead wrong. It was obvious that he belonged here. In a fairy tale.
And now I was in the story with him."
ZeldaQueen: First, I would like to take this opportunity to rip out my hair at the hideous prose we just witnessed. Second of all Edward belonged in a fairy tale. A freaking fairy tale. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Bella, perhaps I might remind you that Edward has openly admitted to killing and eating people! And stalking you, don't forget that! And seemed more than willing to kill the dudes who were going to rape you! And ripped up James and Victoria! And was going to force you to have an abortion, promising Jacob sex with you if he went along with it! Yes, that is fairy tale-worthy if you're thinking of the Grimm Brothers with people being killed and hideously transformed and cannibalism and other horrific stuff, but you my dear are obviously thinking of Walt Disney fairy tales, with pretty flowers and singing princesses and bright colors. Yes, Edward is pretty. THAT DOES NOT MAKE HIM WORTHY OF BEING IN A HAPPY, PRETTY FAIRY TALE!!!!!! HE IS A DAMNED VAMPIRE, HE DRINKS BLOOD, HE WAS TWO BREATHS SHY OF KILLING AND EATING YOU - AND HE TOLD YOU AS MUCH - AND MIDNIGHT SUN PROVES THAT HE'S A FREAKING SOCIOPATH!!!!!!!!! STOP THINKING THAT JUST BECAUSE HE SPEAKS IN YE OLDE ENGLISH AND IS PRETTY MEANS THAT HE'S A GOOD PERSON. HE'S NOT!!!!!!
On a lighter note, I find it highly ironic that you talk about Snow White bringing her apple into the cottage, when you consider what happens when she actually eats said apple in the fairy tale. Epic fail Meyer, don't you even know that children's tale? And don't even bother trying to pretend you were thinking of the Disney version either, because it was freaking scary in that version as well.
Second of all, that description of the house up there? Classic Mary Sue house description. If you can stick with me for a bit here..
"My eyes were transfixed on the house as I dismounted. I ran up to the front of the house and looked it over. There was a white gate in the front with a fence that ran all the way around the house. A stable for horses was on the right side, a pen for sheep and pigs just off to the side near the front. There was a pasture behind the house to graze cows and horses in. And off to the left of the house was the well. The house itself was like a summer home. It was a light tan house with a white roof. The windows were Monastery style. And the front door was brown with the carving of the Triforce symbol just bellow the greeting hole. And when I then went inside I was nearly blown away.
The entire house was furnished. The living quarters had a wooden couch with cushions. A reading chair sat beside a fireplace. There was a book table beside the couch with an oil lamp on it. Candles in stands stood all around the room while oil lamps hung from the walls. In the dining quarters stood a huge wooden table with six chairs around it. A small vase of flowers sat in the middle. The kitchen had all of the cooking supplies we would ever need. There was even a spice rack on the wall. A small icebox was in the corner and another small fireplace was in the back for cooking. There was a spiral staircase that went up to the sleeping quarters. I walked up the staircase and went to see the sleeping quarters. When I reached the top I noticed there were 5 doors. Four were empty and one furnished. The one that was furnished was our Bed Chamber. There was an Edwardian bed(3) with beautiful white silk sheets and pillows. A wooden chair sat off to the right and a small table with an oil lamp sat to the left of the chair. Silk curtains lined the window. And award robe closet stood in the left side of the room."
~ My Inner Life, Back in Hyrule
"Ariana had never seen such a large house. It reminded her of a castle out of a fairy tale. Like the kind Sleeping Beauty would have lived in. The room she was led to had beautiful lavender walls, with a four posted bed gilded in gold, with a lavender bed spread. All the furniture was plated in gold, making Ariana feel even more like a princess"
~ Ariana's Hidden Power, Off to Visit Friends
"A bookcase dominated one side of the wall that held all my old Hogwarts textbooks and other assorted books I had bought over the past four years and a small study desk was next to it with a comfortable chair.
The room had the warm feel of a cosy lounge and the walls were covered in a Gryffindor red and gold and were illuminated by lamps similar to the way the Gryffindor Common room was lit. Two armchairs sat in front of a small fireplace. The floors were covered with a fine red and black Persian carpet. On a neat perch near the fireplace sat Hedwig, contentedly munching on a dead rat."
