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the past couple weeks.
it's been a long while since i've posted. but im thinking im going to try and post regularly now, not just when i need to vent ( Read more... ) -
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why the hell would you do something so stupid as that???!!! i dont understand. you were trying to win me back, you were waiting for me. and you did something stupid. so fucking stupid. why the hell? why would you steal your moms prescription drugs and then text david and ask him if he wants to buy some? and he stupidly texted you back saying that ( Read more... ) -
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i dont know why. all i want to do is sit down and break down and cry. there's no one to talk to. everyone's at school. i dont like crying in front of matt cause he cries too. i dont know why. something must be wrong with me. -
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1 . Scrubs.
i will totally confess to this one. its probably my favorite show of all-time. My best friend and i always sing along to "guy love" and have probably watched that episode ("My Musical") about ten times. (I sing Turk's part and she sings JD's) We have had many a Scrubs marathon and I look forward to every Thursday night at 9:30 pm. for ( Read more... ) -
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wow. so im only beginning to understand how amazing my life really is. but, i do sometimes wish i could run away and get out. i've been thinking a lot about how collegei s going to work out, and ive got a perfect plan that will allow me and matt to stay together should we decide we want to continue dating :D and we're both seriously considering ( Read more... ) -
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i wish russell would leave me alone. i dont have the strength to deal with him. i dont have the heart to deal with him. i want to love him so bad, and i really really really honestly do but i just dont have the strength to tell him everything i want to tell him. Like I would love to tell him that if he really only wants for me to be happy, then ( Read more... ) -
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well. its definitely been a few days since i've written. meh. not that much has happened. a whole lot of work. not a lot of hanging out. oh wait. i had a riding lesson yesterday :] riding horses always makes me feel so good. i love the feel of a big powerful animal beneath you. its breathtaking. i worked mostly on the flat, but the small jumps i ( Read more... ) -
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wow. life just got complicated...well. i think it did. i dont actually know. i slept with matt. does that matter? yeah, i love him. i wanted to wait longer..i just...i didnt. i dont know. im so attached to matt. if he leaves me...im gonna be hurt. i wont have anywhere to turn. im a little scared of getting that close. i mean, its too late im ( Read more... ) -
xx some lines way too dangerous to cross
honestly. i wonder if things are going to work out being friends with russell. he still loves me so much. his friends say its obsessive. and you know...i love him too. in that way. i still am in love with him. just, i cant go there. i cant let myself go there. i have matt. yes, i love matt. just not the way i love russell. im sure that will grow ( Read more... )