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[xxbhamxplayaxx]

this is mine. ive had this journal for probably four or five years. and this week i realized something fucked up happened. somewhere along the line, im guessing when the party started or at least when i started focusing more on hanging out, i lost a fat chunk of myself. that has to be the cheesiest way to put it but ive been thinking heavily in

Comments

[ohmetalheart]

jacob i love you so much and i wish i could see you more often. this made me sad, but it had a sense of hope that also made me happy. you are stronger than people give you credit for. i want to hug you right now.

[christine2012]

it's always a really ridiculous/depressing/sobering/wtf kind of feeling when you REALLY realize how long you've been lying to yourself.

every once in a while some random thing will spark some equally random memory or thought and I'll just sit in a shitty mental haze and think about how unhappy I am, and have been, with how my life has turned out thus far.

I almost wish I did have some shitty drug or alcohol habit to quit and redirect my life. but no. I did it all without the help of anything, or anyone.

anyway, I don't have any advice or opinions - just wanted to let you know that I appreciated your honesty.

[hoping4despair]

this was the greatest journal entry i've read in a long time.

[smallstep]

i miss you you baby boy.