~ Rose Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, Advanced Guard
ZeldaQueen: I'm just saying...
So yeah, Edward continues to carry Bella through the house (still creepy, by the way) and takes her to where their bedroom is. Oh lordy... It turns out that Alice has provided them with a fully-stocked wardrobe which is apparently twice the size of the room. I wonder if it's larger on the inside than it is on the outside, ala the TARDIS? Being held in Edward's arms flips on Bella's hormones though, and she tells Edward that they'll be lying to Alice and telling her that she (Bella) ran straight to the wardrobe and tried on all the clothes at once. And yes, I don't like Bella's constant lying, but she's actually getting some good sexual foreplay in there which is kind of refreshing after her pitiful attempts at seduction before this. Good for her.
*blinks* Wait hold on a - they...they just went down on the floor. Literally. The instant Bella makes it apparent that she's horny, Edward pulls her face to his and they actually rip each other's clothes off and can't be bothered to make it to the bed. I...I just... *runs hand through hair* And of course she goes off, full purple prose, about how much better this is than her honeymoon sex. Because everything about vampire life is soooooo much better. She also realizes that she and Edward literally don't need to breath or sleep or eat or go to the bathroom and she can't see herself wanting to stop, so she wonders at what point they'll finish with the sexing.
... and Edward had the gall to say that Bella was run by her hormones when she was human? Condescending piece of -
They finally stop come morning and Bella asks if he misses her warmth, her soft skin, or her bacony smell, none of which she misses of course. He assures her that he still thinks she's soft and warm and that he doesn't miss her tasty smell at all, since it would bee too distracting during their love-making. Erm Meyer? Wasn't that tasty smell supposed to be the reason he fell in love with her in the first place?
The two start making out again - son of a - and Bella asks how the other Cullens manage to resist the urge to screw each other 24/7. Well Bella, not everyone is a sex-starved bag of hormones. Apparently Rosalie and Emmett were the worst and they went for an entire decade before cooling off. Bella of course thinks that she can outlast that, since her love for Edward is Just That Much Better.
Edward reminds Bella that she'll have a lot more free time, now that she doesn't need to sleep anymore, and explains that this is why he's apparently so much smarter than the other Cullens. "There's a tremendous amount of time left over when you don't have to sleep. It makes balancing your… interests quite easy. There's a reason why I'm the best musician in the family, why-besides Carlisle-I've read the most books, studied the most sciences, become fluent in the most languages.… Emmett would have you believe that I'm such a know-it-all because of the mind reading, but the truth is that I've just had a lot of free time". Wow Edward, way to be modest there. Don't any of the other Cullens read or study or take up hobbies to pass their nights? Or do they spend the entire time screwing? And I agree with Emmett, Edward is a know-it-all who mindrapes people to find stuff out. Just look at Midnight Sun. Oh, and given how you two were just acting guys, I find it highly unlikely that either of you will be spending your nights reading or learning how to play the piano.
And just to prove me right, somehow the act of laughing (what about that sentence was so funny anyway?) sets off the Hormone Alarm again and they both leap at each other and that is where the chapter ends.
ZeldaQueen: Man, when on Earth is something actually going to happen? Besides endless sex, I mean!
Projection Room Voices: This is Breaking Dawn.
ZeldaQueen: Don't remind me!
Onward to: Chapter 25: Favor
Back to: Chapter 23: Memories
Return to: Table of Contents
ZeldaQueen: I'm going in!
Chapter 24: Surprise
ZeldaQueen: All I can think of is a certain line from Star Trek: The Next Fornification... *has a dirty mind*
Well, what do you know? We start off the action right away with Bella whining. What a surprise! She's fussing because she insists that she was turned into a vampire before her birthday and thus she is eighteen forever. Well of all of the idiotic and vain - Bella, weren't you just saying on your honeymoon that you didn't care if you aged a year or two so long as you looked close in age to Edward? What changed? Oh wait, you learned that you and he can still have fantastic sex so now you're back on your stupid age kick. Nevermind. Alice tells Bella to suck it up and accept the present anyway and normally I'd think Alice was being irritating, but I'm kind of siding with her on this since Bella's being such a brat.
Edward also has a key in his pocket no, he's just happy to see you with a "less gaudy blue bow" and Bella knows that it's for her after-transformation car. She wonders if she ought to feel excited, since she still has no interest in cars after being a vampire. *holds head* Bella, did you think that turning into a vampire would automatically mold you to like exactly the same things as your in-laws? Can't you just like what you want to like and tell the others to go screw themselves? No, of course not, that would require a backbone. Alice and Edward begin to bicker over who shows Bella which gift first and Alice ends up winning by suggesting Rock, Paper, Scissors and foreseeing that she will win. Erm...wouldn't that only work if Edward had already decided what he'd pick? Whatever! They decide to let Alice have her way (as per usual), and Bella picks up on several dropped hints that this gift will somehow tie in to her clothing. She wonders if Alice got her a trunkful of clothes or something. Edward also comments that it'd probably be best if they wait to see the car until Jacob was awake, so that there's someone who "is able to express the right level of enthusiasm" for it. Jerk. If you know Bella doesn't want it, why are you giving it to her? It's not like a vampire needs a car to get someplace.
Bella gives Renesmee to Rosalie and we find out that the baby is always held by someone when she sleeps. Alice comments that "She has never been set down in her entire life. She's going to be the most spoiled half-vampire in existence" to which Rosalie responds that because Renesmee is just so unique and one-of-a-kind, she's also the most unspoiled half-vampire in existence. She's going to be a bratty leech, that's for certain. Seriously Meyer, have you ever watched Nanny 911? You know that when kids get dependent on having someone sit in the room with them or sleep in bed with them at night, they can't be by themselves at night later? At the rate Renesmee's growing, she's going to be physically in her teens and insisting on Bella and Jacob and Rosalie holding her when she sleeps.
Oh, and it seems that Rosalie is of course still BFF with Bella since "I'd finally made the same choice she would have if she'd been in my shoes. That seemed to have washed away her resentment for all my other choices". Jesus these people are horrid! So what Bella, they won't like you unless you do what they would have done? You're not them! What if you had decided to give up the baby instead of having it and risking death? I just...AUGH! Why would you even want to be friends with someone like that?
Alice drags Bella and Edward off and Bella reflects on how pleased she is that she still has her human qualities of hating being given presents. *rubs head* So...she's pleased that she's still an ungrateful - no, no, I won't say it. They set off through the woods and Alice makes sure that Bella's eyes are covered. Along the way, Bella smells honeysuckle, smoke, roses, sawdust, and dug-up earth. Hmm, I wonder what this big surprise could be? Alice finally uncovers Bella's eyes and we find out that the present is...a little stone cottage. Huh.
Edward explains that Esme, being the Beloved Smother that she is, couldn't stand the thought of Bella and he living too far away but figured that they wanted a place of their own, so she fixed this place up. Uh huh. So there's just been this little stone cottage sitting out here in the woods for so long, without mention at all before now? How convenient. Alice mentions that Emmett was up for adding an extra story and a tower to it - go Emmett! - but Bella insists that she loves it the way it is. Alice leaves and Bella worries that there's some sort of pressure from her reputation of hating gifts. Edward insists that she's fine (no she's not, she's an ungrateful idiot!) and that their second gift was some alone-time. In their cottage. Hoooo boy, I wonder where this will be going. Edward carries her over the threshold, and you all already know how I feel about him carrying her everywhere, so I won't repeat myself. He asks what she's thinking and she replies "everything" and "how many superlatives [she] has in [her] head". Well, it's high time someone pointed it out. Well done, Bella.
And then we get to hear what the cottage looked like. Sweet Jesus, to we get to hear about it.
"The cottage room was something from a fairy tale. The floor was a crazy quilt of smooth, flat stones. The low ceiling had long exposed beams that someone as tall as Jacob would surely knock his head on. The walls were warm wood in some places, stone mosaics in others. The beehive fireplace in the corner held the remains of a slow flickering fire. It was driftwood burning there-the low flames were blue and green from the salt.
It was furnished in eclectic pieces, not one of them matching another, but harmonious just the same. One chair seemed vaguely medieval, while a low ottoman by the fire was more contemporary and the stocked bookshelf against the far window reminded me of movies set in Italy. Somehow each piece fit together with the others like a big three-dimensional puzzle. There were a few paintings on the walls that I recognized-some of my very favorites from the big house. Priceless originals, no doubt, but they seemed to belong here, too, like all the rest.
It was a place where anyone could believe magic existed. A place where you just expected Snow White to walk right in with her apple in hand, or a unicorn to stop and nibble at the rosebushes.
Edward had always thought that he belonged to the world of horror stories. Of course, I'd known he was dead wrong. It was obvious that he belonged here. In a fairy tale.
And now I was in the story with him."
ZeldaQueen: First, I would like to take this opportunity to rip out my hair at the hideous prose we just witnessed. Second of all Edward belonged in a fairy tale. A freaking fairy tale. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Bella, perhaps I might remind you that Edward has openly admitted to killing and eating people! And stalking you, don't forget that! And seemed more than willing to kill the dudes who were going to rape you! And ripped up James and Victoria! And was going to force you to have an abortion, promising Jacob sex with you if he went along with it! Yes, that is fairy tale-worthy if you're thinking of the Grimm Brothers with people being killed and hideously transformed and cannibalism and other horrific stuff, but you my dear are obviously thinking of Walt Disney fairy tales, with pretty flowers and singing princesses and bright colors. Yes, Edward is pretty. THAT DOES NOT MAKE HIM WORTHY OF BEING IN A HAPPY, PRETTY FAIRY TALE!!!!!! HE IS A DAMNED VAMPIRE, HE DRINKS BLOOD, HE WAS TWO BREATHS SHY OF KILLING AND EATING YOU - AND HE TOLD YOU AS MUCH - AND MIDNIGHT SUN PROVES THAT HE'S A FREAKING SOCIOPATH!!!!!!!!! STOP THINKING THAT JUST BECAUSE HE SPEAKS IN YE OLDE ENGLISH AND IS PRETTY MEANS THAT HE'S A GOOD PERSON. HE'S NOT!!!!!!
On a lighter note, I find it highly ironic that you talk about Snow White bringing her apple into the cottage, when you consider what happens when she actually eats said apple in the fairy tale. Epic fail Meyer, don't you even know that children's tale? And don't even bother trying to pretend you were thinking of the Disney version either, because it was freaking scary in that version as well.
Second of all, that description of the house up there? Classic Mary Sue house description. If you can stick with me for a bit here..
"My eyes were transfixed on the house as I dismounted. I ran up to the front of the house and looked it over. There was a white gate in the front with a fence that ran all the way around the house. A stable for horses was on the right side, a pen for sheep and pigs just off to the side near the front. There was a pasture behind the house to graze cows and horses in. And off to the left of the house was the well. The house itself was like a summer home. It was a light tan house with a white roof. The windows were Monastery style. And the front door was brown with the carving of the Triforce symbol just bellow the greeting hole. And when I then went inside I was nearly blown away.
The entire house was furnished. The living quarters had a wooden couch with cushions. A reading chair sat beside a fireplace. There was a book table beside the couch with an oil lamp on it. Candles in stands stood all around the room while oil lamps hung from the walls. In the dining quarters stood a huge wooden table with six chairs around it. A small vase of flowers sat in the middle. The kitchen had all of the cooking supplies we would ever need. There was even a spice rack on the wall. A small icebox was in the corner and another small fireplace was in the back for cooking. There was a spiral staircase that went up to the sleeping quarters. I walked up the staircase and went to see the sleeping quarters. When I reached the top I noticed there were 5 doors. Four were empty and one furnished. The one that was furnished was our Bed Chamber. There was an Edwardian bed(3) with beautiful white silk sheets and pillows. A wooden chair sat off to the right and a small table with an oil lamp sat to the left of the chair. Silk curtains lined the window. And award robe closet stood in the left side of the room."
~ My Inner Life, Back in Hyrule
"Ariana had never seen such a large house. It reminded her of a castle out of a fairy tale. Like the kind Sleeping Beauty would have lived in. The room she was led to had beautiful lavender walls, with a four posted bed gilded in gold, with a lavender bed spread. All the furniture was plated in gold, making Ariana feel even more like a princess"
~ Ariana's Hidden Power, Off to Visit Friends
"A bookcase dominated one side of the wall that held all my old Hogwarts textbooks and other assorted books I had bought over the past four years and a small study desk was next to it with a comfortable chair.
The room had the warm feel of a cosy lounge and the walls were covered in a Gryffindor red and gold and were illuminated by lamps similar to the way the Gryffindor Common room was lit. Two armchairs sat in front of a small fireplace. The floors were covered with a fine red and black Persian carpet. On a neat perch near the fireplace sat Hedwig, contentedly munching on a dead rat."
~ Rose Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, Advanced Guard
ZeldaQueen: I'm just saying...
So yeah, Edward continues to carry Bella through the house (still creepy, by the way) and takes her to where their bedroom is. Oh lordy... It turns out that Alice has provided them with a fully-stocked wardrobe which is apparently twice the size of the room. I wonder if it's larger on the inside than it is on the outside, ala the TARDIS? Being held in Edward's arms flips on Bella's hormones though, and she tells Edward that they'll be lying to Alice and telling her that she (Bella) ran straight to the wardrobe and tried on all the clothes at once. And yes, I don't like Bella's constant lying, but she's actually getting some good sexual foreplay in there which is kind of refreshing after her pitiful attempts at seduction before this. Good for her.
*blinks* Wait hold on a - they...they just went down on the floor. Literally. The instant Bella makes it apparent that she's horny, Edward pulls her face to his and they actually rip each other's clothes off and can't be bothered to make it to the bed. I...I just... *runs hand through hair* And of course she goes off, full purple prose, about how much better this is than her honeymoon sex. Because everything about vampire life is soooooo much better. She also realizes that she and Edward literally don't need to breath or sleep or eat or go to the bathroom and she can't see herself wanting to stop, so she wonders at what point they'll finish with the sexing.
... and Edward had the gall to say that Bella was run by her hormones when she was human? Condescending piece of -
They finally stop come morning and Bella asks if he misses her warmth, her soft skin, or her bacony smell, none of which she misses of course. He assures her that he still thinks she's soft and warm and that he doesn't miss her tasty smell at all, since it would bee too distracting during their love-making. Erm Meyer? Wasn't that tasty smell supposed to be the reason he fell in love with her in the first place?
The two start making out again - son of a - and Bella asks how the other Cullens manage to resist the urge to screw each other 24/7. Well Bella, not everyone is a sex-starved bag of hormones. Apparently Rosalie and Emmett were the worst and they went for an entire decade before cooling off. Bella of course thinks that she can outlast that, since her love for Edward is Just That Much Better.
Edward reminds Bella that she'll have a lot more free time, now that she doesn't need to sleep anymore, and explains that this is why he's apparently so much smarter than the other Cullens. "There's a tremendous amount of time left over when you don't have to sleep. It makes balancing your… interests quite easy. There's a reason why I'm the best musician in the family, why-besides Carlisle-I've read the most books, studied the most sciences, become fluent in the most languages.… Emmett would have you believe that I'm such a know-it-all because of the mind reading, but the truth is that I've just had a lot of free time". Wow Edward, way to be modest there. Don't any of the other Cullens read or study or take up hobbies to pass their nights? Or do they spend the entire time screwing? And I agree with Emmett, Edward is a know-it-all who mindrapes people to find stuff out. Just look at Midnight Sun. Oh, and given how you two were just acting guys, I find it highly unlikely that either of you will be spending your nights reading or learning how to play the piano.
And just to prove me right, somehow the act of laughing (what about that sentence was so funny anyway?) sets off the Hormone Alarm again and they both leap at each other and that is where the chapter ends.
ZeldaQueen: Man, when on Earth is something actually going to happen? Besides endless sex, I mean!
Projection Room Voices: This is Breaking Dawn.
ZeldaQueen: Don't remind me!
Onward to: Chapter 25: Favor
Back to: Chapter 23: Memories
Return to: Table of Contents